Kindeyes

I'm having my family here for Easter dinner today. All except my AS. Don't know where he is but I assume he is alive. My phone rang yesterday and I didn't recognize the number so I didn't answer it. No message was left. I suspect it was him.

I'm going to enjoy the wonderful, loving people who will be filling my home today. My AS will be there in my heart.

Happy Easter to all who celebrate this holiday.

gentle hopping bunny hugs to everyone today
ke

Ann

I miss my son on holidays too, Kindeyes, and say extra prayers for him when I do.

I too have learned to find joy in the day myself, it's better than sitting sadly alone wishing things were different. It's not as hard today as it was the first while. But I am saying a prayer for all our loved ones who will not be with us as Easter.

Hugs

Windmills

I'm enjoying the peace usually Easter weekend is a nightmare, my ex would be Hugh as a kite and either not turn up to dinner or be nodding out at the table. Today has been calm, my sister and niece came round and we cooked dinner together and now we're watching Mary Poppins. I did have to call a friend who works as a DV support worker to get a bit if reassurance though!
Happy Easter all xxx

zoso77

I just spent a few days out in Utah for business. And where I was was, simply, the most desolate part of the country I've seen thus far. Mountains anywhere you look, no trees, no houses, no people. Just rugged landscapes and varmints like rattlesnakes. And in its own way, it was stunningly beautiful. I think, before finding program, I would have had a hard time being out there given all that has happened with my AXGF. But what being out there made me realize was I'm very content and happy by myself. So, Easter alone isn't all that difficult for me because I've got my sanity.

What being a member on the board has given me is a greater sense of appreciation for all I do have. The most heartbreaking stories on here are the stories about mothers dealing with sick children, and those stories have made me realize that I'm pretty fortunate that my AXGF was only a girlfriend and not a wife or a daughter. We can get rid of girlfriends or boyfriends. But we're always bonded to our children. So, on this Easter, I hope everyone finds some level of peace and serenity, even if it's just for a moment or two. Your stories and your wisdom have made a huge difference for me.

ZoSo

itsanewday2011

Thanks for starting this thread. I went to church today feeling hope, but during the service felt an overwhelming broken heart. I couldn't stop the tears from streaming down my face.

I think it was because my brother and his wife and son were here this weekend, and I felt joy with them, but when they were gone, it reminded me of all of the heartbreak we have felt following my ex choosing drugs over our daughter and me. He is in recovery now, so our daughter will get to enjoy an egg hunt with her dad and his family this afternoon.

Last night my brother reminded me of the time my ex (we were engaged at the time) was smoking crack at his apartment. I can honestly say I don't remember that. Was I so naive or did I just seem to 'avoid' what he was really doing?

During dinner my brother and his wife toasted me and said what a great job I am doing as a single mom. My brother and I started to cry. My ex was one of my brother's best friends, and he is so angry with him. I am still just so sad. It certainly takes a long time to heal a broken heart.

I tried to focus on healing at today's service, and to focus on the fact that there is a great plan for my daughter and me, even though I am still somewhat blaming myself for allowing myself to stay with him and bringing a child into the addiction chaos.

Trying to focus on forgiving myself and appreciation for our beautiful 3 year old who gives me hope and strength - even when she won't take her nap!

hope213

i think we all miss our addict the most on holidays. today was also my birthday & it was a double wammie for son & my grandson not to be here. hope u all had a great easter. God is good.

krhea75

I miss my son too, today. But I am doing okay. My husband (his stepfather) and I moved this weekend to a new house. My son doesn't even know where it is. A feeling of disconnect. I just can' keep it up. I am too tired. I hope he finds health. I hope he finds love. I wish that someday we can be together on holidays.

Chino

Happy birthday, hope213

zoso77

Happy Birthday, and God Bless.

ZoSo

StillLearning1

Kindeyes and all-
Finding today, tough. I hope you all had a peace filled day.
Thank you for sharing your experience, strength and hope.

I post infrequently, but read lots, and have learned so much from all who share here.
Share what I have learned with my son's. (exh and their father is my "qualifier")
Not sure exactly why, many reasons no doubt.
But we had a nice holiday, one without, the feelings of sad, bad or mad.

I know you all have helped with that-
thank you-
SL

itsanewday2011

Happy Birthday, Hope.

newnormal4me

It was my kids weekend to be with their dad and his family. I decided to go to their church instead of mine cause I couldn't bear going to church alone without them. I'm so glad I did. But I cried endlessly during the service...they had Teen Challenge their today - I had no idea. Ugh! I survived and did have a blast with my kids.

Hugs to everyone!

wicked

Thank you everyone, I wish everyone a Happy Easter too.
My youngest two and I went out to brunch. It was nice and I had a good time.
I do miss my oldest son, who is out there somewhere.
This is the only place to bring him up.
Richard, I love you and hope you find peace.
Love
Mom

Kindeyes

Easter was lovely for me and my family. Dinner was fabulous (she says as she takes a bow) lol. The day was sunny and beautiful and reasonably warm--enough so that we sat outside for a while. I enjoyed the laughter and company of the family members who were present. It was a great day.

I hope that the day was beautiful for each of you because you are all in my prayers every single day.

gentle hugs
ke