new and giving it a go
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 8
new and giving it a go
I never thought in my life I would write something like this. I am hurting myself and my beloved family. Last night was the worst I have been and I'm ashamed at my behaviour and hurting everyone and not to mention the cost and finaical strugle. I have tried cutting down once before but old habits die hard and it just keeps coming back. This time I will not cut back I will stop, stop hurting my family and stop hurting myself. I will amend the relationship I have and better myself.
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,469
Hi and Welcome,
I'm so glad you have decided to live a sober life. It's true that we cause ourselves and our families so much pain in addiction. We do understand how hard this is and please know that you will find support here.
I'm so glad you have decided to live a sober life. It's true that we cause ourselves and our families so much pain in addiction. We do understand how hard this is and please know that you will find support here.
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome to the forum, J1981!
Cutting back never worked for me either - at least not for very long. I always ended up worse than before. I don't think any of us here could have predicted what would happen once they started drinking, so don't be too hard on yourself!
Glad you're getting sober!
Cutting back never worked for me either - at least not for very long. I always ended up worse than before. I don't think any of us here could have predicted what would happen once they started drinking, so don't be too hard on yourself!
Glad you're getting sober!
Awaiting Email Confirmation
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: New England
Posts: 604
Welcome J1981 glad you found your way here. Yeah, cutting back doesn't work for most of us-too bad because it sounds like such a nice plan. A plan that lets us keep drinking and having fun, a plan that makes us feel we're "normal"...too bad it's a fantasy plan. The reality is no fun at all. You may be surprised to find that it's often easier to have none than one. Good luck!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,526
Hello J1981. It's wonderful to have you here with us.
I had to make that same decision. I was destroying my relationships, and drinking was becoming dangerous. I never knew what would happen once I took that first drink. All the willpower I could summon up never did a thing to stop me. I had to kick it out of my life completely.
You sound determined to do this - we are happy to help. Congratulations on this wise decision.
I had to make that same decision. I was destroying my relationships, and drinking was becoming dangerous. I never knew what would happen once I took that first drink. All the willpower I could summon up never did a thing to stop me. I had to kick it out of my life completely.
You sound determined to do this - we are happy to help. Congratulations on this wise decision.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 8
Thankyou all so much! I have such a wonderful family and my husband is very understanding. I've nearly destroyed our relationship and I don't think he quite understands. I've gotten so agressive when I drink now to the point where I am ashamed and I told him this morning on the phone in tears that I need to stop. he said not to have as much as I did last night, I agreed but it's more the fact I can't when I start. I went home for lunch to spend some time with him and worked things out. Makes me feel so much better and feel I'm free already!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
Originally Posted by J1981 
I told him this morning on the phone in tears that I need to stop. he said not to have as much as I did last night, I agreed but it's more the fact I can't when I start.
Welcome to SR J1981
I'm sure you'll find lots of support here x
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Cheshire, N.W England
Posts: 6,803
Hi J1981
Could have been me writing that post! I can relate to how you feel perfectly.
I'm on day 9 now and this time it will be for good. Moderation has never worked for me, I've tried it so many times. I have now learnt it is all or nothing, so nothing it is.
You can do it.
Big hugs
Gxx
Could have been me writing that post! I can relate to how you feel perfectly.
I'm on day 9 now and this time it will be for good. Moderation has never worked for me, I've tried it so many times. I have now learnt it is all or nothing, so nothing it is.
You can do it.
Big hugs
Gxx
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