4444lost

my ah is passed out, whats new, I keep telling myself to look after me and stop dwelling on him but I cant, I have no modivation to any thing for myself Im afraid to leave the house because we dont have kids we have cats but there my babies if I leave he will loose them of forget food water for them and never cleans the box.He scared all my friends away, no one wants to see us,I know the things I should be doing for myself but all I want to do is crawl into bed and stay there for ever. why cant I bring myself to an al-alon. IF he knows I go he will say Iam being brain washed.help need encouragement, family is to far away for help other than a sis is more of an alcoholic than my husband. I miss my husband being my best friend, I miss my sii being my best friend, I feel so alone.

Redheadsusie

You are not alone. There are wonderful supportive people here who unfortunately understand what you are going through. Al Anon is helpful or reading books about Codependency. I am a work in progress myself but there are such smart people here who can help you in many ways. Just know you are not alone and you deserve to be happy! Do something special for yourself! Life is a blessing!

Married33

I know how you feel . . . been there and done that over this holiday season. Isn't it funny how those of us with an alcoholic partner dread the holidays? This is a time of love and togetherness and I want no part of it because of all the years of watching my AH pass out before dinner is even served!!! I've only been on this site for a couple of days and the readings have validated my feelings and restored my faith in humanity. There are so many caring people here who have gone through what we are going through. I KNOW I AM SANE!!!! (after years of hearing how incompetent I am, I began believing it!) We are here for you! God loves you! You WILL get through this!

Seren

Hello 4444lost,

I'm sorry you are feeling so down, but I certainly do understand it. I hope you will see your doctor if this continues...you deserve to take good care of yourself!!

There have been times in my life when I have felt stuck and became really depressed. I felt as though I had no options at all but to continue on with my life as it was. But I did have options, plenty of them. I just did not like them--at all. So I stayed stuck for a lot longer than I should have because I did not like the options available to me.

I hope that today dawns a little brighter for you, and that your pathway will become clearer to you. Many hugs!

HG

redatlanta

Sorry for what you are going through. When my Ah relapsed last summer I went to Al Anon and never told him. To this day he does not know. It was for me, it was necessary and it was none of his business.

I am sorry you feel so lost I understand that feeling and I got so much support from SR when I was dealing with it. Just knowing other people understood was of great comfort.

laurie6781

(((((4444lost)))))

I know the ABYSS you speak of and it can be dreadful. Please do one thing for
yourself. Call your doctor and make an appointment for SOON. If you do not
have a family doctor, look in the yellow pages.

Then be HONEST with the Doctor and tell him/her EXACTLY what has and is
going on and how YOU are feeling, especially the crawling into bed with the
covers over your head.

You may need a bit of medical help right now, to start to bring you out of
the ABYSS so that you can find the energy to get to some Alanon meetings
and possibly find a therapist that specializes in Addictions to work one on
one with.

There is nothing like some face to face encounters with folks that have gone
through what I did or are going through it. There is STRENGTH in numbers!!

Also, please keep posting and let us know how YOU are doing. You can vent,
rant, rave, scream, cry and yes even laugh, we will and do understand.

Love and hugs,