Please, please help.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Pittsburgh,Pa
Posts: 6
Please, please help.
So, I have totally reverted to being a mind numbing drunk and I hate myself for this. I had tried so hard and it didn't work. I need help, your support and encouragement, please. I'm heartbroken and so angry with myself. I owe it to myself and family to quit. I don't wan to live like this. Alcohol has consumed me so thoroughly that I feel sucked into a black hole...
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: wales, uk
Posts: 43
Oh Kit Kat, I wish I could help, but im clueless myself! However, i know there are li
oads of people on here just ready to support you, dont be afraid
. You will get through this with all the suggestions and support. I feel helpless right now, but there is also, a place inside me ful of hope we will get through it I am no expert here but I can lend an ear hugs and support your way xx
oads of people on here just ready to support you, dont be afraid
. You will get through this with all the suggestions and support. I feel helpless right now, but there is also, a place inside me ful of hope we will get through it I am no expert here but I can lend an ear hugs and support your way xx
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: South East England
Posts: 8,009
KitKat, you are not alone. There are people all over the world who are listening to you right now.
We understand. We have all felt like you do. I hated myself, I felt hopeless and out of control.
There is hope. Me and many many others are turning our lives around. It really is possible.
Are you drinking now?
Xxxxxxx
We understand. We have all felt like you do. I hated myself, I felt hopeless and out of control.
There is hope. Me and many many others are turning our lives around. It really is possible.
Are you drinking now?
Xxxxxxx
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,439
What kind of support do you have Kit Kat?
Have you tried face to face support like seeing your Dr, or AA or an alternative like SMART, or counselling...or other recovery programmes like Rational Recovery?
Sometimes it takes asking for help in order to get better - noone does this alone
D
Have you tried face to face support like seeing your Dr, or AA or an alternative like SMART, or counselling...or other recovery programmes like Rational Recovery?
Sometimes it takes asking for help in order to get better - noone does this alone
D
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Cleveland, OH
Posts: 1,191
Kit kat, like you, booze had me consumed over 4 years ago. I finally asked for help and have been sober and happy ever since. I sought medical attention first, which you should consider when detoxing. I then joined AA. There, I not only learned how to not drink. I learned how to live a happy, sober and free life. As mentioned above, we can't do it alone. Maybe consider looking for AA meetings near you. Just google search.good luck!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Pittsburgh,Pa
Posts: 6
No, i am currently sober. I ran out of booze early last night so didn't get as inebriated as I normally would.
I have no outside support aside from this website. I have hidden my drinking so well from family, friends and my spouse. I can't turn to them , at least not now. I would love to go to AA meetings but can't figure out how without my husband finding out. I know I should tell him but it's not that easy. Not just because of shame but he would not understand and aside from my own personal problems, him knowing would start a whole other set of issues.
I have found some of the most wonderful, caring and compassionate people on here. It's sad I can turn to all of you before people I've known forever. I thank you so sincerely for all of you supprt...
I have no outside support aside from this website. I have hidden my drinking so well from family, friends and my spouse. I can't turn to them , at least not now. I would love to go to AA meetings but can't figure out how without my husband finding out. I know I should tell him but it's not that easy. Not just because of shame but he would not understand and aside from my own personal problems, him knowing would start a whole other set of issues.
I have found some of the most wonderful, caring and compassionate people on here. It's sad I can turn to all of you before people I've known forever. I thank you so sincerely for all of you supprt...
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get
Posts: 4,768
Originally Posted by KitKat0398 
I have found some of the most wonderful, caring and compassionate people on here. It's sad I can turn to all of you before people I've known forever. I thank you so sincerely for all of you supprt...
Call the local AA number in your telephone book and talk to them... you'll see.
All the best.
Bob R
Spiritual Learner
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Chicago, Illinois
Posts: 165
KitKat I pray you find your way. Definetly keep posting here and look for methods that will help you, like Dee said. I went to AA and found my life through others helping and sharing their experience, strength, and hope.
We are sick as our secrets are, yeah they might bring up issues but in the long run it will free you from your secret. You can go to AA first without telling him right away and then break it too him (it is possible people around you have more of the idea than you, but maybe not) (I thught the same way until I sobered up and then people around me told me they knew I had a problem but didn't know how to approach me about it). If you keep drinking that black hole will just keep growing and then it will start pushing your family away even futher (physically).
Be good to yourself look everybody had to start somewhere, we all had to have a bottom in order to do something about our drinking, use this and go to AA, addiction counseling, (don't listen to those voices in your head), AVRT, Smart, R.R., just keep making strides.
I wish you the best and the strength to do what is hard and the compassion to be gentle to yourself. God Bless you on your journey!
We are sick as our secrets are, yeah they might bring up issues but in the long run it will free you from your secret. You can go to AA first without telling him right away and then break it too him (it is possible people around you have more of the idea than you, but maybe not) (I thught the same way until I sobered up and then people around me told me they knew I had a problem but didn't know how to approach me about it). If you keep drinking that black hole will just keep growing and then it will start pushing your family away even futher (physically).
Be good to yourself look everybody had to start somewhere, we all had to have a bottom in order to do something about our drinking, use this and go to AA, addiction counseling, (don't listen to those voices in your head), AVRT, Smart, R.R., just keep making strides.
I wish you the best and the strength to do what is hard and the compassion to be gentle to yourself. God Bless you on your journey!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Cleveland, OH
Posts: 1,191
I hid my dinking from my spouse and famijly for a long time as well, kitkat. I can tell you that it was a million times easier to get better once my loved ones knew what was going on. We spend a lot of energy on hiding our addiction. If we continue to use all that energy in hiding our recovery, we will run ourselves into the ground and drink again. Early on I needed people to be accountable to. For me, an online community may have helped, but it would have been too easy to go back out knowing that nobody really knew me and what I was trying to do. Having my loved ones and fellow AAs keepin me in check was essential for me. I don't have a good history of holding myself accountable. I tend to always sell myself short.
The truth will set you free. It really will. Wishing you the best.
The truth will set you free. It really will. Wishing you the best.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Keep Trying
Posts: 370
Getting time sober under my belt has helped me with clarity. Next, I plan on being serious about attending aa. I hope you can find the strength to stay sober, it is hard but only good will come out of it. I'm sorry for your pain. It is so hard to deal with this stuff alone and keep it a secret.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: San Diego
Posts: 4,451
Hi, Kit.
I remember exactly what that black hole feels like—so cold, dark, and lonely. You will be amazed how soon the light and warmth will return. The desire to drink is very strong at first, but it can't hurt you, doesn't actually cause any pain. Keep that in mind when you feel the cravings come. You do not have to drink; the desire comes from your addiction—it wants you to drink, but it cannot make you do it, all it can do is try and trick you into thinking you need or want a drink.
There are a lot of ways to quit. Obviously Bob is all about AA; many of us have found other paths out of the hole. You can do it, too. And you will be so grateful you did!
I remember exactly what that black hole feels like—so cold, dark, and lonely. You will be amazed how soon the light and warmth will return. The desire to drink is very strong at first, but it can't hurt you, doesn't actually cause any pain. Keep that in mind when you feel the cravings come. You do not have to drink; the desire comes from your addiction—it wants you to drink, but it cannot make you do it, all it can do is try and trick you into thinking you need or want a drink.
There are a lot of ways to quit. Obviously Bob is all about AA; many of us have found other paths out of the hole. You can do it, too. And you will be so grateful you did!
Member of SMART Recovery
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 1,722
KitKat:
What you've run across here is a real gem of a recovery support site, because what is offered here is a sampling of all different types of folks who have quit their addictions in all sorts of different ways or who are in the process of finding their way. In my own case my background includes both AA and SMART Recovery. SMART has turned out to be more to my taste, but the point for you is to determine what suits YOU.
One thing you may like about SMART is that the online experience over there is quite good--at least two online meetings every day.
What you've run across here is a real gem of a recovery support site, because what is offered here is a sampling of all different types of folks who have quit their addictions in all sorts of different ways or who are in the process of finding their way. In my own case my background includes both AA and SMART Recovery. SMART has turned out to be more to my taste, but the point for you is to determine what suits YOU.
One thing you may like about SMART is that the online experience over there is quite good--at least two online meetings every day.
Powerless over Alcohol
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Trudging the Road to Happy Destiny!
Posts: 4,018
Originally Posted by 2granddaughters
You will find us at the AA tables as well.
Call the local AA number in your telephone book and talk to them... you'll see.
All the best.
Bob R
Call the local AA number in your telephone book and talk to them... you'll see.
All the best.
Bob R
Good love, Inda
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 8,326
KitKat,
rational recovery really helped me. There's a technique called AVRT. You might read through this link and find it helpful
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...iscussion.html
Love from Lenina
rational recovery really helped me. There's a technique called AVRT. You might read through this link and find it helpful
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...iscussion.html
Love from Lenina
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Welcome KitKat -
I found hope here when I felt hopeless and it was enough to make me want to turn things around for myself. At first, it was all I could do to stay sober for another hour or another minute, so be patient with yourself - it really will get better.
It might help to read about withdrawals if you've been drinking on a daily basis. Seeing a doctor can help you get through the first couple days. Just know that, no matter what your husband says or does, you deserve to be healthy and happy!
I found hope here when I felt hopeless and it was enough to make me want to turn things around for myself. At first, it was all I could do to stay sober for another hour or another minute, so be patient with yourself - it really will get better.
It might help to read about withdrawals if you've been drinking on a daily basis. Seeing a doctor can help you get through the first couple days. Just know that, no matter what your husband says or does, you deserve to be healthy and happy!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,439
Like you've seen KitKat, there's many different approaches and methods of recovery around - here's some links to some of the main players:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html
Like OTT said many of these (AA as well as non 12 step programmes) now offer online meetings.
Some, like the Rational Recovery approach Lenina mentioned, have no meetings at all but rely on books.
I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach.
There's a lot of ways to move forward, regardless of individual obstacles
D
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...formation.html
Like OTT said many of these (AA as well as non 12 step programmes) now offer online meetings.
Some, like the Rational Recovery approach Lenina mentioned, have no meetings at all but rely on books.
I recommend you visit the Secular Connections forum if you think you may benefit from a non 12 step approach.
There's a lot of ways to move forward, regardless of individual obstacles
D
Member
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Irish
Posts: 552
Stick with the winners here....we have used Many Different Methods....Personally I use AA....Im now Attending ACA as well....Drink plenty of Liquids...Minerals , Tea,Water,Fluse out the Booze....Flush out the Guilt.I think you should tell your Husband...your getting help...He has to understand...hes your Husband.Keep the Chin up...Take care KitKat
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