4th day sober and thinking of giving up
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Urbana Ohio
Posts: 1
4th day sober and thinking of giving up
Hi all, with the exception of two weeks sobriety seven years ago I have drank every single day. In the last two months my drinking increased to 20-24 cans of beer a day.
Back in the 90's I did manage to put together two years of sobriety, but only because it was court ordered and I was tested 3 times a week. Even during that time, I was totally a dry drunk. I didn't enjoy anything because I had always associated fun with drinking.
Now I am trying this sobriety thing again because when I wake up in the morning I can barely get a drink of water to my mouth for my hands shaking so badly. I also am trying to get a good job.
My doctor has me on Oxazepam 30 mg - 3 times a day and that takes care of the shakes and anxiety, but not the longing to drink beer. Plus my moods are all over the place - one minute I am happy and proud I am doing this and the next I am resentful that I can't do what I want to do, which is drink beer.
Not to mention, nearly everything I do makes me think of beer. Everything is a trigger, good things, bad things, chores, making dinner, writing, etc.
Any suggestions?
Back in the 90's I did manage to put together two years of sobriety, but only because it was court ordered and I was tested 3 times a week. Even during that time, I was totally a dry drunk. I didn't enjoy anything because I had always associated fun with drinking.
Now I am trying this sobriety thing again because when I wake up in the morning I can barely get a drink of water to my mouth for my hands shaking so badly. I also am trying to get a good job.
My doctor has me on Oxazepam 30 mg - 3 times a day and that takes care of the shakes and anxiety, but not the longing to drink beer. Plus my moods are all over the place - one minute I am happy and proud I am doing this and the next I am resentful that I can't do what I want to do, which is drink beer.
Not to mention, nearly everything I do makes me think of beer. Everything is a trigger, good things, bad things, chores, making dinner, writing, etc.
Any suggestions?
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome DinOhio!
I thought about drinking 24/7 at first, too. I spent a LOT of time here, just getting through it 5 or 10 minutes at a time. You have to trade the obsession for alcohol with an obsession for recovery.
The good news is that it gets easier over time. I started to appreciate life again, something I wouldn't have believed would be possible. Before I got sober, I felt like alcohol was the only thing I had to look forward to.
Don't hesitate to get medical help for detox if you need it. Glad you're here - we know what it's like.......
I thought about drinking 24/7 at first, too. I spent a LOT of time here, just getting through it 5 or 10 minutes at a time. You have to trade the obsession for alcohol with an obsession for recovery.
The good news is that it gets easier over time. I started to appreciate life again, something I wouldn't have believed would be possible. Before I got sober, I felt like alcohol was the only thing I had to look forward to.
Don't hesitate to get medical help for detox if you need it. Glad you're here - we know what it's like.......
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
welcome DinOhio 
Don't give up!
4 days is great but it's probably a drop in the bucket to the amount of time you spent drinking
It can take a little time to change our life.
I think supports very important - this place really saved me when I quit after 20 years - I spent most of the first few weeks here.
There's other kinds of support too - AA and a whole raft of non 12 step options too. Are you interested in any of that?
D
Don't give up!
4 days is great but it's probably a drop in the bucket to the amount of time you spent drinking
It can take a little time to change our life.
I think supports very important - this place really saved me when I quit after 20 years - I spent most of the first few weeks here.
There's other kinds of support too - AA and a whole raft of non 12 step options too. Are you interested in any of that?
D
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 11
Hi Dinohio, I'm new also so I don't have any advice, but I'm with you, newly sober, and right now it totally stinks, really hoping it gets easier as I get more sober time. Maybe try to find some new interests, something to keep your mind busy. I've been trying to exercise more. I hope you feel better soon.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: San Diego
Posts: 611
I am with you - the obsession to drink and use is something most of us fight daily, sometimes I have to literally take it minute by minute.
Do not give up. There is life without alcohol. I once had almost a year sober and I can't figure out why I let that go for a few crappy Vicodin pills... I was so happy back then and this was after many years of (like you describe) feeling like I could only be miserable and "dry" as they say.
What works for me is support groups like this one, AA, or smart recovery, whatever tools you can use and also replace the old life with a new, more meaningful life HELPING OTHERS and finding out what you are passionate about! What did you enjoy doing as a kid? What were your dreams? Hobbies? Interests?
Keep going. I'm new too and I know we can
Both do this ok? Here for you.
Do not give up. There is life without alcohol. I once had almost a year sober and I can't figure out why I let that go for a few crappy Vicodin pills... I was so happy back then and this was after many years of (like you describe) feeling like I could only be miserable and "dry" as they say.
What works for me is support groups like this one, AA, or smart recovery, whatever tools you can use and also replace the old life with a new, more meaningful life HELPING OTHERS and finding out what you are passionate about! What did you enjoy doing as a kid? What were your dreams? Hobbies? Interests?
Keep going. I'm new too and I know we can
Both do this ok? Here for you.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 249
DinOhio,
You should get yourself to an AA meeting. You won't be able to fight this by yourself. You need to seek help. I've only been sober for as long as I have because of AA. When I tried to quit by myself, I only lasted 15 days before I gave up and went back to drinking. It sounds like you want to quit. AA will welcome you with open arms.
You should get yourself to an AA meeting. You won't be able to fight this by yourself. You need to seek help. I've only been sober for as long as I have because of AA. When I tried to quit by myself, I only lasted 15 days before I gave up and went back to drinking. It sounds like you want to quit. AA will welcome you with open arms.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,044
DinOhio,
I am on day 22 and it is starting to get easier. I am very grateful for this site, I have been reading and posting daily and it has helped me stay sober. I am also reading and exercising a lot. Finally, I am working with my insurance and attending classes and counseling. I went to two AA meetings and the people were great, but feel like the Women For Sobriety group is a better fit for me.
Keep posting and reading.
I am on day 22 and it is starting to get easier. I am very grateful for this site, I have been reading and posting daily and it has helped me stay sober. I am also reading and exercising a lot. Finally, I am working with my insurance and attending classes and counseling. I went to two AA meetings and the people were great, but feel like the Women For Sobriety group is a better fit for me.
Keep posting and reading.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Middle of no where, oklahoma
Posts: 2,696
when I first got sober I couldn't imagine a life without drinking and drinking was all I could think of. SR was a lifesaver for me, I spent every spare moment I had on here. There are a lot of great people on here who have managed to do what I thought impossible.
As the fog began to lift I found life. A life I could not have imagined. It's not been easy but it is so worth it.
Take it minute by minute if need be and stick around.
You're worth it
As the fog began to lift I found life. A life I could not have imagined. It's not been easy but it is so worth it.
Take it minute by minute if need be and stick around.
You're worth it
Four days sober is a good start on a better life, don't give up now!Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 1,126
Congrats on the days sober. The benzo you are on is said to have good results fighting alcohol withdrawals, but I hope your doctor doesn't keep you on it too long and weans you off sooner than later.
Benzos did me in, on top of being an alcoholic. Sorry for the negativity, but doctors seem to only too willingly keep people on a benzo for months, long enough to become quite addicted and enter into a new kind of hell. The makers of every benzo I know include warnings on labeling that their own products should only be taken for a few weeks. Please don't interpret this as medical advice, but just a suggestion to talk to your doctor about it.
I strongly urge you to check out some meetings to deal with those cravings and get some face-to-face support. I suspect (your dry drunk comment) that you're no strangers to the rooms?
Benzos did me in, on top of being an alcoholic. Sorry for the negativity, but doctors seem to only too willingly keep people on a benzo for months, long enough to become quite addicted and enter into a new kind of hell. The makers of every benzo I know include warnings on labeling that their own products should only be taken for a few weeks. Please don't interpret this as medical advice, but just a suggestion to talk to your doctor about it.
I strongly urge you to check out some meetings to deal with those cravings and get some face-to-face support. I suspect (your dry drunk comment) that you're no strangers to the rooms?
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Home - there's no place like Home
Posts: 974
Congratulations on making a great decision to improve your life. There is a whole entire world waiting for you sober. You can do this, don't stop believing in yourself and abilities. Help is everywhere - power through and keep feeling proud of your success. You need not live in alcohell any longer. Welcome to SR!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: fort wayne, IN.
Posts: 1,085
I felt like you a couple of weeks ago. It really does quiet down. I drank every day for 4 years. I had 5 years sobriety prior to that. I have quit drinking 3 times in my life. This last time has been the hardest. It is not as maddening now as it was. I like being sober.
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