littlemissd

When I was younger, my mother started to take care of a friends baby. He was raised with us, except when his parents felt like pretending that they were being good parents and then they would come and take him whenever they felt like it because my mom never went the legal route and got actual guardianship of him.

Now, recently, my sister had me take my nephew into my home and agreed and signed papers for me to get guardianship of my nephew. She started to use meth and lost her job and her apartment and didn't try to put him in school and they just couch surfed and she tried to pawn my four-year old nephew off on friends and family so that she would be able to go and party. I wasn't going to bring her drug use into the petition but then I ended up needing to in order for the temporary guardianship to go through. My sister does not realize that I am doing this for her and my nephew. She thinks that I want full permanent custody of him and that I wont let her back and that I was wrong for putting her drug use in the petition.

I just couldn't stomach the thought of her going through what my "step-brother" went through when he would just got taken from our home on a whim.

Hope4Bella

Well it took courage to do what you did and as all addicts..they NEVER see their faults and quick to place blame...you saved your nephew and if your sister wants to really be with her son then you just may have saved her too! Good luck with this and please keep posting...you will find support here for sure...

crazybabie

Welcome to SR. You did what you had to do in order to protect your nephew I am sorry your feeling sad about the way it had to be handled. there is likely no way to get your sister to understand as she is in active addiction. Be sure and take good care of you. You did the right thing.

littlemissd

Thanks. I had some personal anguish over this decision and I just hope this helps her to get her life together. I don't want to keep him permanently, I just want her to get better so that he could be with his mom.

crazybabie

I also hope it helps her get her life together but at least until she does the little one is safe.

JustSix

Thank you so much for saving this child. I know that you are wrestling with having to go the tough love route, but you have given her child a shot at abnormal life.

Kindeyes

That took a lot of courage. It's the little ones that really break my heart.

gentle hugs
ke

outtolunch

Thank you for putting this child's best interests above all else.

For your own sake, please consider letting go of any and all expectations that your actions may help her get her life together. There is nothing you can say or do, or not, that is going to make her get or stay clean.
You are not that powerful. None of us are.

Recovery is an inside job and we are powerless over other people's addiction.

There will be one less child in harms way because you made a difference.

ladybug77

I also would like to say "Welcome to SR" and that it was absolutely the right thing you have done. I had to make a similar decision 5 yrs ago when my son and his wife would drop my grandson off with me and maybe they would come back and maybe they wouldn't. I also had to use the drug card when pursuing guardianship and at first, like you, I hated that I had to go that route but I know I did the right thing and came to accept there was no other way without involving Child Services.

Kudos to you for stepping up and doing the right thing for your nephew. He will appreciate it (probably more than your sister ever will) and feel a sense of security he may have never known otherwise.

littlemissd

Thanks. Its great to feel the support from so many people and great to hear some feedback from someone who went through something just like it.

shivvy

Your post really moved me. Well done and dont fell bad for what you did... if she ever recovers (which i really hope she finds the courage one day to), then im sure she will thank you. If only there were more people like yourself in the world. xx

littlemissd

Thanks shivvy. It was hard, especially since I am a recovering addict as well. But I will do whatever I have to to protect my nephew.