AV nipping at my heals...but made it thru day 6
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Join Date: Mar 2012
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AV nipping at my heals...but made it thru day 6
Was floating thru my new found sobriety, then last night had MAJOR urge to "have a couple beers". All the anxiety that I have been reading about hit me! Actually at the store, going to "reward" myself for my week of non-drinking, had a fantastic job interview...4 different interviews over 6 hours and I found myself both thrilled about how clear headed and sharp I was during interviews (uhmm...not hung over helped) and immediately thought about celebrating. Stared at the beer...put my headphones on and listened repeatedly to Angel (my anthem of recovery) and separated my voice from my AV...kept telling myself that I don't need it....let it pass. Guess what? It did!! Never felt better waking up this morning alert and proud! If ur not a meeting type of person, please read RR book...it made the difference for me last night. Have a fantastic day!!!
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Join Date: Mar 2012
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no,no,no...no beer in the fridge. Was standing in the aisle at the store
If I had beer at home, I fear that i wouldn't have had the time I needed to process my decision. the entire drive to the store there was a dialogue in my head...it's friday, you really only want to go to moderation, not TERMINATION!
Finally, i bought some chocolate and soda and ran out of the store...in 5 minutes the thoughts passed...pretty cool
If I had beer at home, I fear that i wouldn't have had the time I needed to process my decision. the entire drive to the store there was a dialogue in my head...it's friday, you really only want to go to moderation, not TERMINATION!
Finally, i bought some chocolate and soda and ran out of the store...in 5 minutes the thoughts passed...pretty cool
I don't go to meetings, nor have I read the RR book, but I do know that recognizing your alcoholic voice for what it is, is a big step in recovery. You can hear it and dismiss it, and you will be stronger for doing so.
6palms, I am 70 days sober today. I'm a wino. I do not drink. The Beast is irritated because I no longer supply its needs. I am irritated because that damn monster projects into the future and dredges up former so called "fun times" before the alcohol controlled my days. I am powerless over alcohol and my life became unmanageable because of my idiotic choices. I absolutley do not think about drinking today but I confess to really staying away from any social situation that might stir the Beast from her slumber. Simple, yes. Easy, no. Satisfying? Beyond measure. Thank you for allowing me to write this and all the best to you on this journey. T
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Location: « USA » Recovered with AVRT (Rational Recovery) ___________
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You need to pay close attention to your use of pronouns. The AV's favorite pronoun is 'I', because if you think that 'you' want to drink, you are free to drink, and possibly will. You didn't have an urge, your Beast did. Stay in your right mind, as in "I never drink, and since addictive desire is not me, but the Beast, I don't even want to drink."
Commit the above paragraph to memory.
This is where the 'Big Plan' of AVRT comes in, 6palms. You make a decision, once, and you never have to process it again. With the Big Plan, you remove the option of ever considering choosing to drink, and there is no need for a cost-benefit analysis every time you see a beer. AVRT is not about 'choosing not to drink today', and without a Big Plan, there is no AVRT. I noticed you posted in the AVRT thread, 6palms. Have you read through it?
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You said Angel? Sarah McLaughlin ?
Just curious? That song helped me get sober 13 yrs ago.
Have alot more tools now. Glad you stood your ground.
Any thoughts that pop in my head, I just say "not an option, next". Shuts it up pretty quick. No arguing. No engagement. Just flat out NO!
Just curious? That song helped me get sober 13 yrs ago.
Have alot more tools now. Glad you stood your ground.
Any thoughts that pop in my head, I just say "not an option, next". Shuts it up pretty quick. No arguing. No engagement. Just flat out NO!
That's fantastic, 6palms. Sounds like you're getting it! I know that trap of "rewarding yourself" for getting some sober time all too well. That's your AV talking ... "We've been SO good, why not just have 'a couple' just to celebrate?" You cut it off at the knees and that's friggin' awesome.
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"professor" TU, yes I have read the entire AVRT thread and I'm sorry for the pronoun slippage. Perhaps I'm not a skilled avrt'r yet
I think I'll branch off and use whatever pieces of all the programs I need to refrain from drinking...I'll call it the WITTNFD (whatever it takes to not f..king drink) method. So far it's working...
Thanks to all who continue to encourage us newbies!
I think I'll branch off and use whatever pieces of all the programs I need to refrain from drinking...I'll call it the WITTNFD (whatever it takes to not f..king drink) method. So far it's working...
Thanks to all who continue to encourage us newbies!
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I didn't mean to put you on the spot, 6palms. Just be aware that usually, after digesting all of that information, there is a period where the AV will reorganize. It has not choice but to do this, and it can become quite subtle if it has to. That is the time to plug all the holes and tighten up all the screws.
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