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First post new to sober think, 7 days in

Old 04-24-2012, 12:09 AM
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First post new to sober think, 7 days in

Hey guys, this is my first post here, I wanna say i really enjoy reading the success stories many you have had. I just recently stopped drinking 7 days ago for a number of reasons, however the main was I was just tired of pissing my life and money away on booze. In the past 9 years, I have managed to become a functional alcoholic by pretty much hiding it from the world. I would rarely get drunk in public and usually be the responsible one. However, when I would get alone I would inhale 12-16 beers a night while playing video games or watching TV. I am now 30 and close to 50 lbs overweight. I am not a social drinker at all, I am actually more social while sober. I drink like crazy when I am alone and love it . I have few questions for you guys.

No one in my family knows I am alcoholic because I am ashamed of it. Who should I tell? I dunno, I just get depressed knowing that my family may look down upon me. I am the oldest sibling in the family and always looked up to. I hate the idea of them knowing I am an alcoholic.

I am successful sales executive at a fortune 500 company. My job is extremely stressful, hence one the reasons why I drink in private so much. My industry is littered with alcoholics. Whether it's a meeting with my co-workers, clients, potential clients, or company functions I am surrounded by booze. I swear everyone is a freaking alcoholic or user of some sort. Corporate America is such a drag. Anyone in this in this line of work have any suggestions?

My last 7 days have been tough, however not as hard as some of the many on here. I really only drank beer in excess. The 2-5 days were the hardest as far my withdraws. My antexity and stress levels were through the roof and I didn't sleep more than 4 hours a night. I've been loading myself with caffeine to get myself through the day at work. At what point did some of you start noticing a difference in your physical appearance after you stopped drinking? Also, when does the anxiety subside?

Anyways, tomorrow is a huge day for me, my companies softball team starts. If anyone knows softball, there will be more drunks than sober people I appreciate any comments or support you guys could give me. I am extremely glad I found this site. I will try to update tomorrow
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Old 04-24-2012, 12:25 AM
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Hi Homesig--
First congrats on 7 days sober and taking a good look at your choices. I can relate to being in corporate world, and your path. Master levels degree, six figure income, successful from a career perspective on many levels. But that's not been enough.

I've been a "functional alcoholic" since 2000 ...all throughout my 30s and now into my 40s. Although I've been lucky (?) for it not to escalate and progress in terms of amount of drinks. I actually cut back from 5-6 (2 litres/ of 7% cider/night) often to now 4-5/night at 5%. So its been a reduction and made a difference.

Only my mom and dad know and my ex. Nobody else. It has been shameful to share and may one day let the world know who I am and my story. But figure it'd be career suicide to share my story given my field (not sales) but lets say its in the counselling field so not a great 'habit'/story to have!

But at the level of drinking 2 liters/night, I was gaining weight (over 200 lbs and I'm 5ft 5), had high blood pressure and became borderline diabetic. My health was a big motivator to change. So I did downgear the overall amount but didn't stop.

Now the motivation is broader than that. It is about having a better life. Having more energy and besides, who'd want to be with a 'drunk' according to some people (my ex). The daily partaking was too much, and perhaps its an age thing. I never had hangovers or black outs, but its just tiring to continue like this. If anything at 44 I need to be finding ways to gain energy!

Health and happiness is #1. Perhaps its time to reassess what happiness is for you and your current line of career isn't working for you anymore. Maybe it did at one point? Take a sabbatical, do a retreat and get some new insights and see what happens. A very exciting time for you actually!
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Old 04-24-2012, 01:04 AM
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The withdrawals symptoms lasted a week for me, then it was a lot easier. The first three to six months I was quite unstable emotionally, and had obsessional thinking (see the Big Book)- but I was functioning better, felt better. Now at 11 months people who haven't seen me for a while are surprised at how healthy I look and the weight loss (about 7kg) (OMG what did they think before).

There are no easy answers for how to live your life and who to tell. It is worth the effort to try to build and maintain a sober life.

I now regard where I am as early in my recovery- my life is growing not dying
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Old 04-24-2012, 03:22 AM
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Being surrounded with alcohol sure doesn't make things any easier...I'd probably join AA rather than the drunken softball team...As far as the anxiety goes...It's pretty normal early on...Toning down on the caffiene wouldn't hurt. Get yourself a recovery program and work it. And you don't have to tell anybody...Just walking around sober and not hungover will speak for itself.
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Old 04-24-2012, 04:02 AM
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Welcome, Homesig!
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