desertsong

Several of us took my sponsor out today to celebrate her sobriety birthday ... 28 YEARS. Wow. As I struggle to add to my 90+ days, here is this lovely lady ... who has mega health problems and other challenges ... and still maintains her sobriety through it all. I want to be like her. I want what she has. She is such an inspiration to me ... been through so much ... I haven't experienced a fraction of what she's been through and yet I whine about how tough it is not to drink, how MY problems are different, and blah blah blah.

Perspective. That's what it's all about.

Whenever we're in doubt as to whether or not we can "do this" ... remember, it really CAN be done. Whether we come to SR and read the inspiring stories of folks here with multiple years of sobriety, or whether we go to AA and listen to the stories of the old-timers, or WHATEVER we do ... it CAN be done. My sponsor is an ever-present reminder to me that no matter what life throws in your face, if you want a better life and are willing to do the work, that better life is definitely within your grasp. I need people like that in my life to show me that my "problems" are not unique and that I can get and stay sober in spite of them. We alkies tend to think that we are "different" from the rest of the herd ... but in reality, we're no different than anyone else. Throw that idea away and just look at YOU ... if my sponsor has taught me anything (and she's taught me more than I can absorb in early sobriety, darn her) ... it's that you are NOT unique. Part of the reason I drank was because NOBODY could understand me, NOBODY could understand what I live with, NOBODY could relate to MY issues, and ad nauseum. Yes, I was having a pity party where the only guest was ME.

I love having a sponsor who kicks my a** on a regular basis. God love her. She keeps me honest. I guess all I would end with this is ... get people in your life who will kick your butt when you need it. Sobriety is a tough thing to do alone ... a lot of us DRANK alone, so getting sober alone is not necessarily a good idea. We need the perspective of others, whether they are other AA's, good friends who understand/accept you ... whatever. This addiction THRIVES on isolation. Even if SR is all you have, use the HECK out of it. Don't do this alone. Nobody understands an alkie like another alkie. So put it out there and don't look back. The only thing you have to lose is your addiction. Seems like a fair trade.

Hevyn

28 yrs. - what an amazing achievement. It's wonderful to hear you so positive, desert. You're right, knowing that someone can overcome hardships & get over those hurdles encourages all of us. I always felt different, and so alone. Now I finally know that's not true. Congratulations on your 90+ days - you're obviously learning and growing every day.

CarolD

thanks for shareing this strong message of hope with us....
Well done on your recovery time..

EXM6

Absolutely loved, loved, LOVED, reading this post. Thank you SO much for sharing. First of all, it's sooo inspiring to hear about those who have managed to make it 28 years. We can ALL have 28 years, and your sponsor is proof of that.

I relate to this statement on SO many levels. I grew up in foster care, played around with being the bad kid for awhile, and in my adulthood made a ton of "normal" friends... that didn't realise behaviours that they had been learning from birth, I had to teach myself as an adult. Most of the time I was able to have a sense of humour about it... but some times I fell into that same pit of longing for someone to understand me. "They just don't get it, they just don't get me.." Whan bloody whan whan. Pity party, exactly. Everyone has issues and everyone feels misunderstood when the going gets tough. While our problems may differ, we all still have problems, so we're all together in that. Wish I could go back and slap my drunk ass silly.

haha thanks again for sharing this!