story74

Ugh. I'm so sick of this. Yet again, a cancelation for visitation for NO good reason. I don't get it. I just don't get it. How could you cancel on your son? He hasn't seen him for 3 weeks! Has canceled 2 times in a row. He is now 2 months behind on child support. Hasn't mentioned it. I'm praying he goes to jail. That would make me giggle. It would prove to his delusional family, that yes, he does have a problem. That maybe it was a bad choice to allow his ***** to come meet everyone, and completely dismiss me and my son...after 16 years! I rubbed his mothers feet! And his mother tells me, "welll, I'm not sure he is an addict". Really woman? Well, I'm in the trenches and he has left us to starve and has abandoned his son. So, yes, I want him in jail. So, he hasn't paid child support in 2 months and texts me to verify visitation. Then he texts me out of the blue..."hey, we can me tomorrow if that is easier for you. I know it is the last day of school" REALLY? Lmao! All the sudden he is mr. Considerate? Yea, jerk, I just applied for food stamps because you are a deadbeat. So manipulative. He was manipulative last time too. Its like just be a man and leave us alone! Know you are no good for us and go away! My lawyer is so smart. When I first told her the story, she said "honey, they don't come back. This is the best decision you will ever make" after the divorce she said, " just give him a couple years". My gut says he is getting worse. I am hoping he will just go away. He offers nothing. But, I'm following court orders...2 hrs a week. Its just really hurts that he can't even give 2 hours to our son. TWO HOURS! And he is so selfish he has no clue how much he is hurting our son. Its all about HIM. Thabkfully, my son is young and doing well. He has my dad as a strong man to look up too and is very well loved. But I'm so over this. He has destroyed his family, my relationship with his family, which means his sons relationship with his family, our immediate family and has jepordized my sons future. I haven't said anything to him. When he canceled and said " let's reschedule" I just ignored him. I would love to tell him off, but what's the point?

Whew, that felt good to releas my anger.

The hardest part is what will happen next. Will he continue to be manipulative and cancel visitations and then never hear from him? Why is he canceling....is he getting high? His doc is cocaine...but who knows what he is on now. I will never understand the addicts brain. I try. This one time my sister came over and we had too much to drink. The next day I was so hung I thought, "ok this is what he feels like" x 10. I will never understand.

I'm in a good plaCe. I mean I only her from him on visitation days...via text...nonce a week. He has no clue about us. I'm content. But, I would be even more content if he would just go away. And I have accepted that I have to be strong and realize I just have to deal with this once a week. I just have to follow the rules. When he does decide to see our son, my son is happy. I am trusting my common sense. I'm just have to take it day by day and see what happens. Thank god for this site to educate me and allow me to vent. Without this site, I would not be where I am today. But, damn is it hard and painful.

LoveMeNow

I am so sorry Story for your frustration and pain. :ghug3

Addiction is some evil crap.

Just remember - the best revenge is a well lived life!

Vale

LoveMeNot hit the nail on the head....
"Just remember - the best revenge is a well lived life!"

dollydo

Vent away, you will never understand the behavior of an addict, they are irrational at best.

You have your priorities in place...and...this is good.

suki44883

I actually loved it when my ex would cancel his visitation. I hated having to send her with him and she hated it, too. I don't know how old your son is, but he'll either forget his dad, or when he is older, he'll figure out that he is playing second fiddle in his dad's life. Your ex isn't really hurting anyone other than himself and one day, he will regret ignoring his son.