badger1172

Well, it's Monday and that's turning out to be a problem for me. I've been going great since last Wednesday, but Monday has always (for like the past ump-teen years, except for when I was involved in Army training) a day I drank. I didn't even think twice about it this past weekend, but then I woke up this morning, and *bam*, I was clouded in the heavy reminder to drink today. I know I won't, b/c I have to work tomorrow+important meeting tomorrow night, but still am shocked that after all the good feelings I've had since dropping the beer last week that I could still feel this intense about wanting a case of beer.

Today's gonna be a struggle, but I won't drink. I just need to get through today.

badger1172

Very, very, very shaky right now. Went downstairs to lift and workout and just being down there here on a Monday and having to walk through my little 'pub' area it was almost too much for me. That voice in my head was pounding away really chatting me up, "You don't have to workout today. Just drink and take a breather from your recovery. You'll be okay for work and your meeting tomorrow evening. May be a little tired, but you'll get through it. Have some fun today, you deserve it. C'mon. It's just one day and you've done such a good job, what's it gonna matter?"

Aghhh! All right, gonna go back down there and just try to get my workout. Wish me luck...I'm gonna need it.

Windancer

You can do it! I am only on day 5 but feeling pretty positive. Somehow lately Ive been waking up without the instant thought of alcohol which is a relief...i just hope it lasts. Ive decided (and I hope I follow through) that if i have a thought about alcohol Im going to get here and post something right away! Best of luck to you.....

ForMeForThem

Fight it off Badger...don't listen to that voice, you know better. It will only lead you to the same place you're trying to get away from. Think of how good you will feel Tuesday saying you made it through your toughest day of the week. Maybe because you know the pub area is a trigger and Mondays are hard, avoid that area for today? or through a big blanket over the pub so it's not staring you down the whole time? Good luck, you can do this. Keep checking in.

doggonecarl

Dismantle your little "pub" area. If you are serious about your sobriety, you aren't going to need it.

Stay strong.

missyd23

Hang in there! I'm only on day 3. I'm starting a new job today. I feel anxious, but slept ok. Had to take a melatonin before bed. I like Formeforthem's idea of putting a blanket over the pub or avoiding the area. It sounds like you are very fit and like to work-out--so do I, and for me, the BIG helper has been thinking how alcohol harms the body. I look up the horror stories of people dying from alcohol and it helps me. I don't want to die from liver disease! Think of it as a toxin which is hurting your body.

IndaMiricale

The longer you go living sober the less those strong feeligs come about..

But they still do for me after many 24 hrs. Cunning , Baffleling , and Powerful alcohol is , and are diesease is ALWAYS waiting and wanting us back..

You didnt drink for a week so dont think your fixed in one.

How about a recovery plan ? AA saved this life long drunk for himself.

Fandy

Get out of the house, change the routine. get out with people. I don't know what the weather is like in your area, but here in NJ it's going to be almost 70 degrees.

the "little pub area" is whispering and you need to shut it up. I wouldn't advise you to dismantle the furniture, but maybe put all the drinky paraphenalia away in a box, or ask your wife to do it. get out of the basement and out into the fresh air. breathe and enjoy being sober.

(drink some coffee, brush your teeth, booze tastes craptastic with toothpaste)

badger1172

Thanks guys! Just an update: I just finished with my lifting and into about the third exercise the feeling started going away...I think the pressure of lifting heavy took away the zeal my body was feeling for drinking; it also helped me see clearer> I sat there on the weight-bench in between sets and imagined the loud music I usually play from the entertainment area and me over there at the bar nursing a beer watching the Travel Channel on mute and the whole scene looked ridiculous. Lifting kinda cleared away the cobwebs of a routine that has gone on for many years, a kind of secret celebration I have that others work on Monday and I don't go to work until Tuesday or Wednesday sometimes. But I'll tell ya, it was like a scene out of Raiders of the Lost Ark or something when they opened up the Ark and all those ghosts started flying around them...that was kinda what it was like this morning when I went down there. Didn't have any problems last time I was down there, but b/c today was such an important day before (being Monday) and this was def a day of the week I never missed, it was just deeply ingrained in me to drink today.

Thank you guys so much for your support! I was really getting seriously concerned if I was going to make it today or not. Okay, going to do cardio now...after I finish my little protein shake here. lol

Windancer

I think excercise is helpful for anything. That is something I need to improve on I think.....good luck and keep at it!

Happier

Nice job. Sounds like you turned a potentially bad and regretful decision into a good and healthy one. That's a good trade.
Time was a big trigger for me. Used to hit me as I was driving home from work. I had to change up my routine and fill that time with some other activities and habits. It is easire for me now.
Places can be tirggers too. Sounds like you have both right there. I agree with the idea of totally changing that pub area. I am looking at new houses right now. I used to love the ones with the downstairs wetbar feature. Now I hate them and wonder how I could revise them to better suit my lifestyle.

Anyway, it is great that you made it through this tough time. I've heard it said that each victory over a craving in early recovery strengthens your sobriety mucscles. Now that's a workout!

Good luck with your work and meeting tomorrow.

Fandy

it's a habit you can change....next week be prepared for Monday, have Plan B ready to use. If the room is too familiar, move to the upstairs or go out to lift. Even if you do not belong to a gym, most of them will give you a daily pass for $5.00 or $10.00, it might be worth it to shut your voice up for a few weeks.

badger1172

That is true and a good plan. I might do that.

Ya, maybe when I have those feelings, now I know what to do. Exercise! haha Thanks again guys. I might have slid right back into it if it weren't for this forum here with you giving me the will power to push through my exercise and thus getting rid of the urge to drink.

Fandy

Exercise will look much better on you than a case of beer slogging around in your stomach. you're improving your health, heart, keeping your BP even and cholesterol levels too (with regular workouts). It also boosts your mood.

so many of us struggle with feeling low and depressed, both when drinking and recovering, the seasons, lack of light, etc. JMHO, but if there is ANY magic bullet to help most people feel better it's exercise...and moving around the block DOES count....so does walking the dog.

(when i was 3.5 months sober the first time, I adopted a little adult dog, even when i relapsed it was shorter in duration, because of him, I didn't want to embarrass him walking around drunk)

Taking5

Good job on the lifting. After the cardio I suggest you dismantle your pub as doggonecarl suggested.

Maylie

Great job not giving in! We all have that little voice and it will turn anything into an excuse to drink/use! Have you thought about moving your work out area or taking any type of alcohol out of the drinking area so that in a weak moment there isn't anything there for you to drink?

As said before, have a plan B for next Monday if you know it is a really tough day for you. Maybe on Mondays have a packed day so that you can stay busy and keep your mind off drinking. Do you have sober friends that you can go out and do things with on Mondays or any days that you wake up just knowing it will be a hard day?

Keep going strong

Delilah1

Good for you Badger!! I have definitely found exercise more enjoyable without that dizzy feeling which ultimately didn't allow me to get as much out if my workout.

Why don't you turn your little pub into a juice bar. Protein shakes can be stored Ina little fridge and you can keep a blender to offer a multitude of options!!

Keep up the great work, and good luck with your meeting tomorrow night!!!

Windancer

Change channels, do something else, post on here, anything to stay strong!!!!!!! All the advice I try to give myself. You CAN do it!!!!! There is lots of good advice and support on here!

badger1172

Well, as far as dismantling the pub area, that's just not gonna happen, but let me explain why. My grandparents built the house I live in now, which came to me after them. Granddad and I were both Army and he was what is now considered a Special Forces unit that no longer exists. I have a lot of good childhood memories in that area of the basement, and it's kind of become a military shrine to my family's service. Now, that being said, we still plan to use for entertaining and such, doesn't mean I have to drink, and we don't entertain very often anyway, but it's nice to have just in case. Also, that bar area is just too well built to tear out by myself, not that I would anyway. Just saying. I"m just going to have to get used to dealing with it, and that will take time, but it will happen and will grow to look at it not as the alcohol abused area I've turned it into since living here, but rather the area that reminds me of the service my granddad, dad, and I did and all the great memories/stories that go with it, plus my childhood memories of my granddad. It's just means too much to me for the positive thoughts to tear it out. But, you guys didn't know any of that and if it was anywhere else I would do exactly what you guys advise and rip that sucker out and turn it into a painting studio or some sort of thing. lol

Windancer

Its hard when you have to see something like that all the time. And it got to the point with me that Id "find" a trigger almost anywhere. Unfortunately I cant remove alcohol from the world, but I can remove alcohol from my head (with practice).