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Withdrawal?

Old 11-16-2012, 03:58 AM
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Withdrawal?

Hi guys. I've been reading loads of posts nonstop the last few weeks and joined yesterday. I spent most of last night reading recovery stories. That combined with my daily AA meetings, I'm left with questions.

So many of the stories were "So I decided to quit right then and there, got to a meeting, got sober..." (something along those lines).

For me, that first step was never easy because of the withdrawal, even though everything in me wanted to stop drinking. I feel a bit awful asking such an ugly question, but because withdrawal for me was so freaking painful and most the reason why I ended up giving up and getting another bottle, I need to know- was it really that easy for you guys to just "put the drink down and get to a meeting"? I ended up in the ER half the time because I thought I was going to die. The sweats, the nausea, shaking, the numb hands and feet, and the god awful anxiety. Unable to walk, unable to think, wanting to die, living minute to minute- I'd last a few hours, sometimes a whole day, but would give up because the only thing that stopped it was a drink, at least for awhile until withdrawal came back and reared its head ten fold (then rinse and repeat).

Thanks, guys. Just wondering.
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Old 11-16-2012, 04:04 AM
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withdrawal can be very dangerous especially of you have been drinking heavily for an extended time and just stop. Seizures can damage you even further.

I did quit cold, but i do not think my amount of consumption was as high as others. i was very uncomfortable for 3-5 days, (but sick from another flu at the time too).

I do not practice AA so i can't comment on the meetings. but you feel UNWELL, you need a supervised medical detox for your own safety and health.

welcome to sr and congrats on stopping.
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Old 11-16-2012, 04:07 AM
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I wasn't drinking insanely compared to what I've heard at AA, or for that long a period (1-2 bottles of wine a day for a few days in a row at most- I'm a binger who could go sober for weeks), over the span of a couple years. But something in my brain chemistry sends me into massive withdrawal as if I'd been drinking for years. I did a medical detox, and man- it wasn't pretty.
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Old 11-16-2012, 04:37 AM
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I was an insane drinker and I know withdrawal very well unfortunately.

Was it easy? Hah!

I would be unable to sign my name I was shaking so bad.
I would have to crawl to the washroom and if I wanted water, I'd crawl towards the kitchen but would give up halfway through.
Couldn't stand for more than a few minutes as I was so dizzy.
Dry heaves for days.
Hiccups that on one occasion lasted 5 days.
Insomnia for more than a week.
I couldn't close my eyes at night because the hallucinations were so horrible.
I wouldn't look in the mirror but when I di by accident I would be stunned at the bruises and cuts and would have no idea how they got there.
I would reluctantly, once and a while, look at my answering machine and shudder at all the messages. Eventually, after enough withdrawals I would notice that people would stop leaving messages.
Would be so hot that I couldn't wear clothes but then would suddenly have to wrap myself in blankets because I was so cold that my teeth would chatter.
My heart would feel like it was going to explode.
On the occasion that I decided to phone 911 because I was so panicked it would take me forever to manage pushing the buttons on the phone.

In general, the hangovers which would take about a day early in my drinking, developed over time to be horrible withdrawals that could last more than a week before I could actually leave the house.

I could drone on (I haven't even touched upon the self loathing and guilt I'd go through) but, no, it wasn't as easy as just stopping.
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Old 11-16-2012, 04:49 AM
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You have to take all those stories with a grain of salt and realize that a lot less was known about safely detoxing from alcohol back in the 1930s too.
use both the support from a group and knowledge and help from your doctor.
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Old 11-16-2012, 06:40 AM
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Definitely went through withdrawal. Have had more than one seizure which at the time I attributed to something else, now not so sure. Insomnia, hot and cold, itchy skin, just feeling like general sh!t. Hard to get through....good to know I never will have to do that again.
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Old 11-16-2012, 06:50 AM
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Yeah the withdrawals are nasty. The anxiety, trembling, racing heart always led me back to another drink. The first few times I "quit" I landed in the ER a few times because I was in such a panic and confusion. However, after pure willpower, I stayed sober for about a week and it got better day by day. It sucked. Then I went back to "moderating", which didn't work, being an alcoholic.

For me, I finally ended up seeing a physician and was given short acting meds for withdrawal under medical supervision. and some anti-depressants.

I've finally balanced out and have been going to AA and working the steps, and committed to sobriety once and for all.

You can do it with or without meds-see a doctor if you really have any pressing problems.
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Old 11-16-2012, 08:58 AM
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I ended up with using a benzo Rx used in detox that I happen to have for anxiety and did Internet research on the medical protocol for detox. NOT the smartest idea ever. I generally drank 2 bottles of wine a night, but the day before I quit, I binged. It's day 4 and can barely keep food down. I look AWFUL. I stopped taking the benzos last night because I read that most of the serious risk has past by day 4. I dry heaved for days. Horrible anxiety. Sometimes sleeping all day, sometimes no sleep at all. I could barely walk the first day. I've been alternating between panicking, crying, feeling hopeful and all of the emotions.

Get a doctor to help. I've known of people who drank the amount you do who've had seizures. Better to be safe, and not to mention slightly less uncomfortable.
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Old 11-16-2012, 09:02 AM
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If a week of withdrawal can bring a lifetime of freedom. Simple choice.

But I was like you before, it is scary stuff and NOT easy. But worth it
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Old 11-16-2012, 09:06 AM
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Thanks for reminding me how much I hated w/drawl...

HATED!!!

Glad that nightmare is over,
Zube
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Old 11-16-2012, 09:16 AM
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If you get a medically supervised detox you can get past the awful part of w/d and then start your sober life. And no, it wasn't easy at all to just "put the bottle down". I went back and forth and felt like such a loser but I kept on trying and now have almost three years. W/D is awful, but you only have to go thru it once if you don't drink again.
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Old 11-16-2012, 09:21 AM
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I've already medically detoxed and I'm on day 8 or 9 of being completely sober, and I'm off the meds. I was just wondering because I never hear anyone talk about the withdrawal. I hear loads about the guilt, shame, remorse, etc, but never the actually ugly side of the physical effects. So was just wondering. Thanks guys, I'm glad I'm not the only one who sought out doctors/ER's for withdrawal. I just felt like such a cretin going to them for it so many times, but at least I never have to do it again.
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Old 11-16-2012, 09:22 AM
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Originally Posted by sothisisit View Post
I was an insane drinker and I know withdrawal very well unfortunately.

Was it easy? Hah!

I would be unable to sign my name I was shaking so bad.
I would have to crawl to the washroom and if I wanted water, I'd crawl towards the kitchen but would give up halfway through.
Couldn't stand for more than a few minutes as I was so dizzy.
Dry heaves for days.
Hiccups that on one occasion lasted 5 days.
Insomnia for more than a week.
I couldn't close my eyes at night because the hallucinations were so horrible.
I wouldn't look in the mirror but when I di by accident I would be stunned at the bruises and cuts and would have no idea how they got there.
I would reluctantly, once and a while, look at my answering machine and shudder at all the messages. Eventually, after enough withdrawals I would notice that people would stop leaving messages.
Would be so hot that I couldn't wear clothes but then would suddenly have to wrap myself in blankets because I was so cold that my teeth would chatter.
My heart would feel like it was going to explode.
On the occasion that I decided to phone 911 because I was so panicked it would take me forever to manage pushing the buttons on the phone.

In general, the hangovers which would take about a day early in my drinking, developed over time to be horrible withdrawals that could last more than a week before I could actually leave the house.

I could drone on (I haven't even touched upon the self loathing and guilt I'd go through) but, no, it wasn't as easy as just stopping.
Wow, thanks. I am so so sorry you went through all that.

Once I got through the worst of the physical side effects (I still have them- weak, can't sleep, headaches, sometimes hear things in the night), the anxiety is still there but not as bad. And don't get me started on how terrified my phone makes me.

Glad you got through it.
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Old 11-16-2012, 10:01 AM
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Originally Posted by iseult View Post
Wow, thanks. I am so so sorry you went through all that.

Once I got through the worst of the physical side effects (I still have them- weak, can't sleep, headaches, sometimes hear things in the night), the anxiety is still there but not as bad. And don't get me started on how terrified my phone makes me.

Glad you got through it.
I wish you the best in never having to go through it as badly as I have.
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Old 11-16-2012, 10:14 AM
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Originally Posted by iseult View Post

So many of the stories were "So I decided to quit right then and there, got to a meeting, got sober..." (something along those lines).
I was thinking about the reason for this and here is my thought on it; in treatment and "the rooms" its often said that we shouldn't get into telling our "war stories", i.e. recounting the ugly/stupid things we did and the nightmare of withdrawal. That it doesn't benefit anyone and keeps us focussed on the negative. I don't know if that is true or not. I am certainly guilty of doing what they say not to do but I personally find that it keeps me from forgetting. For me its a learning process every day.
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Old 11-17-2012, 09:06 AM
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Repeated detox periods, interspersed with bouts of drinking, usually get more severe with each withdrawal. This is due to the cumulative effects, it is called "kindling". I read on another of your posts about detox episodes years ago, so perhaps the severity of your withdrawal experience is more related to your drinking history than the immediate circumstances.
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Old 11-17-2012, 09:24 AM
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I am glad you did a medical detox. My doctor prescribed Librium for a few days, I didn't take it the full time. My worst day was day three, for some reason I remember feeling so on edge and ready to jump out of my skin. I am on Day 37, which is still early but the longest I have been sober since my son was born five years ago.

My withdrawals weren't horrible, but the first few days were far from pleasant. One thing I noticed last weekend was as I was helping my daughter put her earrings in my hands weren't shaking, they often shook when I was doing things like that while drinking.

There are days that are very tough, but I don't want another day one, had way too many of those. The physical withdrawals are bad, but the feelings of shame and defeat for me were equally as bad.
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