Jen31

Wednesday I went to the grocery store... bad idea. I bought wine and drank the whole bottle in a couple of minutes. I know my husband could tell I had drank again, but I never said anything and just tried to act "normal." Woke up Thursday morning with a mild headache, took some meds and went back to bed. Then, yesterday evening, I did it again. This time I had TWO bottles of wine and four beers. I dont remember much of last night, and this time my husband DID know. I was all over the house last night. Pillows in the play room, pillows in my bedroom floor, pillows in the livingroom. I dont remember a single second of any of it! When I woke my husband up for work this morning he said, "So, are you going to start drinking again??" I felt terrible. I've once again let myself down and my husband down. I feel a little "off" today... unbalanced because of the alcohol. Looking back, its just so scary how I was so quick to buy alcohol. It was like I didnt care (or think about) how long I had been sober, and what I had been working towards.
So, here I am, at day one again.

Elisabeth888

Hey, day one is better than day three of drinking!

Do you have a plan for your recovery?

Black

keep trying Jen,It will work eventually for you.

solstice3

Jen, I'm thinking about your last time when you got sick and now pillows everywhere(LOL - only funny cause I get it). I've been posting about some stuff I did in the past on some threads and when I get a craving, I've been going back to look at those (you can click on your profile and shoot directly to all your posts - I'm sure you know that...) and realizing that these things were real, I have told other people, and they can happen again. Especially one about my wrist under the "You might be an alcoholic if..." thread. And the thing of it is - these are just the tip of the iceberg. I'm just letting a wee bit of light in. But it helps - to see the posts - for me to accept that it is real and it is not normal.

Hang in there with us.

Delilah1

Sorry you are back at day one again, but like Elisabeth said better than day 3 of drinking. I am sure you are feeling bad tonight, but you can't change the past two days. However, you have control over today, tomorrow....

Welcome back.