Let's face the cold, hard facts of addiction....
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Let's face the cold, hard facts of addiction....
I am not starting this thread to start a debate or offend anyone!
I know there are some here who are in recovery or have loved ones n recovery but I believe you are few and far between. Seriously, how many get clean and stay clean??? Rehabs are making billions and the pandemic is not get any better.
At this moment in time, I am angry and I am bitter. My loving husband is gone. He is now a drug addict and not the same person. He is forever changed. And the chances are sooooooooo slim that he will ever be healthy enough for me to be in a relationship with him again.
I am sick of having false hope. It is that false hope (along with fear) that kept me in this situation far longer than I should have stayed.
I need to let go! I need to accept the cold, hard fact about addciton. I need to admit I am powerless over HIS addiction. I need to fix me, the only person I can fix!! Its so simple, its obvious......and yet its so hard!
He really doesn't want to change, he is so weak, and the drugs that control him don't want him to change. It's like they are alive and breathing, this demon possessed being.
If I let go....what happens to him? How do I forget that down deep there is a loving, caring man? How do I abandon a sick person, my husband!!
Oh the conflict!! When will I resolve it, how will I resolve it! I take 1 step forward and 10 steps backward.
I know there are some here who are in recovery or have loved ones n recovery but I believe you are few and far between. Seriously, how many get clean and stay clean??? Rehabs are making billions and the pandemic is not get any better.
At this moment in time, I am angry and I am bitter. My loving husband is gone. He is now a drug addict and not the same person. He is forever changed. And the chances are sooooooooo slim that he will ever be healthy enough for me to be in a relationship with him again.
I am sick of having false hope. It is that false hope (along with fear) that kept me in this situation far longer than I should have stayed.
I need to let go! I need to accept the cold, hard fact about addciton. I need to admit I am powerless over HIS addiction. I need to fix me, the only person I can fix!! Its so simple, its obvious......and yet its so hard!
He really doesn't want to change, he is so weak, and the drugs that control him don't want him to change. It's like they are alive and breathing, this demon possessed being.
If I let go....what happens to him? How do I forget that down deep there is a loving, caring man? How do I abandon a sick person, my husband!!
Oh the conflict!! When will I resolve it, how will I resolve it! I take 1 step forward and 10 steps backward.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 134
Exactly! Some people say that every addict is different, and you can't judge them and just ASSUME they will relapse eventually because that is what statistics say.
On the other hand, some people say that an addict is an addict, they are basically the same deep down, and addicts will eventually do what addicts do..they will use drugs!
Not sure what side of the fence my beliefs fall on concerning this matter, however I do know that addiction is a LIFE LONG SENTENCE. There is no get out of jail free card, no amount of time will heal the sickness, and there's no cure. And THOSE cold, hard facts are terribly frightening.
On the other hand, some people say that an addict is an addict, they are basically the same deep down, and addicts will eventually do what addicts do..they will use drugs!
Not sure what side of the fence my beliefs fall on concerning this matter, however I do know that addiction is a LIFE LONG SENTENCE. There is no get out of jail free card, no amount of time will heal the sickness, and there's no cure. And THOSE cold, hard facts are terribly frightening.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 583
We aren't God. We don't have the power or responsibility to save them. They were just fine when we met them.
God can and will fill/heal us if we seek him first. Whatever Gods plan is he has a weeee bit of advantage over us in knowing the larger/grand plan.
Let Go. Let God.
I struggled with this very thing. In the end lost a loved one. It was God's plan. Many many beautiful things have come out of her death. God spared her and the kids from years of the bitter struggle and hopefully broke a family curse.
We don't know the full picture and we don't have THAT much power over someone else.
Let Go. Let God.
AG
God can and will fill/heal us if we seek him first. Whatever Gods plan is he has a weeee bit of advantage over us in knowing the larger/grand plan.
Let Go. Let God.
I struggled with this very thing. In the end lost a loved one. It was God's plan. Many many beautiful things have come out of her death. God spared her and the kids from years of the bitter struggle and hopefully broke a family curse.
We don't know the full picture and we don't have THAT much power over someone else.
Let Go. Let God.
AG
Originally Posted by LoveMeNot 
I am not starting this thread to start a debate or offend anyone!
I know there are some here who are in recovery or have loved ones n recovery but I believe you are few and far between. Seriously, how many get clean and stay clean??? Rehabs are making billions and the pandemic is not get any better.
At this moment in time, I am angry and I am bitter. My loving husband is gone. He is now a drug addict and not the same person. He is forever changed. And the chances are sooooooooo slim that he will ever be healthy enough for me to be in a relationship with him again.
I am sick of having false hope. It is that false hope (along with fear) that kept me in this situation far longer than I should have stayed.
I need to let go! I need to accept the cold, hard fact about addciton. I need to admit I am powerless over HIS addiction. I need to fix me, the only person I can fix!! Its so simple, its obvious......and yet its so hard!
He really doesn't want to change, he is so weak, and the drugs that control him don't want him to change. It's like they are alive and breathing, this demon possessed being.
If I let go....what happens to him? How do I forget that down deep there is a loving, caring man? How do I abandon a sick person, my husband!!
Oh the conflict!! When will I resolve it, how will I resolve it! I take 1 step forward and 10 steps backward.
I know there are some here who are in recovery or have loved ones n recovery but I believe you are few and far between. Seriously, how many get clean and stay clean??? Rehabs are making billions and the pandemic is not get any better.
At this moment in time, I am angry and I am bitter. My loving husband is gone. He is now a drug addict and not the same person. He is forever changed. And the chances are sooooooooo slim that he will ever be healthy enough for me to be in a relationship with him again.
I am sick of having false hope. It is that false hope (along with fear) that kept me in this situation far longer than I should have stayed.
I need to let go! I need to accept the cold, hard fact about addciton. I need to admit I am powerless over HIS addiction. I need to fix me, the only person I can fix!! Its so simple, its obvious......and yet its so hard!
He really doesn't want to change, he is so weak, and the drugs that control him don't want him to change. It's like they are alive and breathing, this demon possessed being.
If I let go....what happens to him? How do I forget that down deep there is a loving, caring man? How do I abandon a sick person, my husband!!
Oh the conflict!! When will I resolve it, how will I resolve it! I take 1 step forward and 10 steps backward.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Chicago area
Posts: 4,269
Originally Posted by anvilhead
If I let go....what happens to him?
that statement implies that you are somehow responsible for HIM, that you are somehow his SOLUTION.
that statement implies that you are somehow responsible for HIM, that you are somehow his SOLUTION.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
Loveme not,
It is not offensive in any way.It is why we are all here.It is why we ALL struggle.
You are not a lesser person for it.You are arguably a better person.
What is so hard about higher order thinking is that it is so COUNTERINTUITIVE.
It offends us to be told.....walk past that drowning person...do NOT throw them a life
preserver....let them swim or drown on their own.
If you did that to a child in a swimming pool----society would make the just decision that you are a monster to be shunned.And rightfully so!
But I have learned the HARD way,and through patient learning and such great teachers on SR(thanks outtolunch/anvilhead/hope2be----that this does not APPLY TO ADDICTION!
The proper way to approach addiction and quantum physics make no intuitive sense,
yet it is the truth.
The TRUTH is my friend (not even a wife/lover/any of that) is long gone and what
inhabits her now will drain me of my last dime and ruin my life if I let her.The TRUTH is
that she lost her home & family and now lives as a live-in slave to a felon.
The absolute HARDEST part is knowing there is nothing exceptional about EITHER of
our stories.She is an addict,I am a recovering codie.
ONCE AN ADDICT,ALWAYS AN ADDICT.How I fought those words,tooth and nail,with everything I had.Because those words COULD NOT,SIMPLY COULD NOT....apply to her!
Then I found SR.
Then I found peace.
I will always wish her well.I will pray she finds recovery.But I will not feed the devil
that murdered her soul.
It is not offensive in any way.It is why we are all here.It is why we ALL struggle.
You are not a lesser person for it.You are arguably a better person.
What is so hard about higher order thinking is that it is so COUNTERINTUITIVE.
It offends us to be told.....walk past that drowning person...do NOT throw them a life
preserver....let them swim or drown on their own.
If you did that to a child in a swimming pool----society would make the just decision that you are a monster to be shunned.And rightfully so!
But I have learned the HARD way,and through patient learning and such great teachers on SR(thanks outtolunch/anvilhead/hope2be----that this does not APPLY TO ADDICTION!
The proper way to approach addiction and quantum physics make no intuitive sense,
yet it is the truth.
The TRUTH is my friend (not even a wife/lover/any of that) is long gone and what
inhabits her now will drain me of my last dime and ruin my life if I let her.The TRUTH is
that she lost her home & family and now lives as a live-in slave to a felon.
The absolute HARDEST part is knowing there is nothing exceptional about EITHER of
our stories.She is an addict,I am a recovering codie.
ONCE AN ADDICT,ALWAYS AN ADDICT.How I fought those words,tooth and nail,with everything I had.Because those words COULD NOT,SIMPLY COULD NOT....apply to her!
Then I found SR.
Then I found peace.
I will always wish her well.I will pray she finds recovery.But I will not feed the devil
that murdered her soul.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 559
I completely understand where you are coming from. Letting go is a long process. It has been a year, and I am not 100% but I am getting better each day.
Let yourself feel. Go through the emotions. Heal. It takes time. I was VERY angry at my xah, and still am. Who leaves a family without thinking about the consequences. It still makes me a little sad when we do something special and he isn't there. HE is missing out on so much he will never get back.
I, too, don't think there is any hope for my addict. I hate to be pessimistic, but he was smoking marijuana are entire relationship. He lost a great job because he couldn't pass a drug test and was smoking the next day. He lost health insurance and pension. I was a stay at home mom. And, i missed the warning sign. But, I couldn't control him. He did what he wanted and eventually moved on to cocaine. he lost his family and business and that wasn't his bottom. He has surrounded himself with people who pay for everything for him and he is maintaing. I don't see a happy future for him. He has no follow thru and he is so incinsistent. But, maybe he will surprise me. Who knows. That is the hardest part. Everyday I wonder how this will end. Do I have to deal with someone who can maintain for the rest of my life? ugh.
As far as helping him. You can't. I say this and just the other day suggested he go to rehab. Which was met with a "I am sober, f-you". But after I made that offer I had that moment of, "will this be the time he says, yes, please help me?" nope. But I offered. I tried.
Go through the emotions because what you are feeling is very valid. It isn't fair and it isn't right. You can't save him. There is nothing you can say or do. Just focus on healing.
Hang in there.
Let yourself feel. Go through the emotions. Heal. It takes time. I was VERY angry at my xah, and still am. Who leaves a family without thinking about the consequences. It still makes me a little sad when we do something special and he isn't there. HE is missing out on so much he will never get back.
I, too, don't think there is any hope for my addict. I hate to be pessimistic, but he was smoking marijuana are entire relationship. He lost a great job because he couldn't pass a drug test and was smoking the next day. He lost health insurance and pension. I was a stay at home mom. And, i missed the warning sign. But, I couldn't control him. He did what he wanted and eventually moved on to cocaine. he lost his family and business and that wasn't his bottom. He has surrounded himself with people who pay for everything for him and he is maintaing. I don't see a happy future for him. He has no follow thru and he is so incinsistent. But, maybe he will surprise me. Who knows. That is the hardest part. Everyday I wonder how this will end. Do I have to deal with someone who can maintain for the rest of my life? ugh.
As far as helping him. You can't. I say this and just the other day suggested he go to rehab. Which was met with a "I am sober, f-you". But after I made that offer I had that moment of, "will this be the time he says, yes, please help me?" nope. But I offered. I tried.
Go through the emotions because what you are feeling is very valid. It isn't fair and it isn't right. You can't save him. There is nothing you can say or do. Just focus on healing.
Hang in there.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
( I forgot to add that I am as offended as you are by the billion dollar
'rehab' industry--with their glossy pamphlets showing pictures of radiantly
happy families)
--this can be YOU (just give us money!)
'rehab' industry--with their glossy pamphlets showing pictures of radiantly
happy families)
--this can be YOU (just give us money!)
Curmudgeon, Electrical Engineer, Guitar God Wannabe
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Where the mighty arms of Atlas hold the heavens from the Earth
Posts: 3,403
If I let go....what happens to him? How do I forget that down deep there is a loving, caring man? How do I abandon a sick person, my husband!!
As far as "abandoning" your husband goes, a better, healthier way to frame it is to detach, with love. You are responsible for your own health, your own happiness, your own well-being. And if you stay coupled to him, you will, in your own way, become just as sick as he is. Personally, even though I don't know you, I don't want to see that happen to you any more than it already has.
If you have not already, please find an Al Anon or Nar Anon meeting local to you and go in with your eyes and ears open. It's time you take care of you.
Best,
ZoSo
I'm no angel!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: tampa, fl
Posts: 6,728
"If I let go....what happens to him?
that statement implies that you are somehow responsible for HIM, that you are somehow his SOLUTION. do me a favor, take a good hard look at the situation AS IT IS. are you having the desired affect upon HIS problem? "
I agree, sometimes we codies feel that we are more powerful than addiction itself, IMHO, we need to accept the reality of the situation and not project into the future and attempt to place the burden of others choices on our back.
that statement implies that you are somehow responsible for HIM, that you are somehow his SOLUTION. do me a favor, take a good hard look at the situation AS IT IS. are you having the desired affect upon HIS problem? "
I agree, sometimes we codies feel that we are more powerful than addiction itself, IMHO, we need to accept the reality of the situation and not project into the future and attempt to place the burden of others choices on our back.
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Thank you all. I have been back sliding the past few days ever since I told him face to face...it was over, I am done, I want and deserve better! I am not sure if it reality hitting me, or its the 4th day of quitting smoking or PMS - or all of the above.
I know what needs to be done, I know the mindset I must have, I know I must ask God for strength and courage. I know I must let go and let God! I can't worry about him any longer. I can't but into his warp sense of the facts/reality. AND I can NOT let let his anger and hurt about my decision put fear back in me. (I hate when people I love are cold to me and I will add that to the list of thinks I need to work on!)
He is an active addict and that is just NOT what I want for a partner, a friend or a husband! Plain and simple!
I know what needs to be done, I know the mindset I must have, I know I must ask God for strength and courage. I know I must let go and let God! I can't worry about him any longer. I can't but into his warp sense of the facts/reality. AND I can NOT let let his anger and hurt about my decision put fear back in me. (I hate when people I love are cold to me and I will add that to the list of thinks I need to work on!)
He is an active addict and that is just NOT what I want for a partner, a friend or a husband! Plain and simple!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Minneapolis
Posts: 924
will say again that, although I am ALL FOR quitting smoking (!!!) timing can be crucial...
our codependency is cunning, baffling & powerful
quitting smoking now may just set you up to be a basket case and you'll need a "fix" of the ex. just saying it's possibly a very sneaky backhanded way for your own addiction to operate.
also in some of my own history of twisted thinking I would consider my own failure, such as in trying to avoid sugar, or another cup of coffee...or another episode in some addictive HBO series...seriously, I would start to compare...and then have "sympathy" for his addiction to crack...I would compare my own addictions to his, and then I would minimize that horrible drug and it's totally destructive consequences...and compare it to my consumption of ice cream.
seriously...I realize cigs are horrific, I quit when I lost two friends to throat cancer...just watch yourself on your backsliding in codependency.
don't let something positive you are trying to do for yourself backslide you into minimizing relapse.
if you are serious about quitting smoking then set yourself up with extra support!!
(I realize this post may seem kind of wack... but am posting it anyway...you never know)
our codependency is cunning, baffling & powerful
quitting smoking now may just set you up to be a basket case and you'll need a "fix" of the ex. just saying it's possibly a very sneaky backhanded way for your own addiction to operate.
also in some of my own history of twisted thinking I would consider my own failure, such as in trying to avoid sugar, or another cup of coffee...or another episode in some addictive HBO series...seriously, I would start to compare...and then have "sympathy" for his addiction to crack...I would compare my own addictions to his, and then I would minimize that horrible drug and it's totally destructive consequences...and compare it to my consumption of ice cream.
seriously...I realize cigs are horrific, I quit when I lost two friends to throat cancer...just watch yourself on your backsliding in codependency.
don't let something positive you are trying to do for yourself backslide you into minimizing relapse.
if you are serious about quitting smoking then set yourself up with extra support!!
(I realize this post may seem kind of wack... but am posting it anyway...you never know)
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Dallas TX
Posts: 2,282
Not wack at all,lesliej.
we ALL do it.......
(how much could one text hurt...just to know if she's alive)
(just checkout her facebook....see if she's active)
(scan the obits in the paper for her name....sooner or later!)
(re-examine history....maybe her messages were NOT as nonsensical as they seemed)
Addicts relapse.Codies relapse.NEVER let down your guard.
we ALL do it.......
(how much could one text hurt...just to know if she's alive)
(just checkout her facebook....see if she's active)
(scan the obits in the paper for her name....sooner or later!)
(re-examine history....maybe her messages were NOT as nonsensical as they seemed)
Addicts relapse.Codies relapse.NEVER let down your guard.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Minneapolis
Posts: 924
hahahahahahahahahaha
OMG...
was just now re-reading text history to see if the messages were really all that wacked...
codie for life, it's just a daily (or moment by moment) reprieve.
at least I don't have him moving back in today, progress is palpable.
OMG...
was just now re-reading text history to see if the messages were really all that wacked...
codie for life, it's just a daily (or moment by moment) reprieve.
at least I don't have him moving back in today, progress is palpable.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 326
Originally Posted by LoveMeNot
...I know there are some here who are in recovery or have loved ones n recovery but I believe you are few and far between. Seriously, how many get clean and stay clean???...My loving husband is gone. He is now a drug addict and not the same person. He is forever changed. And the chances are sooooooooo slim that he will ever be healthy enough for me to be in a relationship with him again.
I am sick of having false hope. It is that false hope (along with fear) that kept me in this situation far longer than I should have stayed.
I need to let go! I need to accept the cold, hard fact about addciton....
I am sick of having false hope. It is that false hope (along with fear) that kept me in this situation far longer than I should have stayed.
I need to let go! I need to accept the cold, hard fact about addciton....
The thing is you never know which will be in the 15% and which will be in the 85%. And they all, even the 15% make you miserable if you let them.
The other cold hard fact is: they can stop, all they have to do is decide to.
The most important cold hard fact is: you can't in any way influence that decision: not by 'helping', not by researching the problem, not by arranging treatment, not by being 'supportive', not by throwing them out, not by calling the police, not by forgiving them, not by giving them a second chance, not by ANYTHING.
The last cold hard fact is that nothing we do can make them happy or healthy...and NOTHING they can do can make us unhappy or unhealthy. They are doing it to themselves, and so are we.
Getting there!!
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 5,750
Is it really around 15%? Wow, that is smaller percentage than I thought.
LOL Leslie, Thank you for the advice. I will be careful but I really needed to quit. I was really smoking a lot (3pks) and I also just can't afford it any longer. But your right, I have compared my addiction to his. You know what I found out? I can quit as long as he is NOT around! and I am like taking care of ME!!
LOL Leslie, Thank you for the advice. I will be careful but I really needed to quit. I was really smoking a lot (3pks) and I also just can't afford it any longer. But your right, I have compared my addiction to his. You know what I found out? I can quit as long as he is NOT around!
and I am like taking care of ME!!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,698
Hi Love me Not, I was addicted to crystal back in my 20's(over 26 years ago) and when I was DONE i was DONE. I had to change everything in my life. Now my son is the same age I was when I decided I was done, I can hope he also says one day "I am done". Right now he is in SLE but it is less than one year and I cannot slip into complacency.
I know he is feeling some of the discomfort of his choices, but when people are young, they also feel completely untouchable. I believe there is more than 15% who recover, not with any hard facts, just knowing that many people I partied with when I was young are good members of society. Some went to jail for a while, some lost their kids for a while, all of us hit a bottom along the line. Addictive behavior can be managed if the person who is an addict wants to change.
Hugs and prayers,
Teresa
I know he is feeling some of the discomfort of his choices, but when people are young, they also feel completely untouchable. I believe there is more than 15% who recover, not with any hard facts, just knowing that many people I partied with when I was young are good members of society. Some went to jail for a while, some lost their kids for a while, all of us hit a bottom along the line. Addictive behavior can be managed if the person who is an addict wants to change.
Hugs and prayers,
Teresa
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: St. Louis, Mo. USA
Posts: 265
Detach with love. It is your husband But he has a disease.
If I truly let go....it dose not mater what happens to him?
Step one, oh so simple but yet so hard to do. Your there but he is not yet. The disease will destroy your world, unless you take control of your own life first.
I know many recovering addicts, and it is possible if he chooses it for himself and not the family or you.
Sending you strength, because change is taking place.
If I truly let go....it dose not mater what happens to him?
Step one, oh so simple but yet so hard to do. Your there but he is not yet. The disease will destroy your world, unless you take control of your own life first.
I know many recovering addicts, and it is possible if he chooses it for himself and not the family or you.
Sending you strength, because change is taking place.
Curmudgeon, Electrical Engineer, Guitar God Wannabe
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Where the mighty arms of Atlas hold the heavens from the Earth
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by SadHeart
The cold hard facts appear to be that only about 15% get better and go one to have productive lives (and that is a very generous number).
The thing is you never know which will be in the 15% and which will be in the 85%. And they all, even the 15% make you miserable if you let them.
The other cold hard fact is: they can stop, all they have to do is decide to.
The most important cold hard fact is: you can't in any way influence that decision: not by 'helping', not by researching the problem, not by arranging treatment, not by being 'supportive', not by throwing them out, not by calling the police, not by forgiving them, not by giving them a second chance, not by ANYTHING.
The last cold hard fact is that nothing we do can make them happy or healthy...and NOTHING they can do can make us unhappy or unhealthy. They are doing it to themselves, and so are we.
The thing is you never know which will be in the 15% and which will be in the 85%. And they all, even the 15% make you miserable if you let them.
The other cold hard fact is: they can stop, all they have to do is decide to.
The most important cold hard fact is: you can't in any way influence that decision: not by 'helping', not by researching the problem, not by arranging treatment, not by being 'supportive', not by throwing them out, not by calling the police, not by forgiving them, not by giving them a second chance, not by ANYTHING.
The last cold hard fact is that nothing we do can make them happy or healthy...and NOTHING they can do can make us unhappy or unhealthy. They are doing it to themselves, and so are we.
Even more heartbreaking is the number of overdoses amongst young people.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 864
A reality of this disease is that we have no control and will not have the answers we want or think we need before the fact.
We have to walk our path, take that chance on us to find those answers we need.
This is heroin addiction, take what you need…
8 partners spread out all over the world, each others source of strength through email, through phones calls, through chat rooms, almost 8 years have past and this is where time has taken the heroin addicts in their lives. It is 7 men, 1 woman.
Two are clean, 1 used sub and got off years ago, one is on methadone again and will probably be on for life, which makes sense. One is clean by default, jail, but he just got released so that can change, 1 is still struggling to stay clean, just went on a run and then put herself back into rehab and has been there for about a month, 1 is the wind, his gf left him and moved on so there is no update to know. Three didn’t make it, one blatantly killed himself and left his gf to find him, one took himself out on his terms, his way, and the other’s death was ruled heroin addiction/accidental od.
Now while this isn’t scientific, is does paint a picture of heroin addiction.
Love me not, one thing he isn’t is weak and it has nothing to do with being weak it is heroin addiction, simply heroin addiction.
To answer your question there is lots of talk that 20 year olds don’t have bottoms…I don’t buy that. The younger the better is only good when the family doesn’t enable to long. If they do basically what they are doing is giving their children time to adjust to the world of addiction, learn how to survive on the streets in little doses, learn how to get around uncomfortable situations, learn how to be sneakier, more manipulative, what works, what won’t to get those around them to give in…yet in time everyone ends up at the same place, further down, further compromised, deeper in…
I don’t know anyone who got clean and stayed clean that wasn’t allowed to just run their addiction out, that didn’t owe it in the end, as they now own their recovery.
We have to walk our path, take that chance on us to find those answers we need.
This is heroin addiction, take what you need…
8 partners spread out all over the world, each others source of strength through email, through phones calls, through chat rooms, almost 8 years have past and this is where time has taken the heroin addicts in their lives. It is 7 men, 1 woman.
Two are clean, 1 used sub and got off years ago, one is on methadone again and will probably be on for life, which makes sense. One is clean by default, jail, but he just got released so that can change, 1 is still struggling to stay clean, just went on a run and then put herself back into rehab and has been there for about a month, 1 is the wind, his gf left him and moved on so there is no update to know. Three didn’t make it, one blatantly killed himself and left his gf to find him, one took himself out on his terms, his way, and the other’s death was ruled heroin addiction/accidental od.
Now while this isn’t scientific, is does paint a picture of heroin addiction.
Love me not, one thing he isn’t is weak and it has nothing to do with being weak it is heroin addiction, simply heroin addiction.
To answer your question there is lots of talk that 20 year olds don’t have bottoms…I don’t buy that. The younger the better is only good when the family doesn’t enable to long. If they do basically what they are doing is giving their children time to adjust to the world of addiction, learn how to survive on the streets in little doses, learn how to get around uncomfortable situations, learn how to be sneakier, more manipulative, what works, what won’t to get those around them to give in…yet in time everyone ends up at the same place, further down, further compromised, deeper in…
I don’t know anyone who got clean and stayed clean that wasn’t allowed to just run their addiction out, that didn’t owe it in the end, as they now own their recovery.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
