Accepting...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Japan
Posts: 2
Accepting...
Hello everyone. I am a 28 year old male who is just now realizing that I have a problem. I started drinking back when I was 15 and have drank steadily since then. It started socially Partying on the weekends with friends. This binge drinking lasted through college. Never thought I had a problem. It was just what we all did...everybody drank and had house parties or went to the bar. Looking back I was always getting hammered out of my mind and would be able shake it off the next day. However, in recent years the hangovers have become horrible. I'm not even sure where I'm going with this post other than acknowledging the fact that I have a problem. I cannot control myself once I've had a drink...that drink turns into 5...then eventually a 750ml bottle of vodka is gone and the only reason I stop is I pass out. I experience black outs all the time. My friends bring up events that happened the previous night and I have no memory at all of what they speak of. I seldom drink alone and I usually start in the evening. Been pulled over by the police about 6 times while drunk and have been let go each time. I've been extremely lucky but dumb enough to drink and drive again. This I realize cannot go on. Last year I was on a bender and got behind the wheel and fell asleep only to awaken as my car side swiped the guard rail on the highway and blew a tire out. Called the highway assistance because I was too drunk to figure out how to replace my tire (something I've done sober).
Physically I am in good shape because I work out all the time and eat a whole food diet. However when I get drunk I eat all the crap that I avoid like the plague when sober. The guilt after all this consumes me
I also feel like I dont know who I really am. Pretty sad at 28 years old. I have a bit of social anxiety and drinking takes it away. Enabled to speak freely and stop caring what people think of me. however when I am sober and overcome with guilt my anxiety is even worse. It feels like there is 2 different personalities at constant war with each other. Well I've rambled enough for now. If anyone has read through this hangover dazed post I thank you for listening. I have told myself I want to commit to 30 days sober at leAst to start and see how I feel at the end. Never lasted that long since I started the booze at 15. I wish you all well and the strength to overcome.
Physically I am in good shape because I work out all the time and eat a whole food diet. However when I get drunk I eat all the crap that I avoid like the plague when sober. The guilt after all this consumes me
I also feel like I dont know who I really am. Pretty sad at 28 years old. I have a bit of social anxiety and drinking takes it away. Enabled to speak freely and stop caring what people think of me. however when I am sober and overcome with guilt my anxiety is even worse. It feels like there is 2 different personalities at constant war with each other. Well I've rambled enough for now. If anyone has read through this hangover dazed post I thank you for listening. I have told myself I want to commit to 30 days sober at leAst to start and see how I feel at the end. Never lasted that long since I started the booze at 15. I wish you all well and the strength to overcome.
So it goes
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Manchester UK
Posts: 1,620
Welcome Darkness
You may feel alone, but what you said is certainly similar to me. I drank too much, tried to control it, and couldnt
You say to stop for 30 days, why not try for 3 months or longer, then you may see how dependent or not you are on it
You may also find you prefer life without it.
People said that to me, when I joined, didnt believe them
Do now
Good luck
Billy
You may feel alone, but what you said is certainly similar to me. I drank too much, tried to control it, and couldnt
You say to stop for 30 days, why not try for 3 months or longer, then you may see how dependent or not you are on it
You may also find you prefer life without it.
People said that to me, when I joined, didnt believe them
Do now
Good luck
Billy
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,967
30 days is long enough to feel better and think you don't have a problem. Try at least 90 days or even 180. That is when the real changes start to occur and the clarity arrives. We damage our bodies and don't realize it as that damage won't show up for many more years.
Welcome to SR! Glad you are here!
Welcome to SR! Glad you are here!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Oregon
Posts: 1,348
Welcome to SR Darkness, you'll find a lot of support here. These guys are right, it doesn't get any better, drinking like we do/did only leads in one direction. Well done on recognizing that and coming here!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: France
Posts: 74
Welcome! I'm 28 too and have just done 4 weeks sober! It's been great - you can do it - and keep going one day at a time. My aim is to be sober for life. Good luck and stay with us here - loads of support!!!!!!!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Ireland
Posts: 300
Welcome Darkness, glad you posted. Beginning to read and post on here has been the difference between me drinking or not. I'm only on Day 15 but I have quit drinking for good. When I say to myself, 30 days, 90 days etc I know that I'm just setting myself up to drink again as it's easier to drink even after 28 days or whatever as I've already allowed the future to include drinking. 'What's the difference if I start 2 days earlier?' is the logic there. I cannot drink in moderation, I know I'm an all or nothing person, so now it's gotta be nothing. Anyways each to their own, but I recommend either way you continue on SR, I've had so much support and learned so much in my short (but precious to me!) time here. You will too if you want it. Good luck.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: New England
Posts: 1,067
Welcome friend! Here's a little cliche from the 80's : "Knowing IS half the battle!" -- it's so good to come clean with yourself and realize how drinking affects your life! 30 days without drinking is a great idea! In my experience getting other people involved in your quest will help greatly! Take care and I hope to read more from you soon!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
Posts: 165
hiya...I can really identify with your first post. I am pretty much the female version of you haha! You have come to the right place. I am only on day 11, but already I am beginning to see that not drinking allows you to focus on the issues that really need to be dealt with. Before, I was constantly numbing my emotions and pushing everything away. Now I am open to hear these issues. Quitting alcohol is the necessary step to take if you want to progress in life.
Goodluck.
Goodluck.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Chicago IL
Posts: 11
Hi!
Everything that you've mentioned hits home. Anxiety, driving drunk, crashing! getting pulled over!! blacking out any time im near a bottle. Letting my alter ego take over and ignore right from wrong. That's the worse, when you actually know that the little guy inside you is calling the shots and not you. Good thing is that you are acknowledging that you have a problem. The fact that it happens almost everytime is the issue. Binge drinking is my downfall as well. 1 is never enough and 2 turns into the whole damn bottle.
Anyway, you are not alone. In any situation that you encounter a time limit will not fix your issue. Because if your like me, your going to face a revolving door, its better to not take the first sip.
Who says sober people aren't kool too!?
Everything that you've mentioned hits home. Anxiety, driving drunk, crashing! getting pulled over!! blacking out any time im near a bottle. Letting my alter ego take over and ignore right from wrong. That's the worse, when you actually know that the little guy inside you is calling the shots and not you. Good thing is that you are acknowledging that you have a problem. The fact that it happens almost everytime is the issue. Binge drinking is my downfall as well. 1 is never enough and 2 turns into the whole damn bottle.
Anyway, you are not alone. In any situation that you encounter a time limit will not fix your issue. Because if your like me, your going to face a revolving door, its better to not take the first sip.
Who says sober people aren't kool too!?
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