NYCDoglvr

The answer: when his lips are moving.

Since dishonesty is so closely tied to addiction, I thought you'd enjoy this article on the topic.

What's your experience in trying to decide what's true, what's false?

SuzyMarie

Good article, thanks for sharing.

boomerlady

Wow, thanks for the article. It's so spot on to the way my AH is and has been since I've known him. He exagerrates everything and he tells wonderful stories even if half of the story isn't true. He tells stories about our children, who are grown now, and I shake my head and wonder how half his story is not what I remember. He is constantly trying to impress others, either through stories or his actions. His stories and actions are often lies or half-truths at best, in order to fool others and improve upon his real image since he's an active alcoholic. I often wondered why he felt all this was necessary almost like the air he breathes. I think this is key too as to why others often love our alcoholics and have a more difficult time seeing through the b.s. Thanks so much for sharing this.

lillamy

I believed everything he said. I believed he was truthful all the mothereffing time. Because truth was so important to him. Because he would be mad at the kids if they did something wrong but a furious animal if they lied.

So I believed he always told the truth.

And he did. In his way. In his universe, what he said was not lies. In the fictive world he had created in his mind in order to survive what a wretched human being he had turned into, he wasn't lying. His entire life was a lie.

Florence

Hm. That's all about what the quote at the bottom of my posts is about. People are evil in small ways every day, and it's often to preserve some image of themselves as a good person to the detriment of everyone else.

One of my personal goals is to learn how to accept this and move along, instead of getting caught up in the drama of "you lied to me!!!!!11!!" Because a worm is a worm, and I'm tired of rolling around in the dirt.

I usually like The Fix (until they start treating addiction like it's glamorous and super-fun). I always forget it's there until someone links to it.