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Disaster-type stuff is so triggering to me

Old 10-29-2012, 05:53 AM
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Disaster-type stuff is so triggering to me

Nothing really makes me want to drink anymore really but it just makes me remember drinking because a big storm was always a great excuse to start drinking early. I mean obviously as I'm sober now I see that being drunk in a disaster-type situation is up there with the stupidest things I've done as a parent. But that's how my mind worked at the time.

And now all across my FB feed is like "screw bread and milk - I'm going to get some wine!". And graphics replacing the inches of rain predictions with bottles of wine suggestion. etc etc.

It just all seems so dumb to me. And I can see now that these people posting it can LOLZ about it and then move on. But when I was drinking I'd take it as confirmation that every other person with young kids was ACTUALLY half in the bag by noon.

I will confess though. That it's not quite 9am here and I've had 3 cups of coffee and 2 slices of apple pie

Stay safe everyone!
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Old 10-29-2012, 06:13 AM
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I have never tought about wine during a disaster, but have drank during personal disaster, either way it's a recipe for disaster! Praying that the storm passes with little damage!
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Old 10-29-2012, 06:20 AM
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I know how you feel, SS. For too long the only emergency supplies I would buy for a storm would be beer and ice.

Sandy is my second sober hurricane. I actually feel prepared for a change.
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Old 10-29-2012, 06:23 AM
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I thought about getting some weed. It was a thought. That was on Friday. I work with some children who have emotional disorders and who can be quite explosive. I thought it through a bit and realized I just wanted all of my emotions to disappear for a while.

I don't need to open a can of worms, even though the way I thought about this was "just a little wouldn't hurt." Of course it will hurt me! Pandora's box would be opened and I wouldn't be the happy person I am today. It would just mess up everything I've done in the last year or so.

I'm not willing to give that up.

Stay strong, stay stopped, do something you've wanted to do for you but never found the time to do.

I'm sitting here waiting on the wind to pick up (around noon today) and no work (closed, everything is closed including all mass transit which I refer to as "My Limo Ride") and don't have to return to work until Wednesday.....

I guess I'll go put some laundry in as long as I have electricity.....

....and play some more of my computer game, we have double experience points until noon today (yes, I AM older, but that game is fun!!)

I can't drink. I can't smoke weed. It's just how it is today. And I will stay happier than I was when I was stuck on that horrible cycle of drinking and wasting my mind! You can get through this, sober!!!
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Old 10-29-2012, 06:35 AM
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I was asked what my tiggers were, "I said breathing" I could always find a reason to drink
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