jolinda

Well Joe(my addict husband) didnt come back, and it took all i had not to text him. He texted me, said hed be home around noon. I texted him and told him not to come home, we werent living in his nightmare any more. Told him i was turning him over to god, he is the only one that could help him. I couldnt. First it was feel sorry for me, then begging, then anger. He said he was coming. I said no, not without a fist fight. We have never done that! But i couldnt let him come home. He said thats crazy, i said yes it is, but u have made me this way.He didnt come, but texted me as soon as i got off work. Said what u doing , i said what u doing. He said looking for a place to stay, i said ok. Havent heard another word. I feel like im abandoning him. After being togeather for 25 years, I feel like i lost my right hand. Please give me the courage to not contact him, i really cant believe this is so hard. Feeling so bad. Im getting the book ( codependent no more) Thursday. Hope it helps. Really need some support. Thanks

zoso77

Hey, Jolinda...

What you did took strength. That wasn't easy. I know you're hurting and that you're fighting with yourself. You did the right thing not only for yourself, but for your AH. He needs to take control of his life and, if he wants it, his recovery. He can't do that with you enabling him.

I hope that you're also able to find a Nar Anon meeting local to you, as you really need the in-person support right now.

Will be thinking of you tonight during my prayers.

Be Safe,
ZoSo

jolinda

I have gone to 1 meeting last Friday, going again this Friday. Going to check at work about some counceling Thursday. This is so hard and lonley,Thanks for the advise Zoso

Heartbroken0608

I don't have much to offer but wanted you to know you're in my thoughts. I can imagine how hard this is but you absolutely did the right thing. You deserve a better life than what you are currently living with.

Stay strong and keep reaching out for support!

Ann

Hugs from me too, Jolinda, I know this is very hard for you.

Stick around, we're walking with you.

yez5

So sorry you are hurting Jolinda. I know how you feel. I am going through the same thing now. Fighting the urge to contact my AH everyday. Keeping it together in front of the kids and helping them through it too. Moment to moment. Day by day. That is how I am getting through. You are in my prayers.