WhiskeyBent

Hi All. I stumbled onto this site a couple days ago. Two days ago I figured i better slow down on my drinking. So I stopped. Its been hard. I have never made it a week without a drink (or ten). My thinking is why not give this forum a try. It seems like a good place to try a lick this. Im not the AA type. And man did i crave a drink today.

Im not really sure where to type next. Or what to even tell. I think ill keep reading other peoples stories. They are helpful.

Dee74

Welcome aboard WhiskeyBent

D

Stevie1

Welcome! Congrats on two days!

Besides this forum do you have a plan or any tools to stay sober?

Anna

Welcome!

I'm glad you made the decision to stop drinking. You'll find lots of support here.

MastiffGuy

Whiskeybent - Welcome to SR! I am not the AA type either, this forum has been a very effective crutch for me. Good luck and congrats on your first couple days of sobriety.

WhiskeyBent

First thanks for the welcomes. What a great community.


No.

And im a bit worried about that. Its my wife s birthday in a couple of days, and im not sure how to pull off an alcohol free evening.

Stevie1

Keep reading and learning! There isn't a concern or issue that hasn't been covered here. Including alcohol-related occasions in early sobriety; quite common.

Reason I said that is that while some people manage to stay sober without support, most people (myself included) eventually need help to stay sober. Whether it's AA or another group program, counseling, a solid spiritual foundation, obsessively checking in on this site.... But something.

WhiskeyBent

I like the idea of Urge Surfing. (i think it is called that?) I cant find the thread at the moment, but i tried it for the first time today.

Stevie1

Urge Surfing is one of my primary tools.

Mindfulness

WhiskeyBent

Just some other random thoughts. Maybe others have thoughts about it.

My body feels terrible. Im not sure what it is called, but it is physical.

And im eating like a pig. Cant get enough. Cant be good. Some say they lose weight, i might gain 15 pounds just getting through this.

Stevie1

For many people, drinking was a main source of calories and also sugar. Eating like a pig after quitting alcohol is totally normal. I am still doing this.

Be aware of detox symptoms and know tht detox can be lethal. Seriously. Good friend of mine almost died last April from this.
Alcohol Detox - Withdrawal Symptoms and Treatment Program Options

WhiskeyBent

Thanks for the link. I definitely have some of those symptoms. Depression, Anxiety, Strong Alcoholic cravings, sweats, and headaches.

I just thought it was something that happened. I didn't realize that is a clinical term, or there was some science behind it.

Yikes.

WhiskeyBent

Is there some forum links about how to go out in a social situation while trying to stay sober?

Stevie1

You might try searching terms, like party or social drinking...or just browse. Someone brings this up daily, almost. Or start a new thread asking about it.

Most people will advise you to protect your sobriety and avoid all "trigger" situations early on. For the birthday situation, I'd maybe make it a big known deal that you won't be drinking that night. That way your wife and everyone there will hold you accountable, assuming they are supportive,

WhiskeyBent

I think my friends and family will be supportive if i tell them. And i will tell them. Only one problem, they are all heavy drinkers. The booze is built right into the planed activities. After 20 plus years of drinking, its hard to walk into the party and say, im out. Im feeling some anxiety about it, and can see myself caving.

Im reading how people liked urge surfing and were going to add it to their tool box. I wish i had a tool box. What is inside? What else works?

soberbrooke

I have only gone to social situations 3 times in the past 7 months. I really want this sobriety this time around. I had to change people, places and things. It is the only thing that worked for me this time.
If you are detoxing then tell your doc., I didn't detox as bad as others, but I did crave food, candy and sugar especially. I gained 15 lbs, but since then I have lost those extra 15, and leveled off. I still have some to go, but I am not putting that first in my life at this time.
Sobriety is first in my life this time, that is what I needed and wanted.

IndaMiricale

I dont know what the AA "type" is other than someone that wants to quit drinking but that is my social world.

DisplacedGRITS

one thing i've found in my recovery is the less big of a deal i make about my teetotaling, the less big a deal others make about it. if someone is insistent on you drinking, there's something up with them, not you. if someone inquires about why you aren't drinking it's none of their business but they may honestly be curious. a simple "i just don't feel like it" should suffice. if it doesn't, that says something about that person, not you. stick to your guns. even a solid "i'm making some healthier life choices in general" should dissuade the more persistent people. beyond that, that person may have their own issues to deal with.

Missy7

WB--a couple of things. I've asked the questions on here about what others will say when I don't drink. The response that meant the most to me is that nobody else cares or notices whether you are drinking. It's only us alkies counting glasses.

And as for AA...I am not pushing AA (I am also not the AA type) but I have really appreciated the meetings a couple of times. If you go to a decent sized meeting you can beg off talking and no one will care....You will learn so much.

Hang in there and welcome to SR.

Retread59

Yes, I think you will find that no one much cares whether you drink or not except for you and perhaps the other alcoholics in your life. Hopefully you are not surrounded by them but, if you are, you may have to remind yourself that you are making the changes that they are not yet ready to make.

There are lots of tools that can help. I also use AA and never thought in a million years that I was an AA type, but it turns out that I didn't really know myself or AA very well. Others find various other programs or approaches to be helpful. So take a look around, see if you can find something that you think will work for you, and give it a shot. If it doesn't seem to be helping you settle down, you can always move on to something else.