Lily1918

Really. when I feel unhappy it is because I want more attention. I have so much alone time and I hate it. I am so sick I don't even know how to work on me. I feel that if I can't have someone who will hold true to promises then I might just want no one at all. I say that, think that, but wonder if I really mean it. I never know if they aren't giving enough or if I am wanting too much. maybe it sounds like excuses but I want too much I think. I want conversation and attention. why do I need so much attention from this person. or from people in general. seriously. do I need to be alone for me to get better? Or can I just keep trucking along while in a relationship? Im asking for tough love peeps cuz I keep doing the same things over and over again. Thanks for hearing me out. I just now am starting to understand that this is wrong with me. I always told myself it was them. not saying what the addict does is right, but neither is this mentality I've had since I was 16. Ugh I just feel so ugh!!!! My sponsor is awesome. Im glad to have one. but still. I just have to get it out and admit it. Im freaking looney

jerect

You yourself are not insane only the situation that you've chosen to be in is insane.. The definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over and expecting a different result..

Ask yourself what you are doing that is not working and then do one thing to change that action.. Don't try to change an outcome that will only lead to more insanity but change your actions that are causing the same outcome over and over again..

You are aware that you are stuck and that's a good thing.. You are aware that you need to make some changes in your life and that's a good thing.. make a list of your boundaries, create some healthy goals for yourself, separate yourself from what the addict in your life is doing...

One day at a time !!!!!!!

Ann

I was delighted when someone said to me, early in recovery, "you're not crazy, you're codependent." What a relief that was...until I understood that I still needed to do a load of work to find a healthier way of living.

Meetings helped me, working the 12-step program gave me tools I have used all my life in all relationship, not just ones that involved addiction.

You'll be okay, you just need to keep working until you don't feel crazy anymore.

Hugs

dollydo

Happiness is an inside job, it is not fed to you from another. One can be in a room of 100 other people and still feel alone. Yet me, I live alone and yet are never lonely. I like being with me, I enjoy my company.

Perhaps therapy might be of benefit to you. You are not insane, you just have issues that can be resolved.

kmangel

Watch your stinkin thinking. We tend to bring about what we say and think. It is time to start thinking some healthy thoughts about yourself. Start saying what you want to see in your life.

We were created to be in relationships with others, so you are not crazy to want attention from your boyfriend. He may not be able to give you want you need due to his addiction. If you are codependent there are resources to help break any holds the codependency has over you.