Not doing well
Not doing well
Last night we went to my parent's house. I slept in my brother's room. Despite my mother's best efforts, it still smelled like him. I slept in the bed where he died. There were pictures of him everywhere, and I found an empty listerine bottle in his closet. My mother didn't know it had come to him drinking mouthwash.
It pretty much sucked.
So on the way back home, I ordered a glass of wine at dinner. My husband asked if it was a good idea, and the look I gave him didn't beg an answer. I drank three more when I got home.
I have some grieve issues to deal with. And obviously, my horrible attempts at dealing with it. The fact of the matter is, my twin died. We have the same disease, and he just assisted in making sure it ravaged his body very quickly. I have the power to stop it if I choose to.
I anticipate an awful day of anxiety and panic attacks when the pinot leaves my system tomorrow.
Oh wait, it is tomorrow. 1:08 eastern standard time.
Damnitall.
It pretty much sucked.
So on the way back home, I ordered a glass of wine at dinner. My husband asked if it was a good idea, and the look I gave him didn't beg an answer. I drank three more when I got home.
I have some grieve issues to deal with. And obviously, my horrible attempts at dealing with it. The fact of the matter is, my twin died. We have the same disease, and he just assisted in making sure it ravaged his body very quickly. I have the power to stop it if I choose to.
I anticipate an awful day of anxiety and panic attacks when the pinot leaves my system tomorrow.
Oh wait, it is tomorrow. 1:08 eastern standard time.
Damnitall.
I'm so sorry about the loss of your twin brother. Grief was and is a big trigger for me.
Your back here posting so that is a good sign. There are many people who care here on SR.
It has been a life line. Get some rest and take care of yourself. Its a new day when you wake up.
Lotsa love
K
Your back here posting so that is a good sign. There are many people who care here on SR.
It has been a life line. Get some rest and take care of yourself. Its a new day when you wake up.
Lotsa love
K
Losing a sibling especially a twin is hard - but you have a chance to go on and complete your journey, C4G.
If what you're doing so far hasn't been working, maybe it's time to add more stuff?
D
If what you're doing so far hasn't been working, maybe it's time to add more stuff?
D
And I also understand that I need to add more *stuff*.
Thanks everyone. I really feel so thankful for SR and all of you.
It is 8 am, and I have a heavy head and feel like death sucking on a lifesaver. I had another after I posted at 1 am. What the hell?
So, as I say to everyone else, I need to pick myself up, dust myself off, and start anew. I am shaky this morning. I don't normally get shaky, so this is not good. Not good at all.
I haven't had a chance to check in on others, but will do so after I take to little people to pirate parties today (birthday themed). I am sober but not comfortable. My husband it going to drive us. Hummilating when I can't do normal tasks with this anxiety.
It is 8 am, and I have a heavy head and feel like death sucking on a lifesaver. I had another after I posted at 1 am. What the hell?
So, as I say to everyone else, I need to pick myself up, dust myself off, and start anew. I am shaky this morning. I don't normally get shaky, so this is not good. Not good at all.
I haven't had a chance to check in on others, but will do so after I take to little people to pirate parties today (birthday themed). I am sober but not comfortable. My husband it going to drive us. Hummilating when I can't do normal tasks with this anxiety.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: London
Posts: 65
Anticipate a new day, a better day, and you will have a better day. You might have made a mistake but remember:
I am at the top because I know that success, a win, doesn't make me, and failure, a loss, doesn't break me - Zig Ziglar
Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
- Confucius
Rise again Change, higher than before!
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