Realization this morning
Realization this morning
Today I start week 2 and I'm feeling good about making it through a week. I've had some urges I've had to fight off and sometimes I think about getting a bottle of wine out of habit and I have to remind myself, NO!
Well, this morning laying in bed at 5:30 am, I was thinking how great I felt making it through a week and then my thoughts started drifting...I thought "maybe my problem isn't drinking, it's just drinking wine" (because as hard as it was, I've accepted the fact that I can not moderate wine, once I have one, I'm done). I thought "maybe if I try a different cocktail I can be a "normal" drinker and just have a few in the evening", and then started thinking about what cocktails I could try, until all of a sudden it just hit me..."WHAT ARE YOU DOING???? Normal drinkers do not lie in bed at 5:30 on a Sunday thinking about what cocktails they can drink because they have a problem with wine". Clearly my problem is not just wine, my problem is drinking, period.
I have to accept that and keep a check on those thoughts, it's been easy to convince myself in the past, I can't go there this time.
Well, this morning laying in bed at 5:30 am, I was thinking how great I felt making it through a week and then my thoughts started drifting...I thought "maybe my problem isn't drinking, it's just drinking wine" (because as hard as it was, I've accepted the fact that I can not moderate wine, once I have one, I'm done). I thought "maybe if I try a different cocktail I can be a "normal" drinker and just have a few in the evening", and then started thinking about what cocktails I could try, until all of a sudden it just hit me..."WHAT ARE YOU DOING???? Normal drinkers do not lie in bed at 5:30 on a Sunday thinking about what cocktails they can drink because they have a problem with wine". Clearly my problem is not just wine, my problem is drinking, period.
I have to accept that and keep a check on those thoughts, it's been easy to convince myself in the past, I can't go there this time.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: fort wayne, IN.
Posts: 1,085
I actually tried that. I was downing Crown Royal every day. I switched to wine because of it's lower alcohol content. I was really stupid. Went form a bottle of whiskey to about 16 glasses of wine a day. Your progress is great. It isn't easy but look what you have accomplished.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 587
your post made me smile. The same thing happened to me. At least you realized it. For me I was actually stupid enough to try and see if I could switch beverages. My thoughts were: hey maybe I am the 1:1000000 that can do it. Of course it did not work....
I loved wine as well and when I was
out if it at home and wasnt able to
get to the store, and the cravings set
in, I reached for what ever was close
at hand. Sherry that I used to cook
with and wasnt my drink of choice.
However, because I needed that drink,
Sherry did the job till my next run to
the store.
Thank God Id don't have to live in that
sanity any longer. Now it's ice cream.
out if it at home and wasnt able to
get to the store, and the cravings set
in, I reached for what ever was close
at hand. Sherry that I used to cook
with and wasnt my drink of choice.
However, because I needed that drink,
Sherry did the job till my next run to
the store.
Thank God Id don't have to live in that
sanity any longer. Now it's ice cream.
The alcoholic brain is totally ridiculous!!
After every hard fought milestone-30, 60,90 days I've been so pleased with myself I've wanted a drink to celebrate......what's that all about?!?x
After every hard fought milestone-30, 60,90 days I've been so pleased with myself I've wanted a drink to celebrate......what's that all about?!?x
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