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Were you told or did you see it first?

Old 06-20-2012, 12:31 PM
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A simple guy making his way
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Were you told or did you see it first?

I was overhearing someone at work worried about a son that is entering rehab. Her whole family had an intervention and told him he had a problem.

Made me think about myself. No one ever told me that I had a problem. I saw what I had done and came to understand it needed to be addressed. It took a while but it was by my own decisions.

That made me curious about others.

Where you told about your addiction the first time or did you know and took action alone. Or even both?

I think it probably makes little difference since everyone here wants to get better just how we came to the realization we needed help.
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Old 06-20-2012, 12:34 PM
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I'm a very self-aware person (as far as I can tell. 'high self-monitor' in shrink language) so I realized quickly I was dependent shortly after it started to happen. only after the consequences mounted did I have thoughts of addressing the issue, which I guess is normal.
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Old 06-20-2012, 12:47 PM
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I knew but it took my husband realizing it too before I did anything.
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Old 06-20-2012, 12:51 PM
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That seems common. One thing I learned at my 2.3 rehabs is that there are certainly varying degrees of devastation that brings one to recovery.

Everyone there was a little different.

Some needed others to see it first along with them. Others had no one like myself. Others would not have seen it unless an intervention. Yet others a near death experience.

Glad we are all here though!
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Old 06-20-2012, 01:14 PM
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I saw it for myself for a really, really long. Had to convince my husband. The further away I get from my sobriety date, the more perspective I have in a "holy crap, I can't believe I did that!" kind of way that scares the living **** out of me. That's in reference to the hiding wine and the insane things I would do to procure wine. That last line in and of itself has really kept me sober. It was an exhausting way to live.
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Old 06-20-2012, 01:22 PM
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My mom has been warning me for years. I'm in my lower 20's so I took it with a grain of salt and kept going. I started blacking out alot and saying and doing things I was horribly embarrased/ashamed of the next day. Finally my dad ended up hospitalized after a 3 week bender (now in Rehab) and when I went to visit him, It all seemed to click.
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Old 06-20-2012, 04:38 PM
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Well, my Dad told me I was drinking too much quite a few years ago, but whether I really listened or not, I don't know. Somehow I doubt it. Because if I had, I would have actually quit then. And not just made a wholebuncha rules and carried on.
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Old 06-20-2012, 04:46 PM
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My parents were worried about me. I knew that I had unhealthy drinking habits but it wasn't until I suffered consequences in my relationships that I began to think that I needed to stop what I was doing. And it's only in hindsight, that you can look back and see the toll that drinking took on you. The smaller things, that you don't notice at first. Those small things build up though...
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Old 06-20-2012, 05:14 PM
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Ironically, it was my alkie husband who first told me I needed help. Then my 17 year old son. I was the last one to figure it out ... my body even told me before my brain could accept it ... waking up with the shakes, dry heaving every morning, needing to drink a couple of shots fresh out of bed in the a.m. so I could feel normal ... it all added up to a point where there was no more denying it.
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Old 06-20-2012, 05:17 PM
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I was a pro at hiding it from my extended family or friends. I would never drink more than maybe a glass or two of wine when around them.
Around hubby however, I would get smashed constantly. Hubby started telling me about 3 to 4 years ago he was worried but he would never do more than that. It took me to decide to stop.
I probably would've stopped had someone sprung an intervention on me, in fact I was almost begging for one, I knew I had a problem but I didn't know how to stop.
Just celebrated my 6mos sober.
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Old 06-20-2012, 05:35 PM
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My father drank every night probably as a result I've never drank with my parents or in their house. So they would have no idea.

When I tell my wife that I'm quitting she says she'll believe it when she sees it. But she has never complained about my drinking. I'm more of a binge drinker so she'll complain about me being sick or making a mess. Drinking has never resulting in me letting my family down through being hungover or drunk though. My wife probably just thinks I like alcohol. Her family history has no alcoholism as far as I can see as she can't (she's Japanese) stomach alcohol herself. Basically she's wouldn't have the experience to know.

Personally I noticed it for myself. I began to stop having a good time when drunk. Then once I was told to leave a bar as I was annoying other customers. I was mortified and then shocked when I felt I hadn't done much wrong. This incident led to introspection and then to this site. The more I read the more I could see glimpses of myself. With this and my family history (both sides) of alcoholism I decided to stop before it became inevitably worse.

Still don't know where I stand. Once I get by the first Saturday night I am generally ok-ish. When drinking I don't have the will power to resist and when not drinking my will power is super strong.
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Old 06-20-2012, 05:41 PM
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I knew for years I was drinking too much. Always hid it from everyone. The empty fifths and pints would pile up in my hiding spots till i could sneak out and toss'em on trash night. Never a dui, yeah I'd black out, always went to work the next day got it done, even flourished. 10 years down the road now, finally quitting. God what a waste. Wish I had it to do over. If you think you're drinking too much, then you probably are. Don't what for someone to tell you, it very well may not happen.
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Old 06-20-2012, 07:14 PM
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About 10 yrs ago friends told me I had a drinking problem and 1 by 1 stopped hanging out with me. It wasn't until about 4 yrs ago that I realized I had a problem.
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Old 06-20-2012, 07:23 PM
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I hear everyone here,, but it seems everyone has a s/o and really hard to find someone for support that is single and cannot have a normal healthy relationship. I really feel I am out of sorts because, I refuse to have a boyfriend or whatever till I sort myself. How is it with your current s/o?
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Old 06-20-2012, 07:28 PM
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I knew I had a problem and intervened on myself. I called up a rehab and booked myself in. I was actually looking forward to treatment and getting out of the hell I was living in.
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Old 06-20-2012, 07:42 PM
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I was starting to think I had a problem so I did some googling for info and found SR. After reading here awhile, I KNEW I had a problem. So basically you guys told me. Thank you.
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Old 06-20-2012, 10:55 PM
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I've known for about 9 years that I'm alcoholic. It's taken all sorts to get me where I am today. An ex boyfriend/drinking partner died 4 years ago of alcoholic liver disease (at the grand old age of 26) I went to see his body in the funeral home and even THAT didn't stop me.
On April 4th this year I hit the depths of despair with my problem and with the help of SR and AA I'm battling this monster one day at a time. I haven't picked up a drink since then and I don't intend to!
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Old 06-21-2012, 12:27 AM
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I knew it was time to quit and I physically felt unwell, after 8 or 10 years of daily drinking I still continued until i bloated so badly and had right side pain in my upper quadrent that i went to hospital and was told to stop.

I have not drank since that day as I was terrified!

I wonder if I would have stopped if I had not been told by a medical professional? sadly I doubt it.

Thank god for that day as my life is so much better in every single way.
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Old 06-21-2012, 04:08 AM
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i've always been the big drinker in the family. I knew it and ignored it.

it took about 25 years and numerous ruins (including health problems of neuro, cardiac and flirting with diabetes) many waving flags before i WANTED to stop.

sometimes i still romance booze and can't figure out why.
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Old 06-21-2012, 04:29 AM
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I knew in my mid 20's that I had a problem. I kept thinking it would go away by itself for about 20 years after that.
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