Not tryin' to make him go to rehab...
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 602
Not tryin' to make him go to rehab...
Hi everyone,
The thread title's supposed to be an Amy Winehouse reference, or something.
So I am with dear old AH still. He was committed to a treatment programme, and was in this training to be one of the self-help group leaders.
Then about a month ago he had a setback with a community group he's in (and seriously, it was a minor deal) and decided to binge again. So the last month I've been living with a whiny demanding filthy priapic 200-pound toddler. Good times!
Why haven't I moved out? Honestly, I don't know. Hope springs eternal. Also I've been really busy at work (new grant).
Now, last time AH was in this situation, I did a ton of work to help him find medically supervised detox. You could probably have a read if you like, I posted about it here. NHS put a ton of barriers up, I researched that ad nauseum and canvassed all the nearby private detox places too.
Last week AH asked me to help him get into medically supervised detox and I said, "No. You have the info you need. Make a move and if there's something specific you need like a ride, then let me know."
To my surprise, he's checked himself into a private detox place (one of the ones I found whilst researching for him before) and has paid a deposit. If he can keep himself together tomorrow, he'll go to his building society and transfer some funds from his savings to pay for the rest of it, and then on Tuesday I'll drive him there. (It's about an hour away.)
Now, I'm still not convinced he'll make it there. There was a lot of whining tonight about how he's putting himself in "prison" and how he'll probably die there.
At some point tonight he was somewhat lucid so I said, "You probably won't die there. You'll feel better and then come home and then what?"
He said the man at the rehab centre had said something similar, lol.
He can't have a laptop or a mobile whilst he's there. I asked him whether he could have visitors and he said he didn't know (?). I'm hoping no. I can't imagine making a two-hour drive after work each evening to watch him whine in his private suite.
Do I sound done? I think I am.
The thread title's supposed to be an Amy Winehouse reference, or something.
So I am with dear old AH still. He was committed to a treatment programme, and was in this training to be one of the self-help group leaders.
Then about a month ago he had a setback with a community group he's in (and seriously, it was a minor deal) and decided to binge again. So the last month I've been living with a whiny demanding filthy priapic 200-pound toddler. Good times!
Why haven't I moved out? Honestly, I don't know. Hope springs eternal. Also I've been really busy at work (new grant).
Now, last time AH was in this situation, I did a ton of work to help him find medically supervised detox. You could probably have a read if you like, I posted about it here. NHS put a ton of barriers up, I researched that ad nauseum and canvassed all the nearby private detox places too.
Last week AH asked me to help him get into medically supervised detox and I said, "No. You have the info you need. Make a move and if there's something specific you need like a ride, then let me know."
To my surprise, he's checked himself into a private detox place (one of the ones I found whilst researching for him before) and has paid a deposit. If he can keep himself together tomorrow, he'll go to his building society and transfer some funds from his savings to pay for the rest of it, and then on Tuesday I'll drive him there. (It's about an hour away.)
Now, I'm still not convinced he'll make it there. There was a lot of whining tonight about how he's putting himself in "prison" and how he'll probably die there.
At some point tonight he was somewhat lucid so I said, "You probably won't die there. You'll feel better and then come home and then what?"
He said the man at the rehab centre had said something similar, lol.
He can't have a laptop or a mobile whilst he's there. I asked him whether he could have visitors and he said he didn't know (?). I'm hoping no. I can't imagine making a two-hour drive after work each evening to watch him whine in his private suite.
Do I sound done? I think I am.
peaceful seabird
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: floating
Posts: 4,822
Wow! Your recovery is showing and it looks marvelous from this side of the screen!
About this:
Give yourself permission to take a much needed break from King Baby.
About this:
Originally Posted by akrasia 
I can't imagine making a two-hour drive after work each evening to watch him whine in his private suite.
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
"He can't have a laptop or a mobile whilst he's there. I asked him whether he could have visitors and he said he didn't know (?). I'm hoping no. I can't imagine making a two-hour drive after work each evening to watch him whine in his private suite."
This is his deal, there will be plenty of people their to support him, why would you even consider driving 2 hours each evening? Me? Once a week, maybe, only IF he were to behave while I am there. This is not his first rodeo.
Take this time to work on you, this has been going on for a very long time, might be time to find yourself and determine why you stay and keep putting up with all the drama.
There is a reason.
My best.
This is his deal, there will be plenty of people their to support him, why would you even consider driving 2 hours each evening? Me? Once a week, maybe, only IF he were to behave while I am there. This is not his first rodeo.
Take this time to work on you, this has been going on for a very long time, might be time to find yourself and determine why you stay and keep putting up with all the drama.
There is a reason.
My best.
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