can't shake it
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Location: indiana
Posts: 12
can't shake it
i have read a lot here about putting the past behind you and moving forward, but it is easier said than done. i can't stop thinking about how lucky i am to not have a DUI or be in jail right now- or i could have seriously hurt myself or my friend whom i was driving.
trying to focus on what DIDN'T happen and prevent being in that situation again, but it is so fresh i cannot shake the guilt. if i am not constantly engaging my mind in something, it goes there and i get depressed all over again. just feeling very defeated right now, my behavior is inexcusable.
trying to focus on what DIDN'T happen and prevent being in that situation again, but it is so fresh i cannot shake the guilt. if i am not constantly engaging my mind in something, it goes there and i get depressed all over again. just feeling very defeated right now, my behavior is inexcusable.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: North America
Posts: 1,628
To whatever degree those past memories produce energy within you, direct that energy towards your objective of never drinking again. The memories and emotions will fade, but what you will need to work on--to ensure it does not fade--is your determination to change your way of life, so that the risks you describe are eliminated forever.
Hang in there Irish; it will get better~~~
Hang in there Irish; it will get better~~~
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,432
I think a lot of us think about the past in early recovery...a lot of us feel guilt, shame., regret...and a lot of us are obsessional types too 
but...however much I mulled over my past, wishing that was different, or I shouldn;t have done that - I couldn't change a second.
Thinking about that too much actually bought me to despair...and from despair, the old alcoholic voices started again....
Don't go there
As hard as it is, you're much better putting your energies in thinking about what you can, and should, do today...
sometimes the best amends is simply a living one...flying straight and true and living right
D
but...however much I mulled over my past, wishing that was different, or I shouldn;t have done that - I couldn't change a second.
Thinking about that too much actually bought me to despair...and from despair, the old alcoholic voices started again....
Don't go there
As hard as it is, you're much better putting your energies in thinking about what you can, and should, do today...
sometimes the best amends is simply a living one...flying straight and true and living right
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,138
While I don't think you should let the guilt get you down, it can be a powerful motivator to make a change. It's been said that guilt is the feeling of denial lifting.
You made a decision that you regret while under the influence. That's ok. Don't beat yourself up. You can decide not to return to such feelings by taking action to control or eliminate your drinking, which is what you're doing.
I understand asking someone not to dwell on something is easier said than done. But the guilt will pass -- and you'll be stronger for this experience. All of us have to have a wake up call -- I'm glad no one got hurt or arrested through yours.
You made a decision that you regret while under the influence. That's ok. Don't beat yourself up. You can decide not to return to such feelings by taking action to control or eliminate your drinking, which is what you're doing.
I understand asking someone not to dwell on something is easier said than done. But the guilt will pass -- and you'll be stronger for this experience. All of us have to have a wake up call -- I'm glad no one got hurt or arrested through yours.
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