Why can't I just have 1!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Mo
Posts: 39
Why can't I just have 1!!
I'm a newly single mom of 5 kids. My husband left because he was cheating on me. I find myself depressed even more than before. I don't drink everyday, he get the kids 2xs a week. So, when I don't have my kids...I drink. I tell myself, "only 1 glass of wine" but before I know it I've polished off 2 bottles. I know this is binge drinking. But I'm not satisfied have 1 glass. Anyone else feel like this? How did you deal with the excessive drinking? Thanks for any help!
Euphoric Recaller
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: PHX Suburbs
Posts: 371
I tried to moderate my drinking. I tried to keep it to "just a couple beers". No ideas I came up with helped me at all. My drinking got worse and worse and worse till it was far worse than I ever thought possible. I had to give up any thoughts of drinking "just 1". I joined a program of recovery and have been sober ever since.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Mo
Posts: 39
I'm thinking I may need help. My family is concerned about me. Plus the choices of people I've been hanging are not good. I believe I was slipped something in my drink this past Friday. Don't remember anything. Burned my hand in a Bon fire and fell off my deck. I could have gotten very badly injured! I'm so mad at myself.
Recovered from Hopeless State
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: New Jersey, USA
Posts: 2,156
My wife and I were in a similar situation. We shared 3 kids after we seperated and I moved in with someone else. I came to realize later that we were both alcoholics although she was more active than me at the time of our seperation. Things changed, not long after I moved out, and I became much more active.
The state ended up taking our kids for over a year and they lived with their aunt and uncle nearby for that period.
She passed away about 2 years ago, mostly from our other addiction, cigarettes. She was 51. I had moved back to our house about a year before that and she went to rehab for a few months. Now it's me and the kids and I don't want to drink. I'm here and went to my first AA meeting in 3 years tonight. That's how I'm dealing with my excessive drinking. Not drinking and helping others help me. I KNOW I can't have even 1 drink. It will kill me, more sooner than later in my case.
The state ended up taking our kids for over a year and they lived with their aunt and uncle nearby for that period.
She passed away about 2 years ago, mostly from our other addiction, cigarettes. She was 51. I had moved back to our house about a year before that and she went to rehab for a few months. Now it's me and the kids and I don't want to drink. I'm here and went to my first AA meeting in 3 years tonight. That's how I'm dealing with my excessive drinking. Not drinking and helping others help me. I KNOW I can't have even 1 drink. It will kill me, more sooner than later in my case.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Mo
Posts: 39
dSober~ thank you for sharing that with me. I realize even thought don't drink everyday, I still have a problem. The amount I can drink is crazy. Last thing I want is my children to be taken away.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,385
Hi and welcome Lab 
I found drinking was the worst thing I could have done for my depression. It turned a fairly small problem into a huge great one lasting decades.
By turning to booze so often, I eventually lost the ability to have 'just one' - seems like you might be the same?
There's better, healthier ways to deal with stress, loss, and depression.
There is a better life - there's hundreds of us here to prove it
I'm really glad you've joined us
D
I found drinking was the worst thing I could have done for my depression. It turned a fairly small problem into a huge great one lasting decades.
By turning to booze so often, I eventually lost the ability to have 'just one' - seems like you might be the same?
There's better, healthier ways to deal with stress, loss, and depression.
There is a better life - there's hundreds of us here to prove it
I'm really glad you've joined us
D
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Mo
Posts: 39
Thank you all for responding. I know I have a drinking problem....it's only when I don't have my kids. I feel like I'm free to do whatever I want and not think about the negative outcome. As for the depression...I know it doesn't help cuz for the next few days after drinking I'm in a pissed off mood and want to cry. Guess I thought drinking twice wasn't bad....boy was I wrong.
Recovered from Hopeless State
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: New Jersey, USA
Posts: 2,156
Lab, I've drank up to 1/2 gal. 80 proof. per day, for days/weeks on end. Guess what happens when you stop. Hint: I've made several unplanned visits to the hospital via ambulance. I usually "came to" in the amulance saying I'm ok, take me home. Nobody was interested in anything I had to say, duh.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Here, Now
Posts: 4,268
It is hard when I decided to just have one I bought a wine glass that could hold a bottle then I thought well one more won't hurt. Just can't do it. Remember when one of my step kids said he wished his mom never married an alcoholic that was a heart breaker
Recovered from Hopeless State
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: New Jersey, USA
Posts: 2,156
You've just completed AA Step 1 Lab: "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol--- that our lives had become unmanagable"
- Quoted directly from the Big Book, it's on my lap right now.
- Quoted directly from the Big Book, it's on my lap right now.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Mo
Posts: 39
That's what I want to avoid....it getting to the point where I need medical attention. And my stupid falling off decks and getting burned isn't helping. Plus the drinking has gotten me started sleeping around. I am so disgusted in myself over all of this. This drunk person is not who I am. Im so ashamed.
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