Are you triggered?
Are you triggered?
Are you triggered by an active addict in denial giving you advice or acting like a cheer leader all over the forum? I was so much that I had to put the poster on ignore. Now I have two people on ignore, both in serious denial, and full of crap!!
I come here to learn from other's ESH. I come here for advice from people who have walked before me and have made it to the other side. I guess it's a good reminder that you just never know who is replying.
Maybe I should practice "take what I need and leave the rest" but I personally find it very offensive.
I come here to learn from other's ESH. I come here for advice from people who have walked before me and have made it to the other side. I guess it's a good reminder that you just never know who is replying.
Maybe I should practice "take what I need and leave the rest" but I personally find it very offensive.
Agreed. a place for our recovery. not a place to worry about whether or not our loved one is pursuing thiers
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 720
Interesting point. I find that when I get triggered for the most part there is an issue there that I haven't fully resolved for myself or worked through. Maybe it is odd but I actually appreciate the trigger so that I can focus on the issue.
Now...that said it all goes out the window if the person is intentionally trying to create an "issue" to get attention. Then I just take a breath and send out a positive thought to them.....those people make me sad.
I haven't used the ignore button yet. I try to take what I can use and leave the rest.....getting better at it with time!
Now...that said it all goes out the window if the person is intentionally trying to create an "issue" to get attention. Then I just take a breath and send out a positive thought to them.....those people make me sad.
I haven't used the ignore button yet. I try to take what I can use and leave the rest.....getting better at it with time!
One of (well actually the only) "benefit" for being with an addict for me was realizing my own issues. Experiencing the pain and heart ache he put me through and watching him destroy his life was a wake up call for me. Made me realize I'm constantly trying to fix other people because I'm broken myself and that I'm an alcoholic. It's what "pushed" me into recovery and I'm so glad it did.
I feel like I'm in an awkward position sometimes bouncing between this forum and the alcoholism forum having experience in both sides of it but I try to be helpful when I can.
I feel like I'm in an awkward position sometimes bouncing between this forum and the alcoholism forum having experience in both sides of it but I try to be helpful when I can.
LMN,
I was wondering why you weren't returning any of
my volleys!
(I think I have your #2 narrowed down to 3 posters,
but if you can't read this---how am I gonna confirm!?)
-I don't have to stay here and be insulted!....I can go
ANYWHERE and be insulted!)
I was wondering why you weren't returning any of
my volleys!
(I think I have your #2 narrowed down to 3 posters,
but if you can't read this---how am I gonna confirm!?)
-I don't have to stay here and be insulted!....I can go
ANYWHERE and be insulted!)
One of (well actually the only) "benefit" for being with an addict for me was realizing my own issues. Experiencing the pain and heart ache he put me through and watching him destroy his life was a wake up call for me. Made me realize I'm constantly trying to fix other people because I'm broken myself and that I'm an alcoholic. It's what "pushed" me into recovery and I'm so glad it did.
I feel like I'm in an awkward position sometimes bouncing between this forum and the alcoholism forum having experience in both sides of it but I try to be helpful when I can.
I feel like I'm in an awkward position sometimes bouncing between this forum and the alcoholism forum having experience in both sides of it but I try to be helpful when I can.
IMO, I don't think codependency and addiction are mutually exclusive, in fact I think they are far more common then acknowledged or discussed.
We are losing posters with some awesome ESH for a variety of reasons. We need them to help show us the way! Many of these posters showed me what I could not see for myself. It stung like hell. At times, it made me mad, I even cried a couple of times but in the end, they we were always right and I could no longer hide from my own mirror.
I can't even imagine how a healthy person in recovery feels when they reread the same sickness day after day. Thankfully, they come here to show us - there is hope. They share their wisdom and experience. Without them, we are only left whining and complaining with little chance of change and recovery.
Please, lets not take them for granted. Let's not allow them to be mistreated. Lets appreciate the value they bring.
They have done the hard work, they have truly walked before us, they are showing us what is possible. To lose their ESH would be devastating to all of us trying to seek recovery.
Thank you,
LMN
I can't even imagine how a healthy person in recovery feels when they reread the same sickness day after day. Thankfully, they come here to show us - there is hope. They share their wisdom and experience. Without them, we are only left whining and complaining with little chance of change and recovery.
Please, lets not take them for granted. Let's not allow them to be mistreated. Lets appreciate the value they bring.
They have done the hard work, they have truly walked before us, they are showing us what is possible. To lose their ESH would be devastating to all of us trying to seek recovery.
Thank you,
LMN
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 864
No I am not triggered by that. But I am triggered at times with other things and like what was written above by cangel2, I look at them because I know my triggers will teach me if I pay attention. I don‘t use the ignore feature, I learned a long time ago that if something really bugs me there is a red x in the corner I can click at any time, and walk away.
Reading the same sickness day after day…like I haven’t been there so done that and wrote it out a thousand different ways, yet always saying the same thing, ugh! It is a reminder of where I am so not going to allow myself to go again, that is for sure.
Reading the same sickness day after day…like I haven’t been there so done that and wrote it out a thousand different ways, yet always saying the same thing, ugh! It is a reminder of where I am so not going to allow myself to go again, that is for sure.
I think you should take your own advice “ take what you want, and leave the rest”. You have to remember, this forum is not driven by any one person; instead it is a collective body of people. We all share our own ES&H. If it is not what you like, or if you disagree with their views, or as you put it – you think they are “full of crap” then it is best for you just to ignore them. It may be that other people here do gain value from the ES&H of these same people. Also remember, the posters that you cherish; may be the ones that others have on “ignore”. I think it is a sign of Codependency to want to control what others say, and have others agree with your views and beliefs. At a minimum we need to respect everyone who comes here to share. I find it disrespectful when threads go off track due to little digs being thrown, or comments made with the goal of insulting specific posters. Plus, we all need to remember that type of behavior is against forum rules.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,937
I find it really creepy and very frightening....especially when there are fragile people here, especially newcomers on both sides. Myself first in the queue to bag that title.
A lot of her facts are incorrect, especially in terms of prescribing in the UK and pain management. And I cannot help but point this out.
A lot of the posts are conflicting - the poster is not an addict, is an addict, wants to get off them, is off them, flushed the pills away, is qualified to give advice due to overcoming addiction, a family member is an alcoholic so again qualified to give advice. The list goes on and on, the stories seem to spin far and wide with no element of truth.
However there is no awareness of AA, NA, ALANON, AVRT or recovery principles in general which I see as a massive concern. Or forum etiquette for that matter......
Some of the questions being asked about drug use and alcohol wave massive red flags at me and I worry that they are drug seeking behaviours.
God forbid something awful happens as there seems to be no self awareness that taking the self specified amounts of pills containing tylenol and paracetamol can be fatal. I dare not even think about other techniques to extract drugs.
Personally it is the first time I felt triggered since I joined SR.
And I apologise for venturing over to your place it's not my usual home, but I felt I had to comment. x
A lot of her facts are incorrect, especially in terms of prescribing in the UK and pain management. And I cannot help but point this out.
A lot of the posts are conflicting - the poster is not an addict, is an addict, wants to get off them, is off them, flushed the pills away, is qualified to give advice due to overcoming addiction, a family member is an alcoholic so again qualified to give advice. The list goes on and on, the stories seem to spin far and wide with no element of truth.
However there is no awareness of AA, NA, ALANON, AVRT or recovery principles in general which I see as a massive concern. Or forum etiquette for that matter......
Some of the questions being asked about drug use and alcohol wave massive red flags at me and I worry that they are drug seeking behaviours.
God forbid something awful happens as there seems to be no self awareness that taking the self specified amounts of pills containing tylenol and paracetamol can be fatal. I dare not even think about other techniques to extract drugs.
Personally it is the first time I felt triggered since I joined SR.
And I apologise for venturing over to your place it's not my usual home, but I felt I had to comment. x
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