Mattcake

Hi all,

I'm wondering if anybody does goal-setting in recovery.

Background:

My life has been a huge rambling, fumbling mess for quite a while now, I really need some clarity.

Problem is, I'm very indecisive. I'm not a fan of goals in general, they scare me.

Clearly, I need to change.

I've been thinking that maybe I could use some non-threatening and meaningful goals to organise myself:

Like:

Short term (3-6 months):
- Finish painting house
- Settle on free-lance job

Mid-term goals (1-3 years):
- Finish school

Long term (3+ years):
- Travel.

(Obviously the main goal is to remain sober and in recovery)

It all looks very nice on paper, but I'm so random and unfocused that

Does anybody have strategies to approach this situation? Comments?

Anyone want to share some goals?

:ghug3

Weasel1966

Hey mattcake,

The things you say in describing yourself are disparate to the things you describe in your potential goals.

Trying to gain clarity? About what specifically? Drinking? If so then are you studying AVRT? That's a great short term goal that can help with focus.

If you need clarity about what to accomplish in life... Well... Then what you have down looks pretty good.

Abstinence in general is something to accomplish with every appearance of your AV... Addictive voice.

Do i set goals? Sometimes. My drinking was so bad that setting meant nothing. I could never be sober and be able to plan anything.

Now I set small reachable things. Like planning a weekend trip. And actually going. I have had recently planned some and never got there. Cost a lot for hotels I did not stay in.

My point is... Well... Lol... To focus. Try Personal small goals. Keep them small in scale and achievability. That will help you feel like you are getting somewhere. And in fact you will be.

Study AVRT or any other way you choose to stay abstinent and keep posting.

I hope I did not miss the point of your post.

All the best to you!

Mattcake

Thanks Weasel, good advice... And yeah, I was wondering about goal-setting in general. Does anybody explicitly set goals for themselves? I'm not referring to making plans for the weekend, more like.. deciding on a direction and committing to it (it goes without saying that it would include sobriety).

Our (western) society is so goal-driven... it's all about achievers and overachievers. I used to be one of the latter until I couldn't take it any longer and collapsed.

But now I feel like I'm wandering around aimlessly. So is there a middle ground? Is goal-setting healthy? The cynic within me is sneering, lol. But my optimistic voice, if you will, says it's worth it.

Weasel1966

In that sense... I hardly care what other think of what I have or how much I accomplished. So I feel, in general, little need to " achieve" for the sake of achieving.

My goal setting is personal and more internal for me alone. Or for those close to me that I want to help.

Middle ground is relative to each of us. Middle for mr trump is not my middle.

Good luck in finding yours.

At the risk of further missing the point I will defer to those overachievers around here.