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I've been to the pub today and had 6 pints....:-(

Old 04-11-2012, 11:38 AM
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I've been to the pub today and had 6 pints....:-(

Hi guys,

Can you believe it? I'm devastated. I came back from a long weekend at our caravan today and a couple of my friends had the day off and temptation got the better of me.

I'm totally gutted at the moment, I am sitting at home though drinking a cup of tea and watching TV with the kids where as before I would be on the wine and heading towards oblivion.

I know ill feel a lot worse in the morning when I wake up for work and have to face the fact that I'm back on day one.

How do people usually bounce back from this and is it a regular ongoing thing for people on the forum?

Thanks in advance guys,

Bruno. :-/
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Old 04-11-2012, 11:43 AM
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Don't give up on yourself. Get back up and start again. Do something different to stay sober this time. Develop a plan for sobriety. Give it your all.

I fell off the wagon more times than I can remember, but with the support of the good people here I never gave up and now have almost two and a half years sober!

Keep trying until you 'get it' or die. Never give up!
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Old 04-11-2012, 11:51 AM
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That's a fantastic result mate,

Well done,

I'm feeling more determind than ever after this set back.

The feeling of guilt isn't worth the heartache for a few beers.

Thanks again,

Bruno.
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Old 04-11-2012, 11:53 AM
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Bruno: You're going to have to put sobriety at the top of your priority list.

All the best to you.

Bob R
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Old 04-11-2012, 12:02 PM
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Originally Posted by Bruno1979 View Post
...is it a regular ongoing thing for people on the forum?
Sadly, relapse seems to be a regular occurance for many.

That said, don't think that relapse is just part of recovery. It's not. Relapse is part of active addiction.

Good luck.
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Old 04-11-2012, 12:10 PM
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Usually people bounce back just fine and try the same thing again really hard because they're sure they just didn't try hard enough those other times.

But occasionally a few begin to actually do something about their drinking problem instead of kidding themselves that this time will be different from all those other times, and often their results change for the better.

What's your plan?
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Old 04-11-2012, 12:20 PM
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Originally Posted by langkah View Post
Usually people bounce back just fine and try the same thing again really hard because they're sure they just didn't try hard enough those other times.

But occasionally a few begin to actually do something about their drinking problem instead of kidding themselves that this time will be different from all those other times, and often their results change for the better.

What's your plan?
Hi,

Thanks for the reply,

My plan is to not drink again. Just sitting here on the sofa with my kids breathing the booze smell over them makes me feel sick.

I have caused no harm with this relapse apart from to myself mentally. I haven't yet discussed my concerns with my wife and to everybody in this household daddy/husband has just been for a few beers on returning from holiday and nobody is any of the wiser.

Bruno
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Old 04-11-2012, 12:26 PM
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Good you're still trying, keep it going.
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Old 04-11-2012, 12:27 PM
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Ah Bruno.

Try to learn from it. If temptation waits for you in the pub, stay out of the pub. If temptation lives among your friends, make new friends. Alcoholism is a serious, deadly disease and you're the only one that can treat it.

And you're 100% right. The feeling that you've failed yourself is most definitely NOT worth a couple beers.
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Old 04-11-2012, 12:33 PM
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Oh Bruno, I'm sorry man. First of all, well done going onto tea instead of getting completely blitzed. That's progress. And you're not relapsing cos you're already calling tomorrow day one...

I failed to get a handle on this for 19 years. The thing that's made the difference this time is that I believe myself when I say I don't want to drink again. I mean, I want to get drunk. But I really truly don't want to be a drinker. Not any more.

After that decision, I had to practise saying no. Hell no. Cardifflad's practised saying it with threats - 'offer me that drink again and you'll be wearing it' I think were his exact words...


xxx

Last edited by stillsleeping; 04-11-2012 at 12:34 PM. Reason: question already answered
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Old 04-11-2012, 12:40 PM
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Originally Posted by stillsleeping View Post
Oh Bruno, I'm sorry man. First of all, well done going onto tea instead of getting completely blitzed. That's progress. And you're not relapsing cos you're already calling tomorrow day one...

I failed to get a handle on this for 19 years. The thing that's made the difference this time is that I believe myself when I say I don't want to drink again. I mean, I want to get drunk. But I really truly don't want to be a drinker. Not any more.

After that decision, I had to practise saying no. Hell no. Cardifflad's practised saying it with threats - 'offer me that drink again and you'll be wearing it' I think were his exact words...

xxx
Thanks for that still sleeping :-)

Haha about cardiff lad. That's one way of dealing with the situation :-)
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Old 04-11-2012, 12:41 PM
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Originally Posted by SOBERINNEPA View Post
Ah Bruno.

Try to learn from it. If temptation waits for you in the pub, stay out of the pub. If temptation lives among your friends, make new friends. Alcoholism is a serious, deadly disease and you're the only one that can treat it.

And you're 100% right. The feeling that you've failed yourself is most definitely NOT worth a couple beers.
Thank you very much for you advice :-)
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Old 04-11-2012, 12:41 PM
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Hi Bruno -

Some people relapse and some don't, but they've usually gone through a lot of failed attempts to control their drinking by the time they find sobriety.

You'll feel better about yourself when you have a couple days sober again, especially if you use this to look at what led up to your relapse. I found it too tempting at first to be in social situations where drinking was taking place. Daily motivation helped, too.

Give yourself some credit for posting and nipping this in the bud!
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Old 04-11-2012, 01:17 PM
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Hi Bruno...I've had to avoid the local pub since I stopped drinking. I am the type who goes in for a quick meal and ends up closing the place down and stumbling out 5 hours later. I had a 3 day relapse last November that started with a pint with friends after work and culminated with a bottle of vodka and a hotel room. Just gotta get back on track I guess and never stop trying!
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Old 04-11-2012, 01:34 PM
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Hi Bruno

I'm glad you're back

It took me years to get it - but I finally realised if I want changes in my life, I had to make changes.

I could be the man I wanted to be - or I could drink - but I couldn't be both.

D
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Old 04-11-2012, 01:34 PM
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Sorry to hear this Bruno but well done for coming here and being honest. If no one at home knows how this is affecting you it's great that you can come here and have a record of this so it doesn't end up being a slide back into drinking. Did you intend to drink before you went to the pub? What led you to having a drink?

Btw, love this:

Originally Posted by doggonecarl View Post
That said, don't think that relapse is just part of recovery. It's not. Relapse is part of active addiction.
I just read an article that said relapse is a part of recovery and it depressed the hell out of me. I'm terrified of drinking now and am really hoping I stay that way!

Keep drinking the tea Bruno x
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Old 04-11-2012, 03:41 PM
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How do people usually bounce back from this and is it a regular ongoing thing for people on the forum?
Some people don't bounce back. Some people just keep it up forever—a stretch of sobriety here, a return to drinking there. Others just give up and drink their lives away. But others learn from the past, adjust their thoughts and actions accordingly, and break free of the cycle once and for all.

That's going to be you. No reason it can't be. My advice would be to take it as proof that you are in the grip of addiction, and that the only way to end it is to end it completely, without so much as another drop.

Just sitting here on the sofa with my kids breathing the booze smell over them makes me feel sick.
I think that's a very good sign. No romantic, idealistic notions of alcohol at all—just the cold, hard reality of drinking. You can totally do this.

PS: I now go to bars with my friends quite often. It doesn't bother me because drinking is simply not an option for me under any circumstances. But that's me, and where I'm at now, and it wasn't always so clear to me. Give yourself time and a wide safety net.
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Old 04-12-2012, 02:19 AM
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I caught the tram home. I could smell the guy next to me at 4.45pm. I used to be that guy. It is too hard to put the genie back in the bottle. I have accepted that I am different and I am willing to take whatever comes with that. At times I will feel left out, so be it.
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Old 04-12-2012, 02:32 AM
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just keep on trucking..
nothing is permanent.
so.
even your suffering.

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Old 04-12-2012, 02:34 AM
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Hi Bruno. Good man for not stretching the relapse beyond the 6 pints. This could have been so easy to do. There are a lot of people slipping at the moment. We are living in tough times. I hope that we can stay strong and sober. I feel that the best thing you can do is to go to meetings and to stay totally away from occasions that involve going to boozers. I wish you a fair wind this time.
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