HappyAccidents

Hello everyone. After completing my three months alcohol abstinence in late March I have been partying & drinking for the past (almost) four months. Not constantly though, I've had weeks off at least 3 times during that time. Naturally i thought i could moderate, but surely enough that didn't happen.
Anyway I have planned to quit again for good.

I'm turning 30 in about three weeks and I'd really like my next decade to be one without substance abuse. My 20's were about excess for some reason so i better change that.

I planned my 30th at a pub a few months ago, so I'm not sure whether to cancel it or just be strong and not drink. I'll let my guests know prior to the day as well. I've done it before (not drink) so I'll do it again.

I know there's never a convenient time to quit so I might as well have my 30th there and just behave. I was planning to 'throw in the towel' the minute i turned 30 anyway, so a few weeks before might be the best bet.

Thanks for listening & any additional advice is greatly appreciated.

TorontoGuy28

Yes, cancel your party at a pub. That's my advice.

Being a "paused" alcoholic at a party with booze and people I drank with, - 99.99% of the time resulted in me being smashed...

Get real and honest with yourself., that is what has worked for me...

Anna

Yeah, I agree.

Cancel the party at the pub and do something different and healthy to celebrate your 30th birthday.

Live2Run25

I complete agree with the others. You NEED to have your party somewhere other than a bar. That's just asking for trouble

2granddaughters

Alcoholics Anonymous got and has kept me sober for quite a while now.

When you are ready to quit I'm sure it will do the same for you as well.

All the best.

Bob R

navy0923

Have to agree, cancel.

auden67

I cancelled a BBQ I planned for my birthday this year. I went to dinner with my BF and ordered a delicious tonic and blackberry juice. It was a lovely day, and I sailed past Day 8 with little problems. I would skip the pub and do something different and wonderful for yourself!

DisplacedGRITS

i would find it hard to be at a party at a pub so early in recovery, especially if that party was mine. maybe you could move the party to your place or a location that's not so alcohol oriented? either way, welcome to SR!

IndaMiricale

Well I think cancel wins this vote

Welcome aboard.

gaffo

The bars here are gross and/or boring when I'm sober. I don't know what I'll do when my (first sober) birthday rolls around but it won't be going to a bar!

HappyAccidents

Thanks

I should have been a little more specific -- It's at a restaurant / bar / live music venue.
Wherever I have it, it'll be at a licensed venue, and even if i didn't, people would bring alcohol for themselves anyway, which would be accessible to me.

I have had no problems being in these environments when i abstained for months at a time.

Anyway, whatever happens come Aug 12 it's over.

Just being honest.

instant

How about an early morning breakfast, or a picnic in a park? paintball?

SeekSobriety

It took me writing a letter to myself about why I wanted and needed to give up drinking. When times were good and people invited me out to "hang out" at a pub or "grab drinks" I read my letter and reminded myself why I gave up drinking.

I do not put myself in compromising situations such as pubs or clubs if I can help it. If my friends want to hang out, I suggest we go to the beach, a museum, a diner/cafe a amusement park, etc. There is plenty of fun to have in life without drinking. Plus I don't wake up trying to piece together what happened the night before while nursing a hangover and regretting saying something stupid or doing something stupider

All in all life is much more manageable while sober. Sure some days are hard but not nearly as hard as it took to live a double life as a alcoholic or addict. It's alot of work to try and maintain a normal life while boozing at nights and weekends.

Happy birthday to you! How exciting to start the new chapter of life without needing to fill each day or weekends with drugs and alchohol.

I will say that I did learn who my true friends were once I gave up using. Freindships can be like Facebook, sometimes we think we have lots of "friends" but in reality we many only have a couple "true" friends. But I will take a few "real" friends over hundreds of "friends" by name only. Actions speak louder then words.

Thanks for letting me share,
Happy birthday!