LoveMeNow

I love a great sense of humor. My husband has a very dry, quick wit that I thoroughly enjoy. I am quick witted too but more sarcastic. Growing up around my father, you had to be thick skinned.

My husband and I always joke around and it never goes too far. We both have the ability to laugh at ourselves too. Even my kids do a great 'Dad" routine that is hysterical.

My husband's friend (clean for many years) is now working from my husband's home office. I notice that while we are joking around and poking fun at my husband, he looks over at my husband to "gage" his reaction and make sure he is laughing too.

He told me that his ex wife would take it too far and he doesn't have the ability to laugh at himself quite like we do although he wishes he did.

Although, I really enjoy our humor together...I am starting to wonder if it has desensitized our boundaries, especially when we disagree.

I have been on the phone and some of my friends have thought I was being mean when I say "Hi My addict Husband, how was your meeting?" and then he says "Hi My little Codie wife, it was good." Lil They don't realize that he calls himself that in meetings and often jokes about it. I joke about being a codie too. We often joke about his addict "more is better" thinking. There is no resentment or anger guised in our humor.

I am just not sure if our ability to joke with each other has lead us down an unhealthy path when it comes to communication skills. Although, we haven't had any communication problems lately, we both read and signed "fair fighting" rules, I do think we both have become too desensitized but I do not want to lose the laughter we enjoy.

Most close friends and family say that we love passionately, fight passionately and laugh passionately. I don't want to lose that passion.

Jody675

i have a sense of humour like yours LMN and sometimes people dont get it and take what im saying as mean, or that im just looking for a compliment or putting myself down when im just being honest with or about myself.

i guess there is a fine line between completely accepting each others issues and keeping them in a location that keeps the whole situation real and light hearted (particularly with very painful topics as yours) and just being mean. sounds like you and your partner have a good balance. i think the danger is that you could downgrade the importance of the topic and situation, but that is up to the two of you to decide.

my mum had breast cancer, then lung, brain, and bone. my sister and my mum and i use to all joke about her cancer and the treatment. we'd call her freddie kruger when she took off her wig, or ask if the doc found anything in her head when they did a brain scan. it helped us communicate on difficult topics, and each other know that we were there and werent scared to talk about the situation, but without making it a more difficult and painful time than it was for my mum. people looking in thought we were horrible. but that is how our family work too. my mum died of that cancer, and 8 years on its still painful, but it has helped me to not look back on the whole time as negative and that we could still laugh in the face of great pain and sorrow. its a gift LMN, dont lose it.

LoveMeNow

Thank you Jody. I am sorry to hear about your mother. When my mother was very sick, we all joked around too. One time, I told my mom that my sister was on her way and had "the pillow." She laughed so hard and said I knew I could depend on her. lol

You right, some people from the outside would think it is mean or inappropriate but we knew how much we loved my mother and how much she loved us. (she died 4 yrs ago) We knew how much she appreciated our sense of humor and sometimes laughter is the best medicine.