Intervention drugs/ alcohol
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 21
Intervention drugs/ alcohol
My AH is an alcoholic and also addicted to paxil and lorazepam. He takes all of these at the same time and over the past year has turned in to a person I do not even know.
My BIL and FIL are staging an intervention along with his boss. He is overseas. The plan is to get him to leave and return to the States with them and enter a treatment facility.
His family is suggesting that I take our kids and visit my side of the family for awhile and basically give my AH some space to deal with this. We have been separated for two months because of his behavior.
I love him so very much. This is causing me such anxiety I cannot function very well. I have known him since he was 14 years old. I am just hurting.
He has admitted to me, my daughter (age 16) and his brother that he knows he is an alcoholic. Do you think this will work? What can I expect from treatment if he does go? What is my role? Should I stay nearby in case I am needed?
My BIL and FIL are staging an intervention along with his boss. He is overseas. The plan is to get him to leave and return to the States with them and enter a treatment facility.
His family is suggesting that I take our kids and visit my side of the family for awhile and basically give my AH some space to deal with this. We have been separated for two months because of his behavior.
I love him so very much. This is causing me such anxiety I cannot function very well. I have known him since he was 14 years old. I am just hurting.
He has admitted to me, my daughter (age 16) and his brother that he knows he is an alcoholic. Do you think this will work? What can I expect from treatment if he does go? What is my role? Should I stay nearby in case I am needed?
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
Sounds like a scary combination of drugs and alcohol. I hope that the intervention is successful and he gets the help he needs with good medical supervision.
What is your role? I believe that the role we have as loved ones is to get help for ourselves. The addict's battle with addiction belongs to them. We can love them. We can let them know we support their efforts toward recovery. But we can't really do the work it's going to take for them to conquer the addiction.
Unfortunately through the process of watching someone we love fall further into their addiction, we change too. At least I can speak for myself here. I became tense, depressed, quick to anger, and in a perpetual state of obsessing about the addict. I lost myself. I didn't take care of myself. I became a different person and I don't think I was any more pleasant to be around than he was. This was very difficult for my husband, daughter and mother to watch. I feared for the addict.....those people feared for me.
If this sounds even remotely like you, then your role is to work on you. Get you healthy. Mentally and physically. How does one do this? Counseling, NarAnon, Al-anon, SR and reading. I strongly suggest any 12 step based support group. There you will learn the things that correspond to what he is learning in rehab. They (whoever "they" are) say that couples who are both in their respective recovery programs have a better chance of relationship survival.
Personally, I work the program I wish the addict in my life would. And it works for me.
gentle hugs
ke
What is your role? I believe that the role we have as loved ones is to get help for ourselves. The addict's battle with addiction belongs to them. We can love them. We can let them know we support their efforts toward recovery. But we can't really do the work it's going to take for them to conquer the addiction.
Unfortunately through the process of watching someone we love fall further into their addiction, we change too. At least I can speak for myself here. I became tense, depressed, quick to anger, and in a perpetual state of obsessing about the addict. I lost myself. I didn't take care of myself. I became a different person and I don't think I was any more pleasant to be around than he was. This was very difficult for my husband, daughter and mother to watch. I feared for the addict.....those people feared for me.
If this sounds even remotely like you, then your role is to work on you. Get you healthy. Mentally and physically. How does one do this? Counseling, NarAnon, Al-anon, SR and reading. I strongly suggest any 12 step based support group. There you will learn the things that correspond to what he is learning in rehab. They (whoever "they" are) say that couples who are both in their respective recovery programs have a better chance of relationship survival.
Personally, I work the program I wish the addict in my life would. And it works for me.
gentle hugs
ke
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