Weasel1966

I cannot understand how yesterday I seemed so strong. I felt so good so clear headed. Yet today I am back at the beginning. How? Why? Is there any alcoholic that can trust themselves?? How will others believe in me if I don't?

I grew up in an alcoholic house ya would think I would know. My step father drank. He would hit and then forget. I used to think to myself how can he not remember. Then I found vodka. I learned that you can forget. At least for the moment.

I go to see my therapist tonight. Been two weeks. I am looking forward. I never want to feel this way again. I have to believe myself that's true.

sugarbear1

Keep trying. I know, this sounds weak, but it is how it worked for me. I had to keep trying to stay stopped. I used AA. Others use AVRT, but whatever you choose, do it well and work it like your life is on the line. Mine was.

You can do this!

Spinach

Good on the 5 days.
Start again and again until it works.
You've got yourself here and this is a fantastic place to be.
Seek help where you can in a form you can use.
John.

Weasel1966

Thanks for the support. I plan on trying again. Otherwise I would not be here posting.

Just hate feeling soooooooo low. Being sober the high are real high and today....

What is AVRT?

sugarbear1

Addictive Voice Recognition Therapy I think. Do a search, we can't put up a link.

NatalieN

Keep tring until it clicks. It will click if you give it your best shot. One thing that works for me is to ask for help to stay sober in the morning and say thank you at night. I don't address these 'prayers' to anyone in particular, I am not religious, but there is s force/energy/intelligence bigger than me and I am holding on to that mystery for dear life this time around. I drank again after 6 1/2 years and struggled to get sober again. Now that I am, I am doing whatever works. I love being sober. I love the 'feeling' of being carried by life. Call it whatever, but it works for me. If you are really at the end of your rope and trully want to quit, why don't you try this 'trick' and then report back to us. It works for so many. Best of luck weasel1966.

Natalie

desertsong

Growing up in an alcoholic household is not a guarantee that you won't become one yourself (obviously!). Both of my parents are alcoholics (my dad died from alcohol related dementia, among other things) and you'd think I'd have steered WAY clear of the stuff but I went down the same path anyway.

Lots of us have had "false starts." That doesn't mean that you're doomed to failure, as long as you continue to try. With the right support, you can get get sober for the last time. It helps to have a program to work, such as AA, AVRT, etc. because that will also give you "tools" you can use when you feel the desire to drink. I really recommend that. I know for myself that I could not have gotten sober without the help of AA.

I wish you all the best. You definitely have support here.

foodie1

Yes keep trying Weasel, our disease is powerful, but you'll find your way to live beyond it.

Purplecatlover

AVRT is under the secular connections threads in this forum. There is a book called Rational Recovery by Jack Trimpey that teaches Adiictive Voice Recognition Technique.
It is a great book if you are iffy about AA. It doesn't hurt to seek all methods of sobriety & find one that best suits you.
It has helped me further my own decision to quit drinking. To stay stopped. Permanently.
You can get off the merry go round of insanity.
I did. And I'm never going back. I'm finally free.
Best wishes.

2granddaughters

What did you try last time?

All the best.

Bob R

Dee74

many of us had false starts weasel - it's takes a lot of effort and commitment to change our lives.

Think about what kind of support you had, what kind of plan you had last time - and think about what more you might need to be successful this time

D