I'm so sick of it all
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 2
I'm so sick of it all
Hi everybody. I´m new to the forum and I´m hoping for some advice concerning my mother.
She's been drinking for 8 years now, she used to be sober for 13 years but then she and my dad got divorced and she startet again.
We have been through alot, as you all must be familier with. But last Sunday night she called me and wanted help, wanted to die and needed me. I have been through similar situtations before, but this is the first time she has asked me to help her find help.
Since it was a sunday night it was hard to figure out what to do (we live in Denmark and the healthcare system litterally comes to a stop during the weekends). Luckely I'm a nursestudent so I was abel to call a few of my colleagues and they forwarded me to a psychiatric hospital as she did NOT want to go to rehab. That was a sign that she really didn't want any help, but I had to send her somewhere since I had school the next day and a 1 year old to take care of
She was at the psychiatric hospital for 2 nights. Now she is on some medicin that will make her sick if she drinks (not sure what it´s called in English). She went to a meeting tuesday but didn´t go yesterday or today even though there where meetings. I called her tonight and asked her why. She came up with a million things, she was painting the bedroom, making pizza etc. etc. etc. I called her out on it, told her she should be focused on her recovery because I never wanted to have to go through another night like sunday night again. Then she, ofcourse, startet yelling. I told her to stop yelling, in a calm matter, and that I was only calling to talk about it. She eventually hung up.
Now my question is (I'm sorry about the long post) what do I do now? I'm so DONE! I know she isn't drinking because of the medicin... but she has to take it on her own from now on and I KNOW she wont do that. She has to go to rehab! She WONT go to meetings and she WONT take the medicin.
I'm gonna cut all contact. I can't do this anymore. But do I wait for her to start drinking again, give her the chance to proof she can do it on her own, even though I know it will fail? Or do I tell her now that I don't want any contact anymore?
Thanks in advance
She's been drinking for 8 years now, she used to be sober for 13 years but then she and my dad got divorced and she startet again.
We have been through alot, as you all must be familier with. But last Sunday night she called me and wanted help, wanted to die and needed me. I have been through similar situtations before, but this is the first time she has asked me to help her find help.
Since it was a sunday night it was hard to figure out what to do (we live in Denmark and the healthcare system litterally comes to a stop during the weekends). Luckely I'm a nursestudent so I was abel to call a few of my colleagues and they forwarded me to a psychiatric hospital as she did NOT want to go to rehab. That was a sign that she really didn't want any help, but I had to send her somewhere since I had school the next day and a 1 year old to take care of
She was at the psychiatric hospital for 2 nights. Now she is on some medicin that will make her sick if she drinks (not sure what it´s called in English). She went to a meeting tuesday but didn´t go yesterday or today even though there where meetings. I called her tonight and asked her why. She came up with a million things, she was painting the bedroom, making pizza etc. etc. etc. I called her out on it, told her she should be focused on her recovery because I never wanted to have to go through another night like sunday night again. Then she, ofcourse, startet yelling. I told her to stop yelling, in a calm matter, and that I was only calling to talk about it. She eventually hung up.
Now my question is (I'm sorry about the long post) what do I do now? I'm so DONE! I know she isn't drinking because of the medicin... but she has to take it on her own from now on and I KNOW she wont do that. She has to go to rehab! She WONT go to meetings and she WONT take the medicin.
I'm gonna cut all contact. I can't do this anymore. But do I wait for her to start drinking again, give her the chance to proof she can do it on her own, even though I know it will fail? Or do I tell her now that I don't want any contact anymore?
Thanks in advance
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 837
imissmymum, you didn't cause this, you can't control this, and you can't cure this. Please think about what I just wrote. There is nothing you can humanly do for your mom that will help it has to come from her wanting recovery more than life itself and this you can not do for her. Take care of yourself and you little one, please find an Al Anon meeting for you it will give you more insite into the disease and you will find strength there for yourself. Keep posting, we're here for you.
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