Disgusted with myself again
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Central New Jersey, USA
Posts: 1,345
Disgusted with myself again
So I get three, four, five recently even ten days with out a drink - then I down the whole big bottle of wine in one night. Did it again yesterday - felt like hell today. Just thinking out loud. Can't stand myself sometimes!
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 1,022
I think if you can avoid that first drink from that big ol' bottle of wine, you probably avoid taking all the other drinks in the bottle that would normally follow. When you feel like you have to take that first drink, you should talk to somebody instead. Come here to SR and post, or go in the chat room, or head off to a meeting, or find a distraction that doesn't involve drinking, or call someone to talk about it.
You are not alone. It's a lot easier to stay dry if you have support and can talk it out with somebody who understands where you are coming from.
Good luck!
You are not alone. It's a lot easier to stay dry if you have support and can talk it out with somebody who understands where you are coming from.
Good luck!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by Notmyrealname 
I think if you can avoid that first drink from that big ol' bottle of wine, you probably avoid taking all the other drinks in the bottle that would normally follow. When you feel like you have to take that first drink, you should talk to somebody instead. Come here to SR and post, or go in the chat room, or head off to a meeting, or find a distraction that doesn't involve drinking, or call someone to talk about it.
You are not alone. It's a lot easier to stay dry if you have support and can talk it out with somebody who understands where you are coming from.
Good luck!
You are not alone. It's a lot easier to stay dry if you have support and can talk it out with somebody who understands where you are coming from.
Good luck!
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Oregon
Posts: 328
H TT. Good on ya for starting this thread. The majority of folks that down a big bottle of wine don't have that same courage you do to lay their feelings out there. I'm guessing since you are posting you think there may be a problem with being able to take big breaks, then bust down the big bottle. This is may seem like a personal question, so I'm just gonna follow-up on something you ended with..."Can't stand myself sometimes." Me, too.
What can't you stand about yourself?
What can't you stand about yourself?
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,308
So how do you manage to stay sober, do you have a program or what not?
I needed to get a program and work really hard at the beginning to stay sober.
I agree with crewisms about being brave and fessing up. That is such an important thing in recovery to be open and honest, good for you.
Crewisms I love that little quote very Zen.
Love
caiHong
I needed to get a program and work really hard at the beginning to stay sober.
I agree with crewisms about being brave and fessing up. That is such an important thing in recovery to be open and honest, good for you.
Crewisms I love that little quote very Zen.
Love
caiHong
Crazy Cat Lady
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 2,661
What leads to you picking up the bottle. It sounds like you're stuck in a loop. Something needs to happen, something needs to change to break you through that loop you're in. It's up to you to make that radical change in your routine. For me it was going to meetings daily. Turning my upside down world rightside up. Don't keep walking the same path and falling down the same hole. You know it's there now. Figure out what you have to do to walk around it. Eventually you'll learn how to avoid the hole regularly and it will become second nature. Eventually, you'll even learn to take another path.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: London, England
Posts: 724
"Can't stand myself sometimes." Neither can I. Well, not when I'm sober. What I've realised I need to do is learn how to like myself without drinking.
And yes. It is that simple. Don't pick up that first drink. Not having any in the house helps too. And no, simple isn't the same as easy
I find posting on here, picking up the phone, and going to AA meetings help keep me sober. Calling on my higher power does too.
And yes. It is that simple. Don't pick up that first drink. Not having any in the house helps too. And no, simple isn't the same as easy
I find posting on here, picking up the phone, and going to AA meetings help keep me sober. Calling on my higher power does too.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Between Meetings
Posts: 8,997
Originally Posted by MalkavianEmily
"Can't stand myself sometimes." Neither can I. Well, not when I'm sober. What I've realised I need to do is learn how to like myself without drinking.
And yes. It is that simple. Don't pick up that first drink. Not having any in the house helps too. And no, simple isn't the same as easy
I find posting on here, picking up the phone, and going to AA meetings help keep me sober. Calling on my higher power does too.
And yes. It is that simple. Don't pick up that first drink. Not having any in the house helps too. And no, simple isn't the same as easy
I find posting on here, picking up the phone, and going to AA meetings help keep me sober. Calling on my higher power does too.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Toronto,Ontario
Posts: 1,027
I've lived in your shoes, hated myself for doing the exact same thing.
You need a tactical plan to stay sober. First 3 months are absolutely critical......
For me, it meant avoiding places/people/activities that had drinking - NOT easy, but that's what this alcoholic had to do... Meetings are also critical, to be around others like me...
It gets much easier and much better, but please start attending meetings !
You need a tactical plan to stay sober. First 3 months are absolutely critical......
For me, it meant avoiding places/people/activities that had drinking - NOT easy, but that's what this alcoholic had to do... Meetings are also critical, to be around others like me...
It gets much easier and much better, but please start attending meetings !
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Central New Jersey, USA
Posts: 1,345
Thanks to all of you for taking the time to reply.
Crewisms - there are so many things about myself that I do not like - I'm shy, a bit insecure, not ugly but not a beauty or even close, a bit awkward. So then I drink and I become a different person - first two drinks that gal is great thereafter I am a self-important plain ole idiot sometimes - then I really dislike myself (after the buzz wears off)
Displaced - Not sure what really leads to picking up the bottle - I did have a really stressful day so that was the excuse - but sometimes its just the opposite I think wow what a relaxing day - lets sit on the porch with a glass and enjoy - so go figure. I do get the message though - gotas keep it out of the house at least as a start.
Dee- Unfortunately I have added nothing yet. Haven't really mapped out the recovery plan yet - kinda still think I can wing it and do it on my own.
TorontoGuy - Don't know that I can muster your resolve!
Wish I could respond individually to all of you but I'm running really late for something now. Thanks again to all of you.
Crewisms - there are so many things about myself that I do not like - I'm shy, a bit insecure, not ugly but not a beauty or even close, a bit awkward. So then I drink and I become a different person - first two drinks that gal is great thereafter I am a self-important plain ole idiot sometimes - then I really dislike myself (after the buzz wears off)
Displaced - Not sure what really leads to picking up the bottle - I did have a really stressful day so that was the excuse - but sometimes its just the opposite I think wow what a relaxing day - lets sit on the porch with a glass and enjoy - so go figure. I do get the message though - gotas keep it out of the house at least as a start.
Dee- Unfortunately I have added nothing yet. Haven't really mapped out the recovery plan yet - kinda still think I can wing it and do it on my own.
TorontoGuy - Don't know that I can muster your resolve!
Wish I could respond individually to all of you but I'm running really late for something now. Thanks again to all of you.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Canada. About as far south as you can get
Posts: 4,768
Originally Posted by Dee74
I always advise people to think of what they can add to whatever they've been doing for their recovery TTBABP - so what can you add? 
D
D
A good AA sponsor would likely have some positive input into developing a recovery plan that produces the desired results.
All the best.
Bob R
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