Hi all, my day 1
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Calgary, Canada
Posts: 69
Hi all, my day 1
Hi everyone! I was looking for some inspiration on my first day while battling my withdrawal, and I'm really glad I found these forums.
I've been drinking quite heavily for about 20 years, tried to quit a few times, tried to moderate (that sure doesn't work), quit hard liquor, still found myself trashed at least twice a week, and often starting my day with a can of cider or beer.
Alcohol destroyed my first marriage, and it started seriously endangering my second one. I had 2 drunk suicide attempts. I feel I just can't afford to fail this time even though sometimes life without the alcohol seems more terrifying than life with it.
I've been drinking quite heavily for about 20 years, tried to quit a few times, tried to moderate (that sure doesn't work), quit hard liquor, still found myself trashed at least twice a week, and often starting my day with a can of cider or beer.
Alcohol destroyed my first marriage, and it started seriously endangering my second one. I had 2 drunk suicide attempts. I feel I just can't afford to fail this time even though sometimes life without the alcohol seems more terrifying than life with it.
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome terrazinaa -
That was me, too, on the first day: terrified. I spent the first few days glued to this place in order to cope.
Just try to take it in manageable bites, a minute or hour at a time. Distractions help,too. It really will get better......
Congratulations on your decision!:ghug3
That was me, too, on the first day: terrified. I spent the first few days glued to this place in order to cope.
Just try to take it in manageable bites, a minute or hour at a time. Distractions help,too. It really will get better......
Congratulations on your decision!:ghug3
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
Hi terrazinaa. Wonderful to have you here. 
I was so afraid to let go of it, too. I don't really know why - it hadn't been anything but a living hell for years. Never fun or relaxing. Always exhausting to try and manage it. Every time I picked up, I put myself in danger. I could never predict what might happen. I had to let it go.
It feels strange in the beginning, but that will all get better. You can get the joy and happiness back in your life for good. Keep talking to us.
I was so afraid to let go of it, too. I don't really know why - it hadn't been anything but a living hell for years. Never fun or relaxing. Always exhausting to try and manage it. Every time I picked up, I put myself in danger. I could never predict what might happen. I had to let it go.
It feels strange in the beginning, but that will all get better. You can get the joy and happiness back in your life for good. Keep talking to us.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 352
Welcome.. I know exactly about that morning cider. I echo the others, just give it a try. It really does get easier.. you dont have to live in misery.. The people on this site are super, and honestly care about helping you.. let them.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Calgary, Canada
Posts: 69
Thank you all to your support!
My husband doesn't believe anymore that I can actually quit, so it's nice to have people around who share similar experiences and who are actually succeeding.
I'll just stay home for the couple of days, but I am really scared of the time when I have to get back to work/university, and have to NOT end up in a liquor store again. That will be the real battle...
My husband doesn't believe anymore that I can actually quit, so it's nice to have people around who share similar experiences and who are actually succeeding.
I'll just stay home for the couple of days, but I am really scared of the time when I have to get back to work/university, and have to NOT end up in a liquor store again. That will be the real battle...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Calgary, Canada
Posts: 69
My husband does not drink at all himself, so at least I wont have a temptation at home. He absolutely HATES when I'm even slightly intoxicated, so right now he's pretty pissed off (yesterday I had a bottle of wine, a bottle of champagne, and I counted 8 empty bottles of beer around my room this morning). It was HIS birthday.
He did promise to join a gym with me, and just spend more time getting out and being active. I found from my previous attempts to quit that exercise was the most helpful for me. After an hour of heavy workout I usually feel more like having some apple juice and less like having some cider.
He did promise to join a gym with me, and just spend more time getting out and being active. I found from my previous attempts to quit that exercise was the most helpful for me. After an hour of heavy workout I usually feel more like having some apple juice and less like having some cider.
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