Need Advise

Old 04-06-2012, 05:48 AM
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Need Advise

I have realized , i need counceling. I dont have any assistance program at work and dont have any money anymore. How does someone find help in my situation? I really feel like i need to to talk to someone, All im doing is working and really doing nothing else. Just sitting in this house, that i wont be living in much longer. No friends here, if youre not from here everyone everyone stays to them self. To far from my family ( but most of them on meth) and dont have gas money to go any where. I need help. I was never a weak person before, what have i become
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Old 04-06-2012, 06:39 AM
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Many communities have counseling services on a sliding scale. Just calling a few counseling offices and asking if they have or know of an office that provides services on a sliding scale will help. I'll bet that if they don't offer it, someone will be able to provide you with a phone number of an office that does.

I'm glad to hear that you recognize that you want/need help. For me, that was a huge step forward. I was always feeling that I could handle anything and I would try to do so to my own detriment. Now I recognize when I need help processing and I call my therapist. She knows me and helps me work through things. It helps.

gentle hugs
ke
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Old 04-06-2012, 07:41 AM
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I lived in Delta BC and I called the government social assistance office and was able to get free counselling, the way that worked is that they put me in for being in an abusive relationship, rather than a relationship with an addict (this wasn't a lie, it was abusive). I was able to get 6 hour and a half long counselling sessions and then group offered to me after that. It really helped, as I was able to get the strength and help and understanding to move out from the addict in a safe manner. Not sure if they have something similar but I also called like women's shelters, women's abuse lines and was able to talk to someone on the phone.
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Old 04-06-2012, 07:48 AM
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Also dont' be too hard on yourself, just know that you are changing and becoming more aware of the situation you are in. Sometimes change is hard, but in the end, I think it is better to grow, than to stay stuck in a harmful situation, for you, the addict and your family. I ask God for strength, when I don't think I have enough, to make the changes I need to make. ((Hang in there))
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Old 04-06-2012, 09:11 AM
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Getting help

Found a womens help center, Appointment on Monday. Ill let you guys no how it goes. Sorry been posting so much , taking up space. Just have no one to talk to.All i have right now is S.R.
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Old 04-06-2012, 09:22 AM
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Jolinda,

YOU are a very important member of SR.
You may not even realize this right now, but by sharing your experiences here YOU are helping everyone else.
I think you are very courageous; change can be very difficult - so don't be so hard on yourself.
I'm glad you have an appointment for some 1:1 counseling.
Will be keeping you and your family in my prayers

Kel
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Old 04-08-2012, 08:27 AM
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Originally Posted by jolinda View Post
Found a womens help center, Appointment on Monday. Ill let you guys no how it goes. Sorry been posting so much , taking up space. Just have no one to talk to.All i have right now is S.R.
Jolinda
It is quite refreshing to see someone on SR ask for help but more importantly take action to find help for herself. You are inspiring people even though you may not realize it. Keep taking care of you and let us know how things are going.

You are not alone and we do care.

gentle hugs
ke
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Old 04-08-2012, 08:40 AM
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Is there a library near you, jolinda?

If so, one thing you can do for yourself is go sit in the library and read the books there on addiction and codependency or on grief or anything about passages through life. It helps to get out of the house. The writers in the books can help you for now. Many libraries are open in the evening and of course on weekends. You can imagine an angel sitting next to you as you read. Helping you not return to someone who will hurt you.

As well, churches often have self-help groups, people just trying to grow more spiritual. If you aren't of a particular denomination, you could look into a more relaxed church like a Unity or Unitarian.

Of course, any 12 step group online could also help, if you can't make one in person. Al-Anon has meetings online.

We go through times of wilderness in our lives, as lost any any child in the woods. It is necessary. For something new to be born, something old has to die. The person we used to be, the kind of life we used to live.....and it hurts, this grief of letting go of the old when something new has not yet appeared for us. People are impatient. They don't want to have to pay a price for change. They don't want to have to feel lonely and lost. They're afraid it's permanent.

But all the great stories, the myths, the Easter story, all the great stories tell us that we have to be lost for awhile, we have to bear with our suffering, if we want to live authentic and meaningful lives.

In one of my lost times I remember being new in a city where I had no friends and had left a relationship with an A I thought I'd have forever. I got a lot of recovery books and I sat in Starbucks for hours and read. I would look around at the tables of people with their friends or their lovers and I would wish I had not lost what I had, and was not so lonely.

But going back to an addict was not an option. And I was forced to rely on myself to survive. I did this for a year before things changed for me. You can do this, too, jolinda. Don't give up on yourself. Just hang on. New life is on the way. But God wants you to sit with this right now. It is part of your destiny. You are strong enough and can bear it. Life is asking you to grow and you can.

I'm glad you posted. Even SR can sit with you. God bless you today as you find your way.
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Old 04-08-2012, 08:55 AM
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I do have a library, i go there alot to check out books, im a reader. My daughter has ordered me , codependent no more. Cant wait to get it. Im trying to stay busy, getting ready to mow grass and be in the sunshine
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Old 04-08-2012, 09:15 AM
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Jolinda,

I'm not sure if you've checked your private messages. I messaged you some info that might be of some help to you

I know how isolated and lonely being in love with someone who is dependent on a substance can be. I am hear for you if you need someone to talk to.

Feel free to message me anytime and I am more then willing to give you my number if you'd like to talk via the phone.

Keep walking in the direction of trying to understand addiction it is in the journey that you will find yourself and the strength to become free.

Co-dependent No More will be very helpful and bring much insight to you. I sent you a link to a site that is geared specifically towards methamphetamine addiction. It is a great site. Very informative. I think you will find it helpful.

*hugs*
Passion
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Old 04-08-2012, 10:00 AM
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We go through times of wilderness in our lives, as lost any any child in the woods. It is necessary. For something new to be born, something old has to die. The person we used to be, the kind of life we used to live.....and it hurts, this grief of letting go of the old when something new has not yet appeared for us. People are impatient. They don't want to have to pay a price for change. They don't want to have to feel lonely and lost. They're afraid it's permanent.

But all the great stories, the myths, the Easter story, all the great stories tell us that we have to be lost for awhile, we have to bear with our suffering, if we want to live authentic and meaningful lives.

In one of my lost times I remember being new in a city where I had no friends and had left a relationship with an A I thought I'd have forever. I got a lot of recovery books and I sat in Starbucks for hours and read. I would look around at the tables of people with their friends or their lovers and I would wish I had not lost what I had, and was not so lonely.

But going back to an addict was not an option. And I was forced to rely on myself to survive. I did this for a year before things changed for me. You can do this, too, jolinda. Don't give up on yourself. Just hang on. New life is on the way. But God wants you to sit with this right now. It is part of your destiny. You are strong enough and can bear it. Life is asking you to grow and you can.

I'm glad you posted. Even SR can sit with you. God bless you today as you find your way.
EnglishGarden
Man.....that was so beautiful! Thank you.....I needed those words today.
gentle hugs
ke
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Old 04-08-2012, 10:12 AM
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It takes far more strength in character to reach out and ask for help! To me, this shows healthy growth....good love, mags
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