Newbie :)
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 37
Newbie :)
Hi everyone 
I've attempted this once before and now I'm back for a second shot at sobriety. Unfortunately my willpower caved a few months back and my problem has spiralled out of control again. I managed about 2 weeks. I have a binge drinking problem that started when I was 14 and has got progressively worse (I'm now 23). I am a weekend drinker who won't drink a drop all week and then will get very drunk from Friday to Sunday. It's like a switch goes off in my head when I have those first couple of drinks and I have an uncontrollable urge to drink as much as I physically can. I almost always blackout and I am very lucky and thankful that I have never found myself in a serious situation (yet). I feel extreme guilt and remorse every Monday-Wednesday but by Friday I have managed to convince myself that I don't have a problem and that I am over reacting. The devil on my shoulder can come up with a million reasons why my behaviour 'isn't that bad'. I am aware that this is a ridiculous way to live and I really want to have the strength to change my life. Anyway thanks for reading. Even just looking through everyone else's posts has already helped me immensely. Hope everyone is doing well with their own battles
I've attempted this once before and now I'm back for a second shot at sobriety. Unfortunately my willpower caved a few months back and my problem has spiralled out of control again. I managed about 2 weeks. I have a binge drinking problem that started when I was 14 and has got progressively worse (I'm now 23). I am a weekend drinker who won't drink a drop all week and then will get very drunk from Friday to Sunday. It's like a switch goes off in my head when I have those first couple of drinks and I have an uncontrollable urge to drink as much as I physically can. I almost always blackout and I am very lucky and thankful that I have never found myself in a serious situation (yet). I feel extreme guilt and remorse every Monday-Wednesday but by Friday I have managed to convince myself that I don't have a problem and that I am over reacting. The devil on my shoulder can come up with a million reasons why my behaviour 'isn't that bad'. I am aware that this is a ridiculous way to live and I really want to have the strength to change my life. Anyway thanks for reading. Even just looking through everyone else's posts has already helped me immensely. Hope everyone is doing well with their own battles
instant
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Australia
Posts: 5,711
Hi young gun welcome to SR. You will find a lot of helpful people here and a lot of useful advice. I found reading the Big Book very helpful despite how old it is and the short course on rational recovery (free online). You may also find listening to some of the AA speakers tapes very useful (free online- if you can't find any PM 'day trader' he seems to know many good sources).
It also sounds like you need something useful or re-creational to do on the weekend.
It also sounds like you need something useful or re-creational to do on the weekend.
with Dee. Whats the plan? Plan A: willpower. Result=Failure.............................. Plan B: ?
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
Glad you're back! That "devil on our shoulder" can be very convincing (at least until the next binge is over). It's just so easy, once we feel better, to think we can have some kind of control. It's like a disconnect.....
I had to stay really close to support in the beginning in order not to fall back into denial/rationalization again. The good news is that it does get easier..... just hang in there and know that you're doing something great for yourself!
I had to stay really close to support in the beginning in order not to fall back into denial/rationalization again. The good news is that it does get easier..... just hang in there and know that you're doing something great for yourself!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,564
Hi youngun! I remember you. I hope things will work out better this time. Sometimes we have to be really convinced that it's over. I tried many times to quit, but the last time I had all the proof I needed - I couldn't touch the stuff ever again.
We're glad you're here with us. Keep posting & let us know how it's going.
We're glad you're here with us. Keep posting & let us know how it's going.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 37
My plan for sobriety this time is to attempt not only to stop drinking but to change my lifestyle so that I feel happier. I usually hit the bottle very hard at the weekend because I've been craving an escape and a bit of fun. By Friday I'm seriously keen to get as drunk as possible. There's obviously underlying issues as to why I drink and I need to learn to resolve/cope with them. In a way my drinking isn't the actual problem (although it has definitely become one), it's a symptom (if that makes sense!). I'm always looking to escape my own mind and I've realised how ridiculous it all is. I'd be much better off ignoring that annoying devil who's telling me it's perfectly normal behaviour and a good laugh. So yeah that's the plan...
thesun/instant - I will definitely look up these things, thanks.
aeo1313 - congrats on your 60 hours, good job pal.
Thanks again everyone else, it's a relief to be able to talk about it all
thesun/instant - I will definitely look up these things, thanks.
aeo1313 - congrats on your 60 hours, good job pal.
Thanks again everyone else, it's a relief to be able to talk about it all
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