SheWanders

Professional drinking house guest just stopped by (in the middle of her work event) to drink a beer and smoke pot before heading back to work thing. Turned it down with 'no thanks, not partying anymore'. Got a 'really?!?!'. Then she proceeded to do her thing and didn't seem to care. Beyond simple!!!

Going to bed soon so I'll be unavailable when they get back.

Take away lesson: it's easy to say no and it will be even easier to tell people that you don't want alcohol in the house next time the situation arises.

Little victories.

(insert happy dance)

Deserto

Well done She! Love it!

blueshades

Way to go, SheWanders!

Anna

Yay, it's the little victories that count.

Pondlady

Don't you feel so proud of yourself?! Just think how she will feel tomorrow mornings vs. how YOU will feel

SheWanders

I was JUST thinking that :-)

Notmyrealname

It was good work to say no. But I would be wary of prideful comparisons to people who are not succeeding in their own battles with alcohol or drugs.

It was indeed not long ago that we wore those same shoes, and who knows what the future may bring?

snoopy87

That was a great decision. Keep the momentum.

SheWanders

Fair enough.

SeekSobriety

So glad you stood your ground! Congrats!
Do you mind if I may ask why she was drinking or smoking pot in your home? You stated she was a "house guest" Once I stopped drinking and using, I thankfully was able to tell others that I would appreciate if they did not drink or use around me. At least with pot and cigarettes. I would distance myself from that. Of course I do not know your home situation and perhaps you are in a shared house type of situation so it might be much harder for you to enforce a no drug zone in your home but it is worth looking into.

SheWanders

I thought about this quite a bit before they visited. It's my SIL and a coworker of her's that I had never met. Had it just been my SIL I would have said no booze in the house please(pot stopped being fun years ago and I don't have a problem saying no unless I'm drunk). The idea of involving someone that I never met was too much, I'll admit that. It would have been so awkward and pushed my anxiety to the point of making dash to the store. Being on day 2 (easy to say no for me) I knew that just letting them do their thing was the least anxiety producing situation for me. They are leaving this morning and they drank all the beer. I had planned to send any leftovers home with them.

Now, had this been day 4 or 5 (weak days) I would have been forced to handle it differently. Thankfully this isn't an issue very often at all. I don't go to bars and never had too many people over to drink. Like many of us I drank alone.

This brings me to something that kept me up a little last night. As I struggle to get sober I feel like I am looking around me and beginning to get worried about other peoples' drinking. I know I need to focus on myself and I would NEVER say anything to anyone about their drinking at this point. I was just wondering if this is common. There are many normal drinkers in my life and that's fine. It's the heavy drinkers that concern me. I knew that I had lots of drinking friends but now I wonder if they feel like me at times. I would hate that for them. NMRN got me to thinkng about that in particular. I think I assumed that I was the only one of my circle that let it get so bad. That woke up so anxious as to be crippled, not just with a simple hangover, which I was I assumed everyone else had. I should know by reading on here that a lot of people get to this point. I hate the thought that people close to me could feel that bad. It's hard to tell if they do. It was hard to tell that I did.

Sorry for the ramble. I hope that makes sense. It's early and I am using my phone so I can't read back through easily.

debsam

^^^^ This^^^^ - I can't even express to you just how much I relate to this....every word of it.

I will NEVER allow myself to feel like this again. And yes, like you, it pains me to think anyone else feels like this and suffers silently.

It's another reason as to why I will always have SR in my life to try and help in others and let them know they are no longer alone with this.

Good stuff SW