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Horrible drunken cow!

Old 09-16-2012, 01:30 AM
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Horrible drunken cow!

I am almost 30 and have decided I need to quit drinking. It doesn't suit me. I have drunk driven dangerously, am blacking out, am obnoxious arguing with my boyfriend.. put myself in dangerous positions..

.. plus I have put a couple of stone on in weight!

I quit drinking Thursday night! Well, I was drunk Thursday night.. but have spent Friday and Saturday sober!

I am determined to stay sober now.

I wouldn't like to say I am an alcoholic, but then I am probably kidding myself! Everyone around me drinks, which makes it harder.. people say drink in moderation.. but I can't. I drink, and drink.. and drink! Once I have started I just can't stop.

So, here I am.

Tired out, I always stop drinking and am exhausted.... plus crave sugar so bad to replace the Wine/Beer!

It takes a few weeks to feel better and determination.. but it's so tempting to drink again when it's everywhere!
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Old 09-16-2012, 01:42 AM
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Welcome to SR Sugarfix

It certainly seems like alcohol is everywhere when you first quit. That was my overwhelming impression too. I had built a life for myself around alcohol... I have a lot of big drinking friends and colleagues and my family were always big drinkers. But when I quit and 'came out' to my family, suddenly they all quit or seriously cut back too! And when I went to see some old friends they really wanted to drink but didn't because I wasn't. I started to realise that they all used me as an excuse to drink as much as I used them.

That said though, it is really tough to be around it early on so could you minimise you contact with alcohol...? I found it best for me to stop going out for a bit until I was more comfortable sober, and also, I was exhausted too so having a bit of down time to recover is probably the best plan.

Have you looked into getting support too? It helps to have other people around who know what you're going through.

Glad you're here x
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Old 09-16-2012, 01:42 AM
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Welcome sugarfix! Glad you had sober day today, keep it up!
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Old 09-16-2012, 01:48 AM
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Originally Posted by hypochondriac View Post
Welcome to SR Sugarfix

It certainly seems like alcohol is everywhere when you first quit. That was my overwhelming impression too. I had built a life for myself around alcohol... I have a lot of big drinking friends and colleagues and my family were always big drinkers. But when I quit and 'came out' to my family, suddenly they all quit or seriously cut back too! And when I went to see some old friends they really wanted to drink but didn't because I wasn't. I started to realise that they all used me as an excuse to drink as much as I used them.

That said though, it is really tough to be around it early on so could you minimise you contact with alcohol...? I found it best for me to stop going out for a bit until I was more comfortable sober, and also, I was exhausted too so having a bit of down time to recover is probably the best plan.

Have you looked into getting support too? It helps to have other people around who know what you're going through.

Glad you're here x
Thank you

If I say I am not drinking, my friends ask me if I have banged my head! My housemates offer me beer... I usually cave in! I will be living alone again very soon and so there wont be any alcohol in the house, but my housemate is an alcoholic too (though he doesnt think he is!)...

.. I wont be going out anywhere now until Christmas that serves alcohol and will be avoiding it as much as possible. Summer is always a tough one because everyone lives in the pretty beer gardens! But summer is over now.. and just Christmas to get through!

I despise the drinking, hate myself for doing it and wake up every day feeling guilt and shame for doing it!

It's easy to just pick up another drink and say 'I'm not a real alcholic, it's fine. I can drink this and none the next day' - but it doesn;t work like that at all!

Time to stop kidding myself
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Old 09-16-2012, 01:51 AM
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Dear Sugarfix,

you sound as though you know exactly what you want and what to do :> Brilliant.

As for sugar cravings instead of sweets etc, try mangos and dates as they are full of natural sugars with lots of great vitamins too.

Look forward to seeing your progress.
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Old 09-16-2012, 01:55 AM
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Originally Posted by Vall View Post
Dear Sugarfix,

you sound as though you know exactly what you want and what to do :> Brilliant.

As for sugar cravings instead of sweets etc, try mangos and dates as they are full of natural sugars with lots of great vitamins too.

Look forward to seeing your progress.
I am taking lots of food supplements and trying to eat sandwiches instead

I am going to check in here daily and read positive stories to help me

I have never had any willpower!
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Old 09-16-2012, 01:58 AM
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Originally Posted by Sugarfix
I can drink this and none the next day' - but it doesn;t work like that at all!
Haha, no it doesn't does it!

I've had a few people giving me a hard time for quitting but the longer I ignore them the easier it gets Now it barely bothers me. And I did have to practice saying 'no thank you' whenever I knew I would be in a situation where someone would offer me a drink... it's so hard to get out of the habit of saying 'yes please'! That might sound silly but people do slip because they don't know what to say when someone offers them a drink (No, thankyou, no thankyou...) x

I'd highly recommend joining the 'Class of September' thread here x
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Old 09-16-2012, 02:11 AM
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Welcome to SR Sugarfix....First of all...Take it easy on yourself....We aren't bad people....We are good people with a bad problem...A problem that is progressive so the sooner you get a handle on it the better. I use the Program of Alcoholics Anonymous and I've gone from a hopless drunk to almost 15 months without a drink. It asks two yes or no questions in the big book that I had to look in the mirror and honestly answer....

If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking, you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic.

Can I stop drinking on my own?....entirely meaning completely.
Or
Once I start....Can I control the amount I drink?

Notice the word probably....I had to honestly answer that question to that person in the mirror myself....I am an alcoholic....Right now a recovered alcoholic. Try something different....Go to an AA meeting and see if you relate to it....Try a couple. The first one I went to I knew I was home. You can read the Big book and listen to some audio tapes on this site....You never know...It could be the answer for you.

Welcome to Silkworth.net -Alcoholics Anonymous . . . experience the history . . . lest we forget!
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Old 09-16-2012, 02:11 AM
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Welcome to the family! You've come to a great place for support from people who understand.
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Old 09-16-2012, 02:23 AM
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Originally Posted by hypochondriac View Post
Haha, no it doesn't does it!

I've had a few people giving me a hard time for quitting but the longer I ignore them the easier it gets Now it barely bothers me. And I did have to practice saying 'no thank you' whenever I knew I would be in a situation where someone would offer me a drink... it's so hard to get out of the habit of saying 'yes please'! That might sound silly but people do slip because they don't know what to say when someone offers them a drink (No, thankyou, no thankyou...) x

I'd highly recommend joining the 'Class of September' thread here x
It's definitely easier to say 'oh go on then, just the one then' instead of 'no thanks' but it's doing that, that makes it all start over again!

I honestly think that everyone I know who drinks alot is an alcoholic! The evening Wine drinkers think they are more civilised than the beer and shot drinkers though haha! (in my circle anyway, am not denigrating Wine drinkers sober or not) 'I only drink Wine at night to relax' - yeah, didn't we all

Where will I find that thread?

Originally Posted by Sapling View Post
Welcome to SR Sugarfix....First of all...Take it easy on yourself....We aren't bad people....We are good people with a bad problem...A problem that is progressive so the sooner you get a handle on it the better. I use the Program of Alcoholics Anonymous and I've gone from a hopless drunk to almost 15 months without a drink. It asks two yes or no questions in the big book that I had to look in the mirror and honestly answer....

If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking, you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic.

Can I stop drinking on my own?....entirely meaning completely.
Or
Once I start....Can I control the amount I drink?

Notice the word probably....I had to honestly answer that question to that person in the mirror myself....I am an alcoholic....Right now a recovered alcoholic. Try something different....Go to an AA meeting and see if you relate to it....Try a couple. The first one I went to I knew I was home. You can read the Big book and listen to some audio tapes on this site....You never know...It could be the answer for you.
Well done you! 15 months is a long time! I only managed that length of time when pregnant! Think my longest is a year.

I binge drink for months then quit, then back on it. Then quit again. That doesn't make mean I have any less of a drink problem than anyone else though.. it just means I have a very unhealthy relationship with alcohol! :/

I might think about an AA meeting, have joked about it in the past.. but it's close to what I think I need right now!
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Old 09-16-2012, 02:29 AM
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Originally Posted by Sugarfix View Post
I might think about an AA meeting, have joked about it in the past.. but it's close to what I think I need right now!
I used to joke about it too.....Not any more....Saved my fricken life....You can meet some great people there too....People just like you. Welcome to the site...Glad you are here.
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Old 09-16-2012, 02:31 AM
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Originally Posted by Sapling View Post
I used to joke about it too.....Not any more....Saved my fricken life....You can meet some great people there too....People just like you. Welcome to the site...Glad you are here.

I thihnk all heavy drinkers joke about it.. though have always thought in my head.. that sounds like a good idea!

Is it all religious though?
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Old 09-16-2012, 02:36 AM
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I'm not religious at all...Spritual yes...I believe I'm not the center of the universe....And I know what I don't know and I admit it. LOL

Take a look at this site...It will answer all your questions about going to a meeting....It sure can't hurt you sugarfix....Just watch out for the free donuts and coffee.

Your First AA Meeting<
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Old 09-16-2012, 02:38 AM
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Originally Posted by Sapling View Post
I'm not religious at all...Spritual yes...I believe I'm not the center of the universe....And I know what I don't know and I admit it. LOL

Take a look at this site...It will answer all your questions about going to a meeting....It sure can't hurt you sugarfix....Just watch out for the free donuts and coffee.
I am spiritual also, just not religious. I believe there are higher powers than us, just can't explain my views on a God or praying to a God.. if that makes sense!

Thank you. I will look at that.

I owe it to my children to remain sober. And with two alcoholic parents.. (mine, not theirs) .. I should know better!

Damn! Donuts and coffee... they might keep me going back
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Old 09-16-2012, 02:44 AM
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Originally Posted by Sugarfix View Post
I am spiritual also, just not religious. I believe there are higher powers than us, just can't explain my views on a God or praying to a God.. if that makes sense!
That's all you need...It's a God of your understanding and everyone's is different....You just need an open mind....All it takes to be a member is a desire to stop drinking....That's it.
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Old 09-16-2012, 04:16 AM
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Welcome to SR! After nearly 30 years of drinking, I'd finally had enough. Quitting was the best thing I ever did. By all means, check out AA; there's also lots of other options out there these days. The bottom line is we can and do recover. I wish you well.
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Old 09-16-2012, 04:37 AM
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Originally Posted by Sugarfix View Post
Thank you

If I say I am not drinking, my friends ask me if I have banged my head! My housemates offer me beer... I usually cave in!
Welcome to the site, I am glad you are here

The particular bit I have quoted, interested me. It worries me how people don't take alcohol seriously, people think if you're not drinking on a night out there is something wrong with you. I don't know how it is in America for the American posters on here but in the UK I would say there is a massive problem with alcohol and the crux of it is because the idea that it should be the centre and/or the main reason of social activity has been engrained into people's mindsets, in my opinion. There needs to be a complete attitude change here, many people could save themselves a load of trouble if we just treated alcohol with more respect and didn't act like it is safe because it is legal. People forget that's it's a hard drug. Again this is just my opinion.

Sorry for the rant

Good luck in staying sober, many of us in similar positions on this board.
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Old 09-16-2012, 05:20 AM
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Originally Posted by Martin1 View Post
Welcome to the site, I am glad you are here

The particular bit I have quoted, interested me. It worries me how people don't take alcohol seriously, people think if you're not drinking on a night out there is something wrong with you. I don't know how it is in America for the American posters on here but in the UK I would say there is a massive problem with alcohol and the crux of it is because the idea that it should be the centre and/or the main reason of social activity has been engrained into people's mindsets, in my opinion. There needs to be a complete attitude change here, many people could save themselves a load of trouble if we just treated alcohol with more respect and didn't act like it is safe because it is legal. People forget that's it's a hard drug. Again this is just my opinion.

Sorry for the rant

Good luck in staying sober, many of us in similar positions on this board.

It is definitely not being taken seriously enough. I have quite a few friends, and alot of acquaintances.. and every day on Facebook you see the hangover status'.. the 'never drinking again' status... the 'yay its Friday, time to get wrecked' status'. The mindset seems to be... the weekend is for getting drunk.

Lots of people are battling with alcoholism but don't even realise it.

People drink from boredom. You go for a meal, you drink. You go the pub, to drink. You go to parties, BBQ's , charity events, football events, everything has alcohol! Even the churches dish out Wine (am joking)

And I saw the funniest picture on facebook this morning.... was a lad who was holding a beer but naked from the waist down, and his friend was holding his penis!!!! It was tiny and there were 40 comments on how tiny it was, how it must be cold.... lots of comments laughing!! That lad will have sobered up this morning and been absolutely mortified!!

Also, people drink every night and say it's to 'relax' - this is justified to them. But you don't need alcohol to relax.

In my opinion, my body starts to crave alcohol around the same time every night because that is what time I have got used to having a drink... which is what keeps me drinking.

I feel anxious at the moment, though I have just had a cigarette whilst wearing a nicotine patch (doh!).. so am going to have a bath and keep telling myself it will all be better tomorrow.. I tell myself this every day!

The UK needs to wise up and adopt a more sensible attitude to drinking before it's way too late. No wonder they call it Boozy Britain!
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Old 09-16-2012, 05:34 AM
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Sugarfix, I decided that I needed to control my drinking too. I did control it, perfectly and absolutely. I never have one, not a sip, not a taste. Nothing. I came to the point where I shut the door, I took it off the table, realized that I can never have another drink. Never.

You can choose to do this too. 'But just one, there's no harm, I deserve it, I could really use a drink now, I don't really have a problem, I don't want to insult my host or friends, I can control my drinking and moderate it'. Blah blah blah blah. Recognize these thoughts for what they are - your addiction urge trying to get you to drink. The urge only has the power that you choose to give it through your conscious choice. You aren't sleepwalking after all when you pick up that glass.

You can choose to stop drinking, and stop drinking. You really can. Keep posting here, Sugarfix. There is a lot of support for you here.
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Old 09-16-2012, 05:45 AM
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Originally Posted by Sugarfix View Post
It is definitely not being taken seriously enough. I have quite a few friends, and alot of acquaintances.. and every day on Facebook you see the hangover status'.. the 'never drinking again' status... the 'yay its Friday, time to get wrecked' status'. The mindset seems to be... the weekend is for getting drunk.

Lots of people are battling with alcoholism but don't even realise it.

People drink from boredom. You go for a meal, you drink. You go the pub, to drink. You go to parties, BBQ's , charity events, football events, everything has alcohol! Even the churches dish out Wine (am joking)

And I saw the funniest picture on facebook this morning.... was a lad who was holding a beer but naked from the waist down, and his friend was holding his penis!!!! It was tiny and there were 40 comments on how tiny it was, how it must be cold.... lots of comments laughing!! That lad will have sobered up this morning and been absolutely mortified!!

Also, people drink every night and say it's to 'relax' - this is justified to them. But you don't need alcohol to relax.

In my opinion, my body starts to crave alcohol around the same time every night because that is what time I have got used to having a drink... which is what keeps me drinking.

I feel anxious at the moment, though I have just had a cigarette whilst wearing a nicotine patch (doh!).. so am going to have a bath and keep telling myself it will all be better tomorrow.. I tell myself this every day!

The UK needs to wise up and adopt a more sensible attitude to drinking before it's way too late. No wonder they call it Boozy Britain!
Yep, I know exactly what you're talking about on Facebook. Then you just get lots of people egging them on and calling them a legend. It's so depressing.
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