effortjoy

Day seven and I am facing the worst night because Friday night is when I would drink the most. The voice on Friday afternoons never stops: you worked so hard, you deserve a drink...how else will you relax from the week? Etc....
Can you guys please give me some of your own ways to fight to the "I deserve a drink" voice?

doggonecarl

AVRT is what worked for me, which stands for Addictive Voice Recognition Technique.

AVRT in a Nutshell

Yes, it's a voice. A darn insistent one. But you don't have to give in to it. Fight it. Tell it, "I'm not going to throw away 7 days. That's what I worked hard to do. I can get through this."

All cravings pass...unless you give in. Then they start all over again.

Stay strong!

Luling

I deserve to wake up without a hangover in the morning.
I deserve to be proud of myself by staying sober.
I deserve to spend an evening doing something enriching, such as reading a good book or practicing my drawing.
I deserve to be healthy and fit.
I deserve to be the person I've always wanted to be.

My dog deserves a nice long walk.
My family deserves a fully engaged wife/mom.

Live2Run25

Think of how great you'll feel tomorrow waking up with no hangover, and knowing that you didn't blow all your hard work because of that damn persistant little voice. It's just not worth it. Can you got to a movie, or even maybe go on a nice walk? How about make a nice dinner? You got this. Friday's for me now are about doing all the things I missed out doing when I was drunk. Think of Friday nights as a gift and not "i can't drink anymore" Have fun!

sugarbear1

I'd tell it that I might entertain it tomorrow, but not today.

Then I'd find something else that would help me--reading, a movie, some craft project, cooking a nice meal...anything other than drinking.

Tomorrow always became today, so I never did entertain it in the last 13 months. It seems to have disappeared now.

walktheline1

When I get that feeling I treat myself with something else: a nice meal, a new toy, a concert, etc. If that doesn't work I run, cycle, lift weights, etc. until the urge passes and I go to sleep. So far I always wake up happier for it. :-)

TimW

I'm at the end of Day 5 still sober, which is a June record. Basically I've been going to bed early with some chocolate or potato chips. I've been tempted to drink a few times, as that would give the day / night 'meaning', but I've been getting through on the intelligent thought: How does drinking now help me?

I guess at some stage I am planning to drink in future. But it won't be after a week of work.

One thing I can say is, the longer between your last drink and the next, the better off you are. Almost a week ago I had four days, then drank on day five, but I wasn't back to square one. This day five is much different than the last one. The numbers can weigh you down, the worry that no matter how long you stay sober, one drink will ruin it all. And that's just not true. You can't do six hours, well tomorrow do five. You can't do 24, well tomorrow do 12. Someone said to me the other day, if you can do just one day sober, then you can be sober forever. Cravings, anxiety, you've already proved you could beat it before, so there's no reason you can't beat it again.

When I first came here, I couldn't beat 2 days. But I found once I did manage to get through 2 days, since then I've been able to get that number more easily. Getting through the four days last week was a rough slog. This week has been tough too, but it's nowhere near as bad as it's been.

If you've been getting stuck at 7 days, then just make it through to day 8 one time, and you won't regret it. Staying sober is like working muscles. The longer you go without a drink, the longer you will be able to go.

Always ask: How does this help me?

Cinderblock18

I really dislike that Addictive Voice. I'm realizing all it says are lies, lies, lies. I ask God to give me the strength to ignore the voice, and to realize all the promises the voice gives are empty. You can do it!!

pinkdog

You have to flip your thinking. What is good about having a drink? Why do you deserve to be sick? Do you deserve to be guilty? sick? I believe it is necessary to see alcohol in a negative way. Look at what the alcohol takes away. It is not a reward. It is a punishment. The best reward you can give yourself is sobriety. Sobriety rocks! I'm 2 years sober. Not going back. I don't want to be sick and ashamed ever again. Hugs!

SamanthaIam

Another thought: a drink is NOT a reward. It's actually punishment. Just think of all the horrible things alcohol can, will and has done to you. Why would you deserve that after all your hard work?

artsoul

The first Friday night was the hardest for me, too. The ironic thing is, I didn't even go out on Friday nights. I'm self-employed and work out of my home so all days are the same to me - I'm just as likely to work on Saturday as any other day.

Basically, it was the idea of Friday that I was reacting to - it was all in my head. Just one of a million reasons my addiction had for allowing me to drink.

How I coped was by getting carryout from a favorite restaurant (something to look forward to at the hour when I used to start drinking - and eating really does help with the cravings). Then I spent the evening on SR, soaking up ideas and inspiration.

It really, really helps if you can stay in the moment. We're usually OK in the present moment. It's when we start getting in our head about the future or imagining that everyone is out there having fun (which isn't the truth), that we make it worse on ourselves.

Learning we can get through a tough spot (and don't have to always have a great day) is a real victory.

Lots of great ideas here - great topic, too!

Fernaceman

That is so true. For me, all days were pretty much the same. I didn't drink or use any more or less than any other day. Every day was a party.

It was an excuse and lie my brain was telling me to try to convince me to give in.

wonderfullife

I know I have said this before but.....Have a nice large protein smoothie, go for a walk or some other exercise even for 30 minutes and then check back in with the brain. you might be surprised at the answer. good luck. same battle here by the way.

Cinderblock18

It really, really helps if you can stay in the moment. We're usually OK in the present moment. It's when we start getting in our head about the future or imagining that everyone is out there having fun (which isn't the truth), that we make it worse on ourselves.

That is exactly how I feel. Usually fine in the moment, but it's thinking about the future that makes me feel like I'm missing out on something. Thanks for sharing....must get out of my head

flutter

I'm not sure when it happened but somewhere along the line in my recovery work, what I deserved was to be healthy and sane for all of my hard work, not to continue that type of misery. I still cringe whenever I hear people say that "I need a drink", "I deserve a drink!", if they only knew how messed up that can be.

What part of drinking do you feel you deserve (I'm somewhat analytical, and like to break things down a bit when I think about them). The relaxation? The buzz? At what cost.. The hangover, the self destruction/shame/guilt/ruined next day/2 week bender/headache/stomache ache (and so on). It takes time.. it's not supposed to be effortless, but the difficulty of this journey is really worth coming out on the other side centered, healthy, and well intended in life.

serious

you worked hard, but you worked even harder on staying sober. why would you want to mess that up?
you'll feel so much better tomorrow.
don't listen to that voice. it's not you talking.
go to bed early, shut off your phone and avoid any situation than can compromise your sobriety. please come back tomorrow and post that you started day 8 clean and sober.

p.s. ... and no hangover.

Jimuk

Freaky friday voice's hey, the little fella's been sat on my shoulder all day. "Its Friday, Its Friday get hammered you're are such a great bloke and soooo funny when you're hammered"

No way Pal, take a hike.

Thanks for this Thread effortjoy and everyones input.

Scolova

Agree with the others; It's just another day, just another excuse for the AV to use.
I'm extremely grateful for rejecting the voice so quick, strong and for so many months now. The thought of a congratulatory drink doesn't cross my mind...
except when I think back to how things use to be.

GiGi13

Once you get passed this friday...and i have faith that you will! think of how much of an accomplishment it will be..and each friday will come and pass and get easier and easier for you!! stay strong!!

freshstart57

When my AV pipes up, even tho it is much quieter now than it was back then, I don't tell it to wait till tomorrow. I say, 'How about never? Is never good for you?'. This strengthens my feeling of relief of never having to go through that hell ever again, and my resolve to never change my mind.

When those feelings of missing out or grieving over lost rituals like Friday night came to me, I told myself that those thoughts were pointing me back to drinking, and therefore were pure Alcoholic Voice, not mine. That AV would have me drunk and dead, and I won't have it.