ultrabunny

Ok..so I'm over 3 weeks sober and living a much better live :-)

But I'm now entering 'The Danger Zone'!!!

My AV (who has been very quiet up to now) has started making suggestions that I'm a normal person after all. That maybe I don't need to completely stop drinking. Just be sensible.

A friend last night text me saying 'lets go out for a drink next week'!

I was like.. 'yeah, why not'?!

Big sigh...

sofie

That does sound like scary territory! Those "why nots" seemed to always lead me to a not good place. That's just my experience, but it might be a slippery slope especially since you are doing so well and feeling better...

Sazzle

That is a toughie UltraBunny. My AV thinks I can have one, or just to toast an event, or just to show my friends I am not an alcoholic (I've only told close family) but at 10 weeks I managed to ignore it, even over Christmas, because I knew it was wrong and I was right.

I read so many posts on here about slipping after X weeks or X years and it reaffirms that I am right and the AV is wrong.

We have two minds. Our actual mind and our observing mind. Nip any thoughts in the bud and quash them as a stupid idea. Read a few of the 'slipped' posts and the advice.

But above all stay strong

S x

Dee74

you know how I knew I was an alcoholic UB...?

I spent years trying to stop drinking...a few weeks when things were starting to go really well (because I hadn't been drinking)....

and my first thought was to start drinking again...

Insanity.

D

courage2

Ultra, try to bear in mind what your actual drinking behavior is like, not your delusion about it.

Today as I was walking down the street, I kept catching glimpses into bars I haven't yet visited, cafe tables where attractive people were enjoying a glass of wine, liquor store displays of beautiful bottles of fine whiskey. And then I remembered that I don't actually drink that way anymore, haven't in a long time -- that I stopped enjoying it years ago, that I've just been feeding my addiction, alone, in secret, often with the cheapest booze I could find straight from the bottle. Check-in w/reality!

Tamerua

I started going to meetings and this was our topic the other day and something that people kept saying was to play the tape. You want one drink, or two. But what will you really do if you have that one? If you are me, you will have 6 or 7, say something stupid, wake up with a hangover and spent the day fretting. Follow it all through. you can do this!

Xune

If you want to stay sober, you cannot drink.

It is that simple. Meet your friend at Starbucks.

Received

When wanting to celebrate not drinking by having a drink, that is a clear sign there is a problem. Just had that happen a couple days ago.

Crazy, I tell you, just crazy!

FreeFall

Those thoughts are normal for someone with a problem with booze. Our reaction to booze is what isn't. If you're really honest with yourself there are probably more occasions where booze screwed up your life as opposed to those when it didn't. Don't glamorize it or let the AV get the upper hand. You're feeling good these days because you haven't been drinking. Keep it simple. You can still meet your friend, but maybe make it dinner or a movie instead.

MIRecovery

Once I removed alcohol as an option to anything things started to get better. I got into the ring with King Alcohol one too many times and got the snot beat out of me everytime. Today it is a battle I do not choose to fight because I will lose 100% of the time

mittens2020

Don't listen to the AV - it lies. I made it nearly 2 weeks and had the urge for just one. I have been struggling since then to get back more than a few days as a time. Learn from me - it's not worth blowing the time you have made!

courage2

Mittens, we miss you in the December class! Come back and tell us how you're doing!

duane1

Sounds like you haven't fully committed to stopping drinking or you have at least left that door open. Unfortunately, partial committment rarely works. I only got as far as I have (7 months) by telling everyone I had a drinking relationship w/ that I no longer drink. Perhaps you should do the same if you want what I now have.

TTBABP

Hey ultrabunny I was wondering how you were doing. Three weeks is excellent. I agree with Tamerua - play the tape through. This has - so far- been working for me. Each time I think I can have one I think through the last time I had one which turned into many more than one which is why I knew I needed to stop just before one.

Keep up the good work.

ultrabunny

Thank you all for your help.

Im going to meet my friend for a RUN not a drink :-)

Midlifecrisis

Awesome, great plan

Received

Hope your run goes/went well. My AV can be so blatantly obvious sometimes. When IT wanted me to celebrate not drinking by drinking I just and went about my afternoon/evening.

Delilah1

Running is a great way to catch up!