Is it unhealthy for suicide to be a comforting thought?
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Lafayette, Louisiana
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Is it unhealthy for suicide to be a comforting thought?
It is often reported that people are unusually happy in the days or hours preceding their suicide. It is suspected that this is because the person has made the decision and has the weight in their life lifted from their shoulders. I think that theory has some truth to it. Very often I will find myself thinking about suicide in order to comfort myself. In fact, sometimes I fantasize about suicide in order to fall asleep. I don't mean this in a depressing way. It's an exhilarating, and freeing feeling to think about it. However, in my sober moments I'm afraid I see the dangers of this and how it could turn fatal. Can any of you relate to these experiences and/or addictions? If so, what is your story, and what is your input on the subject? Thanks.
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Nothing is ever worth taking your life for. Please do not let those thoughts linger...do what it takes to realize you deserve a full life of recovery. If you need someone to talk you thru those feelings....please...please...consider calling the U.S National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. call 1-800-273-8255.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: "I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost ..."
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It is often reported that people are unusually happy in the days or hours preceding their suicide.
Lingering on suicide ideations is very dangerous and can indeed turn fatal very quickly.
I agree with RWF. Contact a professional. Now.
dude in recovery
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Gulf Coast, TX
Posts: 1,504
The thought of suicide would kick my heart rate (and bp) way up, I didn't feel very calm or comforted as I generally have a loaded .38 pistol sitting nearby.
Thank God those thoughts have gone away, along with the drink & drugs.
Hope you can talk things over with someone and get back to living well.
Thank God those thoughts have gone away, along with the drink & drugs.
Hope you can talk things over with someone and get back to living well.
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 5,678
Is it unhealthy for suicide to be a comforting thought?
I think the simple answer to this is yes.
But I can relate. I don't think I ever fully intended to commit suicide but I have found those thoughts comforting. It was a fantasy for me. But somewhere I'd rather not go anymore...it's not a good place to be. I think a lot of my depression was caused by alcohol but it's early days so I'm working hard to avoid those dark places.
Please talk to someone if you can x
I think the simple answer to this is yes.
But I can relate. I don't think I ever fully intended to commit suicide but I have found those thoughts comforting. It was a fantasy for me. But somewhere I'd rather not go anymore...it's not a good place to be. I think a lot of my depression was caused by alcohol but it's early days so I'm working hard to avoid those dark places.
Please talk to someone if you can x
Grateful to be free
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Arizona
Posts: 3,680
It's not healthy, but it's not uncommon either.
Suicidal ideology is many people's "mental" drug of choice, but like using anything to numb ourselves to reality, it can become an out of hand addiction, and end up killing us.
I discovered that suicide is one of the things I am addicted to, the sweet soft thrill I can get fantasizing over it.
This link might help you http://suicideanonymous.net/uploads/...ET_ok_copy.pdf
It's a real issue, you are not alone, there is a 12 step for it.
Suicidal ideology is many people's "mental" drug of choice, but like using anything to numb ourselves to reality, it can become an out of hand addiction, and end up killing us.
I discovered that suicide is one of the things I am addicted to, the sweet soft thrill I can get fantasizing over it.
This link might help you http://suicideanonymous.net/uploads/...ET_ok_copy.pdf
It's a real issue, you are not alone, there is a 12 step for it.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Princeton, ID
Posts: 101
I'm not sure what else I can say that hasn't already been said.
I frequently have suicidal ideation too, and I often find it comforting because it provides me with a sense of peace that I can escape the pain that I am in. At those times, I try to remind myself that, while suicide ends all pain, it also ends all possibility of joy and that I simply do not know what the next moment might bring until I have lived through it. I try no to promise myself good things, but remaining curious about the future helps.
I frequently have suicidal ideation too, and I often find it comforting because it provides me with a sense of peace that I can escape the pain that I am in. At those times, I try to remind myself that, while suicide ends all pain, it also ends all possibility of joy and that I simply do not know what the next moment might bring until I have lived through it. I try no to promise myself good things, but remaining curious about the future helps.
Your Distant Friend
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: pittsburgh, pa
Posts: 255
It is often reported that people are unusually happy in the days or hours preceding their suicide. It is suspected that this is because the person has made the decision and has the weight in their life lifted from their shoulders. I think that theory has some truth to it.
Very often I will find myself thinking about suicide in order to comfort myself.
that you must have made a conscious decision to take your life
each and every time you comfort yourself with the idea.
Ever hear of the story of the boy who cried wolf?
.. in other words ..
DONT do it.
AND you are running a serious risk of doing it just to prove to yourself or someone else that you are not a coward, which is probably the worst reason ever in the book, and, sadly, you wouldn't be the first person who went out like that...
Life is where its at!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Sarasota FL
Posts: 281
Yes.
In my experience the thoughts/ideation came as a way to momentarily provide mental relief from the pain and depression I was feelijng in my life.
Please get some preofessional help. Laying in bed and thinking about suicide while falling asleep/ suicidal thoughts providing comfort is NOT NORMAL. I wish you the best.
In my experience the thoughts/ideation came as a way to momentarily provide mental relief from the pain and depression I was feelijng in my life.
Please get some preofessional help. Laying in bed and thinking about suicide while falling asleep/ suicidal thoughts providing comfort is NOT NORMAL. I wish you the best.
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: London, UK
Posts: 68
Ditto to most of what's been written. I have frequent suicidal ideation, it feels like a comfort blanket, it's dangerous.
When I get it I want to sit alone with it, sort of getting "high" on it. Instead I share it as soon as possible with mental health professionals and safe people in recovery. I've also used The Samaritans when I haven't been able to reach anyone else, in the middle of the night sometimes, to get a reality check ASAP.
When I get it I want to sit alone with it, sort of getting "high" on it. Instead I share it as soon as possible with mental health professionals and safe people in recovery. I've also used The Samaritans when I haven't been able to reach anyone else, in the middle of the night sometimes, to get a reality check ASAP.
Want to form an alliance? :.)
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 220
It's not the suicidal thoughts that comfort you, "Babydoll", but rather, the Escapism. This in and of itself is perfectly normal and sometimes quite healthy.
But that aside for a second, it could be argued that 2 often hard-to-notice abstractions have unfolded in this thread:
A.) Mislabeling your emotional misunderstanding of what your psychological representations have conveyed.
B.) Contingent upon the above, you've become a victim of miscommunication--something we all do from time-to-time (communicating can be very difficult and almost always taken for granted).
You should consider whether you're effectively establishing solid distinctions between what you're interpreting as suicide and that of what it symbolized to you in the end.
What's I think is happening here is that you're skipping a step in this entire introspective process by fantasizing about doing something stupid without leveling the playing field of actual, real-life outcome. So instead of being real about it--envisioning the blood, the trauma, the visceral shock and horror of doing something rash and selfish like putting a bullet through your head and brain or slitting your wrists until your exposed skin and tenuous veins gush blood all over yourself and your carpet, in turn, leaving your loved ones behind in a dismal, grief-stricken wake of despair and unexplained horror--you're instead glazing over that *tiny bit of detail* and substituting it with what your fantasy seems to have ideally engineered for you in order to help you cope with a pain you've yet to completely identify and comprehend about yourself, your reality; whatever. All this (in your mind) basically equates to, "kill ourselves but skip over the realness of it all and go straight to the wonderful reprieve of happy ending, perpetual freedom, and surreal circumvention of life's misery."
Make sense?
And as for the other thing, well, your current vocabulary and definitions thereof mistakenly translated all this stuff into, "I get off on killing myself and it makes me feel better... Am I weird?"
...add insecurity to the mix.
With all this in mind, sure, like others have implied or stated directly, it can't hurt to speak to someone about some of this. I mean, it doesn't traditionally hurt to... Just make sure you get with someone you like to speak to whom you believe understands you and makes you feel better about things (after 3 or 4 sessions, that is--this would be a decent approximation of clinical compatibility).
What you could do in the meantime is ask yourself, "What exactly is it I'm trying to escape from?" If you think hard about it, I bet you'll come up with some things you wouldn't normally acknowledge. Scan your emotions. Test to see what things you've overlooked or become somewhat numb or oblivious to... Nothing is off the table here. Take an emotionally reactive inventory.
(And I hope none of this stuff I wrote offended you... I have the tendency of speaking somewhat "folksy" at times when I really probably shouldn't, especially when using digital mediums to communicate with. In any event, I hope it helps provide you with some alternative perspectives and food for thought--I kind of think I know what you're experiencing because I've gone through similar stuff like this myself.)
Best wishes.
But that aside for a second, it could be argued that 2 often hard-to-notice abstractions have unfolded in this thread:
A.) Mislabeling your emotional misunderstanding of what your psychological representations have conveyed.
B.) Contingent upon the above, you've become a victim of miscommunication--something we all do from time-to-time (communicating can be very difficult and almost always taken for granted).
You should consider whether you're effectively establishing solid distinctions between what you're interpreting as suicide and that of what it symbolized to you in the end.
What's I think is happening here is that you're skipping a step in this entire introspective process by fantasizing about doing something stupid without leveling the playing field of actual, real-life outcome. So instead of being real about it--envisioning the blood, the trauma, the visceral shock and horror of doing something rash and selfish like putting a bullet through your head and brain or slitting your wrists until your exposed skin and tenuous veins gush blood all over yourself and your carpet, in turn, leaving your loved ones behind in a dismal, grief-stricken wake of despair and unexplained horror--you're instead glazing over that *tiny bit of detail* and substituting it with what your fantasy seems to have ideally engineered for you in order to help you cope with a pain you've yet to completely identify and comprehend about yourself, your reality; whatever. All this (in your mind) basically equates to, "kill ourselves but skip over the realness of it all and go straight to the wonderful reprieve of happy ending, perpetual freedom, and surreal circumvention of life's misery."
Make sense?
And as for the other thing, well, your current vocabulary and definitions thereof mistakenly translated all this stuff into, "I get off on killing myself and it makes me feel better... Am I weird?"
...add insecurity to the mix.
With all this in mind, sure, like others have implied or stated directly, it can't hurt to speak to someone about some of this. I mean, it doesn't traditionally hurt to... Just make sure you get with someone you like to speak to whom you believe understands you and makes you feel better about things (after 3 or 4 sessions, that is--this would be a decent approximation of clinical compatibility).
What you could do in the meantime is ask yourself, "What exactly is it I'm trying to escape from?" If you think hard about it, I bet you'll come up with some things you wouldn't normally acknowledge. Scan your emotions. Test to see what things you've overlooked or become somewhat numb or oblivious to... Nothing is off the table here. Take an emotionally reactive inventory.
(And I hope none of this stuff I wrote offended you... I have the tendency of speaking somewhat "folksy" at times when I really probably shouldn't, especially when using digital mediums to communicate with. In any event, I hope it helps provide you with some alternative perspectives and food for thought--I kind of think I know what you're experiencing because I've gone through similar stuff like this myself.)
Best wishes.
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 590
If you read this, read it all.
Originally Posted by DrStrangelove 
It is often reported that people are unusually happy in the days or hours preceding their suicide. It is suspected that this is because the person has made the decision and has the weight in their life lifted from their shoulders. I think that theory has some truth to it. Very often I will find myself thinking about suicide in order to comfort myself. In fact, sometimes I fantasize about suicide in order to fall asleep. I don't mean this in a depressing way. It's an exhilarating, and freeing feeling to think about it. However, in my sober moments I'm afraid I see the dangers of this and how it could turn fatal. Can any of you relate to these experiences and/or addictions? If so, what is your story, and what is your input on the subject? Thanks.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 178
Hi DrStrangeLove,
The title of your thread made me laugh (0:
I think you know it's probably unhealthy for suicide to be a comforting thought! I think we all know that! But it has been a comforting thought for me too at times - the fantasy of being able to just leave it all behind, all the too-hard things, all the sorrow/guilt/anger/shame in just the same way as the thought of going to a new country and starting anew is also a comforting thought, but maybe a healthier one than suicide!
I don't think I ever seriously contemplated actually doing it, but it did comfort me when I became overwhelmed or could see no way out of a bad situation.
I think the Buddhists completely put me off that one as they teach that the state of mind you are in when you die is what will lead you to the place you're going to - so if you're miserable that doesn't bode well.
And also it makes you realise we have the opportunity in this life to face up to and overcome those overwhelming situations - where there's life there's hope! And that's always true.
There's always hope for enlightenment, for a change of heart, for unexpected events that change your world for the better.
If you see the problems as a challenge they're easier to deal with than just seeing obstacle after obstacle, and you get to feel good about yourself when you come to grips with something you never thought you could or would.
It's harder for us in the west because we're raised to think we should be happy and have it all or else we're a loser, but methinks that is a load of ****!
The title of your thread made me laugh (0:
I think you know it's probably unhealthy for suicide to be a comforting thought! I think we all know that! But it has been a comforting thought for me too at times - the fantasy of being able to just leave it all behind, all the too-hard things, all the sorrow/guilt/anger/shame in just the same way as the thought of going to a new country and starting anew is also a comforting thought, but maybe a healthier one than suicide!
I don't think I ever seriously contemplated actually doing it, but it did comfort me when I became overwhelmed or could see no way out of a bad situation.
I think the Buddhists completely put me off that one as they teach that the state of mind you are in when you die is what will lead you to the place you're going to - so if you're miserable that doesn't bode well.
And also it makes you realise we have the opportunity in this life to face up to and overcome those overwhelming situations - where there's life there's hope! And that's always true.
There's always hope for enlightenment, for a change of heart, for unexpected events that change your world for the better.
If you see the problems as a challenge they're easier to deal with than just seeing obstacle after obstacle, and you get to feel good about yourself when you come to grips with something you never thought you could or would.
It's harder for us in the west because we're raised to think we should be happy and have it all or else we're a loser, but methinks that is a load of ****!
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Join Date: Jun 2020
Posts: 1
Me Too
I too struggle with suicidal fantasies to get relief from a painful life. I’m going to start to say no in my mind when those thoughts come in. Reading the forum was good for me. It helped to know I’m not the only one with this issue.
I am a person of faith so I know these thoughts are very dangerous even if I think they aren’t.
I’m a believer in prayer so I’m going to start praying for God to help (He’s helped me break unhealthy thoughts before--why not this area?—I can’t do it on my own) me break this 40 year old stress reliever habit.
Thank you fellow forum contributors.
I am a person of faith so I know these thoughts are very dangerous even if I think they aren’t.
I’m a believer in prayer so I’m going to start praying for God to help (He’s helped me break unhealthy thoughts before--why not this area?—I can’t do it on my own) me break this 40 year old stress reliever habit.
Thank you fellow forum contributors.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,772
Welcome to the family Dogs! 
I used to find comfort in planning my suicide but that never happens anymore. I hope you can find some comfort and support here. You're among friends here. 
I used to find comfort in planning my suicide but that never happens anymore. I hope you can find some comfort and support here. You're among friends here.
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