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Am I an alcoholic?

Old 07-18-2012, 08:32 AM
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Am I an alcoholic?

Hi, my name is Jessica and I am 25. I went to my first AA meeting last night and it was an eye opener. I met a lot of great people and exchanged numbers. I have pretty bad anxiety which is why I was drinking so much. I wonder if getting in control of my anxiety would help me stop drinking or if I truly do have a problem. I have to admit I did crave alcohol last night after the meeting but stuck it out. Is it ever possible to just be a social drinker?
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Old 07-18-2012, 08:37 AM
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Not sure, I'd drink anything with anyone, anytime, anywhere. That's a social drinker right?

All kidding aside, I think that everyone has their reasons for drinking. For me it was chronic shyness. When sober I couldn't hold a conversation in real time with anyone, especially those of the female persuasion, but after a few drinks, I was Fred Astaire, Don Juan and a few other's all rolled up into one extremely handsome (in my opinion) dude, that anyone in their right mind would be stupid to ignore.

Don't know if you're an alcoholic. Only you can answer that, but if drinking causes problems or problems cause drinking then you need to end the cycle.
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Old 07-18-2012, 08:38 AM
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Yes, you are an alcoholic.
No, you can never be a social drinker again.
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Old 07-18-2012, 08:44 AM
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Originally Posted by DAB View Post
Yes, you are an alcoholic.
No, you can never be a social drinker again.
Interesting - How do you know this DAB?
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Old 07-18-2012, 08:44 AM
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well- what brought you to making the decision to go to an AA meeting?

Have you ever spoke to a Dr. about your anxiety? Drinking can cause more anxiety and it becomes a never ending cycle- until you end it.

This site is a great place for advice, support, and friendship. I myself am iin AA and it's been a lifesaver for me.

As for ever being a social drinker? IMO if you are an alcoholic the answer would be no. If you are not an alcoholic then who knows.

Welcome--
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Old 07-18-2012, 08:45 AM
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Welcome to SR Jessica :ghug3
That's not a question I can answer. It's one only you can answer.
I'll ask one question in return. When you start drinking, do you ever drink more than you mean to?
You say it was an eye opener? I'm guessing that you related to a lot of what people said. If you are an alcoholic, then no. No, you can't go back to being a 'social drinker'.
Sorry if that's a little blunt, but it's there.
You must have had worries about your drinking, and 'social drinkers' don't. If you're drinking is making you unhappy, if it's making you upset and anxious, and if you're going to AA or posting here, it sounds like it is.
There are two suggestions that you've probably heard. Try and quit for 90 days. If you can do that, and it's easy, then that's great, and you aren't an alcoholic.
The other one is to try some controlled drinking - start drinking and try and stop abruptly.

But labels aren't important. What matters is this. Do you want to be sober? And are you prepared to go to any lengths to achieve this?
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Old 07-18-2012, 08:46 AM
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Originally Posted by DAB View Post
Yes, you are an alcoholic.
No, you can never be a social drinker again.
What are you basing this fact on?
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Old 07-18-2012, 08:51 AM
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In the Big Book of AA it suggests this:


If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking, you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic.

Choice and control. According to the Big Book, If Ive lost those Im probably an alcoholic.
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Old 07-18-2012, 08:57 AM
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Welcome JMariano825,

Try to be kind to yourself and not "label" yourself just yet. Keep attending meetings, posting here and educating yourself, all while remaining sober. In time, the answer will become clear to you.
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Old 07-18-2012, 08:58 AM
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I am a safety guy. I would rather be wrong and not have her drink again, than be wrong or indecisive and have her drink until she dies or ruins her life.
If someone calls and says They think They smell gas in their house, should I evacuate?
You don't tell them, I'm not there, you have to decide how strong the smell is.
You tell them yes! Get out of that house and call 911.
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Old 07-18-2012, 09:12 AM
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Ill take Alcoholic for 200 Alex....... If I didnt have a drinking problem there are plenty of places I would rather be than AA meeting. Just sayin...
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Old 07-18-2012, 09:12 AM
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No one can say what you can or can not do but what I DO know is this: I can't be a social drinker because by my nature I am not social when I drink! I suppose that I was at one time many years ago but drinking alone became the norm for me. No fun! Also if I can't get wasted what's the point of having 1 or 2? These two realizations really put it out there that I needed to give it up. Hasn't been easy but it's getting easier. Finding fun things to do w/o alcohol has become a passion since I quit and I've found many. Welcome to SR -- so glad that you're here!
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Old 07-18-2012, 09:14 AM
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Welcome to SR Jessica. Congratulations on getting through those cravings and well done for going to AA - that's something that most people find very hard to do, so that's excellent - you should be proud of yourself!

Only you know whether you are an alcoholic or not, but coming here and going to AA suggests that you know that you at least have an issue with alcohol and want to overcome it. I don't think it matters or not whether you are technically an alcoholic, the fact that you are working on sobriety is excellent and I applaud you.
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Old 07-18-2012, 09:18 AM
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most people who worry enough about their drinking to question it and go so far as to attend an AA meeting are probably an alcoholic. you want to quit but it's not just a matter of setting down the bottle. alcohol isn't just a drink, it's a drug. it's a coping skill. that is part of what makes and alcoholic and alcoholic. we don't drink for pleasure, we drink out of necessity. can you be a social drinker? well, if you say your drinking to relieve anxiety, probably not. alcohol isn't to be used like that. that is what leads to full blown, debilitating alcoholism. what i would look into is other ways to deal with your anxiety. meditation, therapy, read some self help books on the topic. alcohol is not a medication. you may go to a therapist who will refer you to a psych who will put you on medication and i will assure you that you will not be permitted to drink if you are on anti-anxiety meds. no drinks ever, social or alone. is it worth it? well, i'm on medications that don't permit me to drink and i love it. having my mental state restore to functioning is awesome. i miss the alcohol from time to time but my days get so filled with sober activities i don't have much time to think about missing booze. think about what brought you to AA and what brought you here. you are reaching out for something and i think you've found it.
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Old 07-18-2012, 09:25 AM
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If you have bad anxiety then going to a doctor and getting anti-depression pills will help with your anxiety. It's normal to crave alcohol after an AA meeting because they talking alcohol most of the time. It's possible to drink socially again but only if you can control the amount of drinks you have in a night. If you keep on getting drunk most of the time you have a drink then, you may not be able to drink again.
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Old 07-18-2012, 09:46 AM
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Hi and Welcome,

Don't bother too much about the label. The important thing is how you feel about your drinking. And, if you're an alcoholic (you need to decide that), you can't moderate your drinking. We are here to offer you support.
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Old 07-18-2012, 09:58 AM
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Originally Posted by JMariano825 View Post
Hi, my name is Jessica and I am 25. I went to my first AA meeting last night and it was an eye opener. I met a lot of great people and exchanged numbers. I have pretty bad anxiety which is why I was drinking so much. I wonder if getting in control of my anxiety would help me stop drinking or if I truly do have a problem. I have to admit I did crave alcohol last night after the meeting but stuck it out. Is it ever possible to just be a social drinker?
Do yourself a really big favor and keep attending AA meetings regularly. The answers to your questions will become undeniably apparent.

All the best.

Bob R
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Old 07-18-2012, 10:00 AM
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Welcome, and I love seeing you younger people coming into the rooms of AA so early. And know you can not have to go the long route of hell. Only you can make that decision if you are alcoholic.
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Old 07-18-2012, 10:01 AM
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Welcome! Just echoing most everyone else, labeling can be harsh and scary. I'm not ready to say I'm an alcoholic. But the truth is, drinking does nothing but bad things to me. Including giving me anxiety, and making my anxiety worse. So, I decided to give it up. Stick around, lots of support here!
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Old 07-18-2012, 10:11 AM
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I think there are warning signs that indicate you don't handle alcohol like a "normal" person would...drinking alone, hiding or lying about what you drink,driving while impaired,spending time with drinking friends and not having much time for non drinkers,outwardly denying you have a problem while you're convinced inside that you do,having a hard time setting limits on number of drinks you have,etc.

The fact that you went to an AA meeting indicates that you think that you are, and are ready to deal with it. I applaud you for this. I know I'm well on my way, if not already there, and have never attended a meeting. That takes courage!

I think it's possible for people to be social drinkers, it's just not possible for alcoholics to be social drinkers.
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