Synfull Vyxun

Well my aunty has said she will lend me some money to get a flight home, I feel like a small weight has been lifted off my shoulders, now to sort out, How I am going to tell my mother, how do I deal with the guilt trips she will give me? etc etc.
I dunno, but I do know I will be home soon. I am literally shaking and crying, I am so happy right now. Mother is going on a first date with one of her random men in a couple of days, and staying the night with him. I am disgusted, the way she brought me up, that's not the way to get respect!! She has changed so much, her morals and self respect have gone down the drain.
I can't wait to see my family and true friends again, I need the biggest cuddles, and I don't do cuddles anymore!!! Possibly because I feel I have no one that loves and cares for me, and I don't want sympathy, my dad gave me the first hug in years, a couple of weeks ago, and it felt so nice.
I really don't want to leave him here but I know he will be OK and he understands that I need to go home.
I reckon he may even join me as it is his home country as well. It will be good for him if I do go, as then the mother will not be ringing him whingeing about me and telling him what to do with his life, then being so two faced and bitching about him to people here in the pub, I have heard it with my own ears, She has no loyalty to anyone or anything except her manipulative alcoholic best friend and cider. Not even her animals or only child!!!! Dad will not have to come up every other weekend and end up involved in an argument, I will not dread answering the phone to him in fear of what story she has made up in her head about me now. I can finally get on with my father without her interfering.
So I guess I am outta here, thank god. Finally I can make my life what I want to, as only I can do it.

Kialua

That is great! How soon will you be going? Don't let any false guilt take over before you leave. She may need this as one of her many 'wake up calls'.

Don't worry about how to tell your Mom. Wait till the last possible moment and call her from way inside the airport. These days no one can get in past security so she will not be able to cause a scene.

Better yet leave a note that you are gone "visiting" and then call her from your first stop or once you get home.

And don't forget about the phone number idea you got on that other thread. I went through many years of turning the phone ringer off and putting on a recorder so I wouldn't get any calls.

I'm so excited for you! You can do this. Keep reading all your books and get ready for the rest of your life.

Mracoa

Good for you. And you don't really owe her any explanation, and based on the history I recommend giving no early warning. Just pack your bags and leave. You can write a note and pin it to the door if you don't want her to worry about you.

Early warning is just inviting her to try and guilt you out of going, or worse, trying to contact your aunt to ask her not to send you the money. Protect yourself, and keep it on the down low until you are safely back home.

Kialua

Yes, I didn't even think of that, don't let her know so she won't be calling the Aunt. Good advice MrThekla!

Synfull Vyxun

she doesn't keep in contact with my dad's side of the family, but I'm sure she would ring my father and whinge to him, to try get him to stop me, then she would give me grief. So I am not going to tell her till very last minute. I am keeping the books by my side.
I'm hoping it will be the next couple of weeks, I cannot stand another Christmas like the last few. I don't think I can live with her much longer before I do something stupid I will regret, so it needs to be asap, I'm getting my head round this fact, I keep thinking what if this happens, what if that happens, I write it down and ponder for awhile, I am coming to terms with it all and I am moving on.
Thanks guys. I did have an idea years ago, when I felt like this, that I should just run and ring her from the airport on the other side and ask her to look after my cat, but I couldn't bring myself to leave her in the state she was in then, now I am passed caring as she no longer cares for herself.
I sent a text to my father recently and said how my mother had not had a bath in 2 weeks and stunk of cider oozing out of her skin, but accidentally text it to the A mother, she went mental at me, but she baths more now!!! So maybe I will text from home and then destroy the simcard, so she cant contact me, and I will look into the other sim voicemail number thing, thanks for the reminder, will do it now.

tromboneliness

Excellent! When my sister left home, she told my Dad at the last possible moment, too -- as she was getting out of the car when he dropped her off at work!

There is no obligation to explain. The person is not going to get it anyway, and they'll just get mad, make a scene, manipulate, whatever. If all else fails, I was going to suggest just getting on the plane, then calling from Australia!

T