CMack

So I have begun keeping looking back and tracking things, emotions, events, people, ect that occur prior to a relapse. If you are a chronic relaps-er like me, it could help to keep a log of everyday emotions, actions, feelings and monitor vehicles that could lead to a relapse or even just cravings.

For example:


A) Caffeine
-It has a big influence on me. I believe it is an indirect result in which too much caffeine lead to increased anxiety. That increased anxiety leads to very quick, emotional decisions like "screw it! Ill have just one drink."

B) Working Out
-This, when mixed with caffeine from an energy drinks, leads to both anxiety and high level of endorphins and just feeling good! Unfortunately, I forget how alcohol affects me, and if I go out or am around alcohol, I will reason that I can handle 1.

C) Dating
-It is pretty obvious why AA would want you to avoid dating/relationships for a year (or at least some decent amount time be it 3,6 or 9 months).
-Dating can be one of the most nerve racking, anxious moments in one's life, so the natural urge to grab a drink is ever so present.
-At the same time, dating can be pointless early because you are still finding a new you.....so the person you are on a date with isn't really getting to know you. Likewise, you aren't getting to know the because you don't quite know what you want in this new lifestyle of yours.

D) Old Friends
-The guys/girls that knew you in your "prime." Sometimes I feel like, Ahhhh one more with the old buddies! Not good.
-If they're were truly good friends, they would be happy to see you in a better lifestyle, even if it means you can't throw back a few.....instead, y'all can throw a few passes or shoot some hoops or whatever.

I'm not saying avoid these (yet) but that I need to heighten my awareness, and keep my guard up regarding my decisions.

jennikate

http://http://alcoholism.about.com/o...apse_signs.htm

This is a good link that I got on SR some time ago. Always good to examine myself and make sure I'm on the beam.

For me, the loss of routine is the biggest. It's almost like I mentally decompensate. Can't sleep or relax. Don't eat normal. But all of that was before I started really working the steps which I do every day and in every part of my life. Still, it pays to remain vigilant.

avocado

Music - which is something I love. I started listening to the Pogues again do to their christmas song "Fairytale of New York", which is kind of punky traditional Irish music - many alcohol themes. This led to downloading traditional Irish drinking songs, even though I didn't even want to drink. Then on my birthday I decided to buy a six pack and a friend brought a case over. It's all downhill from there.

kitkat1

Hi, everyone... as for me it is pure and simple. I gradually stop doing the things Alcoholics Anonymous has taught me to do, i.e., cut back on my meetings and eventually stop going altogether, become very nonchalant about prayer until I'm not praying at all, and shut myself off from other recovering people. I relapsed six months ago and have since only been able to piece together a couple of weeks at a time sober. Today is day 10 for me, and I have made a commitment to do EXACTLY what has been suggested to me by my sponsor and others with some good sobriety. Do I feel hopeless?... Not by a long shot. "Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path" (from How it Works in the Big Book). I am hanging on to those words for dear life.

I wish all of you a happy, sober Christmas. They tell me the best is yet to come, and I believe that today.

Best wishes

Kat

Natom

I'm not 'supersober'. I still drink a bit of caffiene and probably eat too much on occassion. These are things I will be dealing with once I have got the more important issues out of the way first. The thing that prompts me to relapse more than anything is women. Or more specifically women and sex. I know why this is and it is really quite fascinating. I still associate woman and sex with the money and power I associate with my old life. Gradually as I progress in recovery this association is softening but it is still something I have to be incredibly mindful of.

Someone told me in the first month of recovery that people end up going 'back out there' for the 'honey and the money'. And it was true. I did, on various occassions. So I guess women and money/power are my relapse triggers. And they are really the only thing I get euphoric recall with. But I am grateful I can recognise when my mind is going off on one and I can reign it in with a bit of recovery.

Natom.

Sazzle

Bingo! I think I am in danger of this one. I didn't realise that I had been steadily increasing my caffeine intake to replace alcohol. The anxiety and jitters are so close to alcohol. Thanks so much for posting. I thought it was me!

S x

Healthyfood

Everyone says that Caffeine triggers the urge to drink. But its opposite for me. I love coffee. Its my favorite drink.
I was at the party couple weeks ago and drunk only water and coffee. Perfect combination. Caffeine gives me some sort of high and I feel calm. I guess we all are different.

Sazzle

I wish I was like you. I love coffee and the feeling it gives, but I get an uneasy feeling not the sane day but after a few days of upping my coffee. It also screws my digestion!

Healthyfood

Sazzle

Have you tried different coffee? I used to have heartburn after fancy brand coffee. I kept trying so many of them until I found the one. There is a brand out there that will make you happy and won't screw your digestion.

Fandy

I drink 6 cups of high octane coffee every am. It doesnt associate with booze at all for me. Neither does exercise.

instant

For me there is a mindset that is very safe. Straying to far away from it and not being able to get back to it easily means there is work to be done.

I think of it using a borrowed term I heard someone else here use, "being centered". I can now recognize when I am and am not centered.

Funny as it sounds all this takes place a long way away from ideas about drinking, but more about how I thinking about, and experiencing the situation I am in. See the serenity prayer for more details.

Sazzle

Now I'm listening! Lol. I'll try and find my coffee. I do buy fancy pants coffee. I'll try a few and see. I do love the taste.

Fandy

The lighter roasts seem to have less acid effect on my stomach. I do k-cups.

hypochondriac

Great thread CMack

I have noticed the caffeine thing too so switched to decaff.

The old buddies is another problem for me. There aren't many people who were drinking friends but even those who weren't don't like the new sober me because I go out less. I am just trying to do what's best for me so I try not to feel bad about that and concentrate on making new sober friends.

Drinking associations in cultural stuff is one I have noticed too! I avoid songs that have strong drinking associations or just stuff I listened to a lot while p;ssed.

Dating is another one too, or just socialising in general. I am not quite sure how to present myself because in my head I'm still a big drinking party girl... not sure I have quite passed over to the sober side yet so am waiting til that happens first.

LadyinBC

There is something I use that I learned from my counsellor. When I'm really thinking hard about drinking I think HALT. Then I take stock and see if I am feeling the following:

H hunger
A angry
L lonely
T tired

I find that this does help as these things do trigger me and I am able to sit and think about it. Something I couldn't do before.

CMack

alcoholism.about.com/od/relapse/a/relapse_signs.htm

This link didn't work but thank you for trying.
(NOTE: My post count is too low, but the above link does work)
I found it here


Thank you all for your input. As you see, we all have different triggers. I have come to find I have a consumption issue as I tend to binge eat when food is put in front of me. I have a body fat % of 15 so you wouldn't guess, and I try and stay active.....but it is disturbing. I'll eat 5-6 slices of pizza, cookies n stuff in one sitting...almost hiding it from people. While this is may not correlate directly with alcohol, obviously there is a switch that goes off and says "CONSUME."

That switch probably goes off additionally when I drink. At times, I go through a day and have a well balanced, healthy coordinated diet, and at times, I unleash hell. Identifying this, I am discovering more triggers than need to be addressed.

dedubya

Hey Friend
just my input, I know a little about this. Not a pro.
coffee doesnt work for me. many disagree. used to love diet coke once a day.
cardio does, walkng, biking, dog stuff etc. sunlight.
not weights, just me..
I like relaxation videos, maybe some dont I do.
best
dub

OCDDan

yea, i think out of the four, dating would be one to get me drinking, for some reason, caffeine has been less appealing to me lately, probably cause the anxiety it causes, I'd rather be tired than wired

4WWWW

Thanks -Gotta be the Caffeine which has my anziety and guilt ever present.