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Enter the danger zone?..! Day 10!!

Old 11-09-2012, 08:22 AM
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Enter the danger zone?..! Day 10!!

Here it is shhhhhhh.. I've been sober for 10 days straight. Not even one sip of beer. I say shhhhh because when I think about the fact its been 10 days I makes me freakout. Don't get me wrong I am stoked, but I am also scared to mess it up.

Here I am facing my second weekend. I am not even worried about it because I will be working and I will be alone. I live alone and if there is nothing to drink in the house there is nothing to drink. I can face my emotional recovery rollercoaster pretty well on my own... but when I involve anyone else...??

No.. its Monday that I am worried about. Monday begins a week of vacation. Monday I will drive 6 hours to visit my boyfriend (of 4months), who drinks -alot- knowing what I know now I wonder if he may have a drinking problem of his own... I have decided not to say anything about my not drinking, and just not drink and see how it goes. Does that sound like a dumb idea? We are going camping and of course going out and hanging out with all of his friends and family- who all drink-. A lot of uncomfortable situations… a lot of free booze will be available.
My parents are very worried about me going into this situation and with him this early in my recovery, but I feel like what am I supposed to do hide away from the world, break up with him? I just feel like if I don't live my life the way I want -only sober- then I will never be able to face living.

These 10 days of sobriety have given me these 10 awesome things to be happy about...

1. Running the fastest I ever have.
2. Memories I had forgotten
3. Mental clarity to make decisions.
4. Saved a ton of money.
5. Making a goal and finally following through.
6. Time to do things I have always wanted to do.
7. Sleeping without the aid of drinking.
8. Finding knowledge and people on SR.
9. Being honest, mostly with myself.
10. I am not a slave anymore.


Does plunging into the fire next week necessarily mean I am going to get burnt?
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Old 11-09-2012, 08:56 AM
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Hi, Jaceel.

First, congrats on Day 10!

IMHO, this situation does not mean automatically that you are going to fail. But it's a quite a challenge, especially in early sobriety. I think that it won't hurt to make as many back-up plans to stay sober as you can. Does your boyfriend know that you quitted drinking?

Be ready that everyone is going to ask you why you are not drinking, and probably, talking you into having "one glass". Pick some non-alco drink that you are going to have all the time, so you glass is not empty. You may find some useful information here as well:

Mindful Recovery and Relapse Prevention for the Holidays | Mindfulness and Psychotherapy

I wish you great sober vacations! Stay determined - you know that it's worth it.
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Old 11-09-2012, 09:24 AM
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I will say one thing, Jaycee. I went to my SIL house yesterday to walk her dogs. While I was there I found a LOAD of wine, liquor and beer. I was by myself and almost lost to temptation. It was so difficult. I literally stood there over 20 minutes looking at all of it and having a conversation with myself about whether or not I should drink some. I really, truly almost drank a glass of rum, but got a text that second that my SIL finally had her baby. I had to rush to the hospital. It was definitely a sign from above that it all happened with the timing it did.
Remember, this was happening while I was ALONE. I didnt have anyone there to tell me to "go ahead, its free" "its only one" "you'll be fine" "we are on vacation" etc... Today is my day nine and I am SO VERY THANKFUL I didnt not drink anything last night, but my goodness was it so difficult to be in that situation. Emotionally straining.
You may be totally different, but I wanted to share this with you, since we are close to the same amount of days sober.
Good luck and we are all praying for you.
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Old 11-09-2012, 09:34 AM
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If I was to create a top-ten list of things newcomers do to sabotage their recovery, putting themselves in a situation where a lot of drinking is going on and where it's difficult to extricate themselves from the scene would be high on the list.

Vacation or sobriety. They don't have to be mutually exclusive, but the risks of drinking are high if you are around other drinkers. The decision is yours to make.

Good luck.
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Old 11-09-2012, 03:08 PM
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Thank you for the link MidnightBlue, I read the whole article and found it really helpful. I like the thought of slowing down and stepping outside of the reaction/impulse timing to feel and explore what I am thinking/feeling. Its funny because I just was blogging about how I need to face up to my feelings rather then dodging them. Thanks! I have not told him I quit drinking, the relationship is new, I am so nervous.. I am not sure what to do..

Jen31- Thanks that is a good reminder. Being alone can be just as dangerous, right now I have elimated alcohol in my house, but I was almost asked to housesit this weekend and I know their house is full of booze...wanna know what my first thought was when they asked... not about the dogs. I need to remember that its about saying no wherever and whatever the circumstances- in that moment all I need to do is don't take a drink.
Thanks for sharing

doggonecarl- "putting themselves in a situation where a lot of drinking is going on and where it's difficult to extricate themselves" That is something I had not really thought of... Last weekend I left because I could, but I am not so sure i could because I am a guest.. this is something I need to think about. I don't want to cause drama, but I need an exit plan.. Also I thought I might just drink caffeine when everyone else is drinking??
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