I'm not giving up yet

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08-07-2012, 12:35 PM

# 1 (permalink)

Fallow

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Join Date: Jul 2011

Location: Meditation

Posts: 1,300

I'm not giving up yet

Back on day 2 again and frustrated. Got wasted beyond belief blackout drunk last weekend. No, it was not fun. Going to meeting tonight and as much as I can till I reach solid ground. Tired of suicidal thoughts..
Looks like its gonna be sobriety or death but I'm not ready to choose death.

I gotta start hangin here more

08-07-2012, 12:52 PM

# 2 (permalink)

LoftyIdeals

SoberOutlook

Join Date: Mar 2011

Posts: 3,089

That's the choice I had to make at my bottom, too, Fallow. Glad to see you back here and trying again. You can do this!

08-07-2012, 12:55 PM

# 3 (permalink)

Weasel1966

A simple guy making his way

Join Date: Apr 2012

Location: Maine

Posts: 7,867

Fallow. Glad your hear. Stay close to us.

Ken

08-07-2012, 01:05 PM

# 4 (permalink)

Anna

Administrator

Join Date: Aug 2003

Location: Dancing in the Light

Posts: 61,467

Yes, do come here and read and be inspired.

I'm glad you're here.

08-07-2012, 01:24 PM

# 5 (permalink)

Fallow

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Join Date: Jul 2011

Location: Meditation

Posts: 1,300

Thanks Lofty.

I really enjoyed your 1 year story. Very inspirational. I needed that today.

08-07-2012, 01:29 PM

# 6 (permalink)

2granddaughters

Member

Join Date: Dec 2011

Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get

Posts: 4,768

Fallow, the meetings were/are my salvation.

All the best to you.

Bob R

08-07-2012, 02:37 PM

# 7 (permalink)

hypochondriac

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Join Date: Oct 2011

Location: UK

Posts: 5,678

Glad you're still here Fallow xxx

08-07-2012, 02:46 PM

# 8 (permalink)

Dee74

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Join Date: Apr 2007

Location: Australia

Posts: 211,366

Glad to see you back Fallow

08-07-2012, 02:58 PM

# 9 (permalink)

sissy07

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Join Date: Aug 2011

Location: Austin, Texas

Posts: 1,387

Welcome back Fallow!

08-07-2012, 07:27 PM

# 10 (permalink)

Fallow

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Join Date: Jul 2011

Location: Meditation

Posts: 1,300

Went to meeting as planned and enjoyed it. Talking about a design for living tonight. Obviously that's why I was there I have no design for living. Amazing I've gotten this far or a flat out miracle. I didn't come this far to give up and give in to my demons. But as always my resolve is super high right now...I need to find a way to keep it here.

08-07-2012, 07:49 PM

# 11 (permalink)

2granddaughters

Member

Join Date: Dec 2011

Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get

Posts: 4,768

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fallow

Get a home group... get a sponsor and work the Steps.

Everything will fall into place. Have faith and follow the oldtimers.

All the best.

Bob R

08-07-2012, 08:10 PM

# 12 (permalink)

sugarbear1

~sb

Join Date: Jul 2011

Location: MD

Posts: 15,960

Find a sponsor and work those steps! A new solution awaits!!!

Hugs & love,

08-07-2012, 08:31 PM

# 13 (permalink)

NoFireWater

Awaiting Email Confirmation

Join Date: Jul 2011

Location: New England

Posts: 604

Fallow, I remember your posts from my first (short lived) time here a year ago. Now we're both back ready to try again. Wishing you best of luck at keeping the good intentions a reality!

08-07-2012, 09:13 PM

# 14 (permalink)

IndaMiricale

Powerless over Alcohol

Join Date: May 2011

Location: Trudging the Road to Happy Destiny!

Posts: 4,018

Great advice , stick around tight , you can stay be free.

08-08-2012, 05:39 AM

# 15 (permalink)

Fallow

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Join Date: Jul 2011

Location: Meditation

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Woke up irritable day 3. Same ol merry go round.

08-08-2012, 07:26 AM

# 16 (permalink)

Jeni26

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Join Date: Mar 2012

Location: South East England

Posts: 8,008

Day 3 is hard, remember it gets so much better. Make this your last day 3 ever xx

08-08-2012, 07:33 AM

# 17 (permalink)

NoFireWater

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Join Date: Jul 2011

Location: New England

Posts: 604

Day 3 is the worst! I remember how crappy I felt. It gets better!

08-08-2012, 07:37 AM

# 18 (permalink)

Live2Run25

Run to live... live to run

Join Date: Jun 2012

Location: Western Maryland

Posts: 1,091

Glad you are back!

08-08-2012, 06:42 PM

# 19 (permalink)

Fallow

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Join Date: Jul 2011

Location: Meditation

Posts: 1,300

Gotta say it's been a wild ride today! Went from irritable, to uncomfortable, to angry, to super busy at work, to happy, To having cravings. Just ate dinner and in bed now.

I can already see it will be a fight with the AV. But I'm not drinking even if my @ss falls off.

I'm finished.

Couldn't get to a meeting today cause I had my daughter but tomorrow will be there for sure.