New here
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 16
New here
My head is kind of a mess right now but I wanted to post a little intro about myself – as another user suggested I do. I also don’t wanna be rude so I thought I’d share a little. My name is B (my handle "Snapper" is as in picture-taker, not like I snap at people – LOL, I just realized that is kind of a bitchy handle, a bitch, I am not.) I’m 29 - and a half 
and I live in Chicago. I’ve been drinking heavily since I turned 21, other than the 15 months I spent clean through AA when I was 22-23 years old, I’ve drank pretty much every day for nearly a decade. I’m not really new to addiction and recovery, just revisiting the recovery part.
A few very recent events have pointed me in the direction of cleaning up my ****; two weekends ago I was attending the wedding of 2 very close friends. And I got ****-wrecked. I fell down, it was bad. I was walking down the driveway to go sleep it off in the car when I fell & I really hurt myself. I knocked myself out, gave myself a black eye and possibly a broken nose (it makes weird crunching sounds when I press on the side I fell on), I also slid across pavement so my strapless dress came down and I tore up my chest with bad road rash. I also tore off all the skin on the outside of my right leg. Only one person actually saw me fall and he said I “bounced off the pavement like a super-ball.” People joked about it but underneath the laughs I was mortified.
Fast forward a couple of weeks to this past weekend. On Saturday, I drank an entire bottle of high end vodka and I didn’t get drunk. I was like What. The. ****?! I knew it had to stop.
throughout all of this I've been gaining weight and I'm fairly sure I have sleep apnia, I've been told by my doctor that drinking and smoking is really bad for people who have this. I've woken up choking and completely unable to breath a few times recently, and these instances are becoming more frequent, and it's really scary.
I drank a couple of bottles of wine yesterday knowing that it was the last time. I went to bed wishing I was more drunk because I knew I wasn’t going to drink today.
So now all I can think about is not drinking. I have a very black-and-white personality and I know that moderation just isn’t something I can do. I either need to be not drinking or – well, how I have been for the past 6 or so years.
I haven’t told anyone of my plan to kick the habit, but I’ve been alluding to slowing down for a while. I came here for two reasons, I’m looking for something that’s not 12 step based & looking for support. *shrug* so that’s it. I don’t know how much more I’ll be able to be on here tonight, but I’ll come back tomorrow (hopefully not hungover) and see what’s cookin’
Thanks for e-listening.
and I live in Chicago. I’ve been drinking heavily since I turned 21, other than the 15 months I spent clean through AA when I was 22-23 years old, I’ve drank pretty much every day for nearly a decade. I’m not really new to addiction and recovery, just revisiting the recovery part. A few very recent events have pointed me in the direction of cleaning up my ****; two weekends ago I was attending the wedding of 2 very close friends. And I got ****-wrecked. I fell down, it was bad. I was walking down the driveway to go sleep it off in the car when I fell & I really hurt myself. I knocked myself out, gave myself a black eye and possibly a broken nose (it makes weird crunching sounds when I press on the side I fell on), I also slid across pavement so my strapless dress came down and I tore up my chest with bad road rash. I also tore off all the skin on the outside of my right leg. Only one person actually saw me fall and he said I “bounced off the pavement like a super-ball.” People joked about it but underneath the laughs I was mortified.
Fast forward a couple of weeks to this past weekend. On Saturday, I drank an entire bottle of high end vodka and I didn’t get drunk. I was like What. The. ****?! I knew it had to stop.
throughout all of this I've been gaining weight and I'm fairly sure I have sleep apnia, I've been told by my doctor that drinking and smoking is really bad for people who have this. I've woken up choking and completely unable to breath a few times recently, and these instances are becoming more frequent, and it's really scary.
I drank a couple of bottles of wine yesterday knowing that it was the last time. I went to bed wishing I was more drunk because I knew I wasn’t going to drink today.
So now all I can think about is not drinking. I have a very black-and-white personality and I know that moderation just isn’t something I can do. I either need to be not drinking or – well, how I have been for the past 6 or so years.
I haven’t told anyone of my plan to kick the habit, but I’ve been alluding to slowing down for a while. I came here for two reasons, I’m looking for something that’s not 12 step based & looking for support. *shrug* so that’s it. I don’t know how much more I’ll be able to be on here tonight, but I’ll come back tomorrow (hopefully not hungover) and see what’s cookin’
Thanks for e-listening.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
((Snapper)) Welcome to SR!! Just as a caution, please do seek medical care if stopping the alcohol causes problems...it can be serious, even fatal.
As far as recovery, I did go to 12-step meetings, still use what I learned there. However, I've got over 5 years in recovery thanks to SR, the people here, and wanting to recover more than anything else. There are different ways to recovery, I think the most important part is how bad we want it.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
As far as recovery, I did go to 12-step meetings, still use what I learned there. However, I've got over 5 years in recovery thanks to SR, the people here, and wanting to recover more than anything else. There are different ways to recovery, I think the most important part is how bad we want it.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 16
Originally Posted by Dinah 
Welcome Snapper!! I have been right where you are. I am new too and this seems like a soft place to land during hard times. Hang in there girl, we're all rooting for ya!!
you hang in there too!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: San Diego
Posts: 522
Welcome Snapper.
I think it's great you are recognizing the progression of alcoholism at a young age. I'm 45 and believe me, I wish could have had the insight you have at 29.
I remember when I couldn't get drunk off beer anymore. So I switched to liquor.
I also remember when I couldn't get drunk off a fifth anymore.
So I started buying handles (1.75 L).
Use any program that works for you, because it only gets worse.
All the best,
SD
I think it's great you are recognizing the progression of alcoholism at a young age. I'm 45 and believe me, I wish could have had the insight you have at 29.
I remember when I couldn't get drunk off beer anymore. So I switched to liquor.
I also remember when I couldn't get drunk off a fifth anymore.
So I started buying handles (1.75 L).
Use any program that works for you, because it only gets worse.
All the best,
SD
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Chicago, IL
Posts: 16
Originally Posted by SDSurfn
Welcome Snapper.
I think it's great you are recognizing the progression of alcoholism at a young age. I'm 45 and believe me, I wish could have had the insight you have at 29.
I remember when I couldn't get drunk off beer anymore. So I switched to liquor.
I also remember when I couldn't get drunk off a fifth anymore.
So I started buying handles (1.75 L).
Use any program that works for you, because it only gets worse.
All the best,
SD
I think it's great you are recognizing the progression of alcoholism at a young age. I'm 45 and believe me, I wish could have had the insight you have at 29.
I remember when I couldn't get drunk off beer anymore. So I switched to liquor.
I also remember when I couldn't get drunk off a fifth anymore.
So I started buying handles (1.75 L).
Use any program that works for you, because it only gets worse.
All the best,
SD
I dont know what other programs there are other than AA. any ideas?
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,960
(my computer is acting up, so I can't edit my post)
Search out:
Rational Recovery
AVRT
SMART
Women for Sobriety
Life Ring (I think you create your own program)
There may be others, I can't think of them off hand.
Best wishes on your recovery journey!
Search out:
Rational Recovery
AVRT
SMART
Women for Sobriety
Life Ring (I think you create your own program)
There may be others, I can't think of them off hand.
Best wishes on your recovery journey!
Grateful AA member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: In the middle of the woods, NJ
Posts: 567
Welcome Snapper my first thought was the fish not someone that "snaps" at everyone :rotfxko Welcome to SR. I am 32 and drank for a decade too not heavily at first but the progressed really kicked my ass. Its good to seek help now and glad to meet you. Keep on posting.
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
Originally Posted by Snapper
I’m looking for something that’s not 12 step based & looking for support. *shrug* so that’s it.
Welcome, also.
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