anotherquitter

Hi - first post for me. My story is pretty comon according to what I've read here. I am a heavy drinker and know that I should quit. At 46 I find that I'm starting to get soft around the middle, not exercising, and in the past year or so the amount I'm drinking has increased. I've tried rationalizing my behavour, blaming depression/stress etc. and I'm also not sucessfull at moderation. No serious blackouts but I do drink to excess more times than not, and drink almost daily. I'm married to a great lady who is 30+ years sober (AA) and I want to keep her.

I want to set a date to quit in about a months time, after some planned social obligations. What do others think about setting a 'quit date' and working toward it?

Sapling

I'd set it for today and join the great lady at a meeting...That's just me...

Anna

Do it today, quit now.

There is never, ever a convenient time to stop drinking.

DayTrader

I've only been sober for 5 years but I don't know anyone who set a date for other than "TODAY" that stuck to it. I'm not saying it's impossible but.....I've never seen anyone with quality long term sobriety who did that.

If you're not done drinking yet, you're not done. If you're not done today, my experience has shown me that you'll come up with another reason to kick that date out when it rolls around. It's pretty-much an all or nothing deal.

justhadenough

I can only echo what others have said. The only time to quit is today. There will always be reasons/social functions/excuses we can use in order to drink. Prolonging it won't make them stop. good luck

Sometime

When I wanted to quit by setting a date there was always an excuse to extend it and before you know it months have gone by and I was still drinking!

As Nike says: Just do it!

shockozulu

Everytime I had a planned Quit Date it fell through. The only one that held is Today.

InsertNameHere

Ah I remember setting a day to quit, then another one, then another one, then another one. I even entitled an entire thread "why is it always tomorrow" meaning that for a good couple of weeks I would always plan to quit tomorrow. If I learned anything it is that there is never a good or convenient time to quit with the possible exception of now.

Jeff63

Here's an idea, quit now. Because when you do quit, it will be "now", so get a jump on it and take control of your life.

ReadyAndAble

Yeah, count me among the naysayers as far as future quit days go. If anything I think it worked against me, reinforcing the idea that something good was coming to end. That's just a lie my addiction told me, a con to keep me drinking. In reality, something bad is about to end, and something wonderful is about to start, so why wait another day?

I've heard a lot of people say they wish they had quit sooner. Never heard one say they wish they'd waited longer.

InsertNameHere

Seconded

6palms

Tomorrow!

Reading your post reminds me of all the "days" I have said i was going to quit...see if any sound familiar:
Birthdays...mine, wife's, kids
Cute dates that I would "remember forever" like 10/10/10, 11/11/11, 9/10/11

My latest date was feb.29 since it was leap day...lept over that day with a 12pack:rotfxko

I'm learning a lot on these forums and feeling more confident each day...a couple days ago when I joined, I think I was a bit naive, cocky maybe, about how easy it would be to quit and I made it one day

I am reading everything on this site and am building a stockpile of reasons to make it work this time. Read all the brave stories of success and failure and see where your life could end up. You sound alot like me in that it hasn't gotten "that bad" YET. The most amazing thing to me is that I can't figure out what the appeal of drinking is...I literally can't understand what benefit I get out of having 12 beers, staying up past midnight, just to get up early, hungover and struggle through my day feeling like s##t. So if I set a date for next month to stop drinking, I am basically saying that I would like to feel horrible for three more weeks please!

Sorry, I'm lecturing myself now...but you must admit it sounds pretty stupid when you look at it that way. (I think my post was more for my benefit than yours. . )

Sapling

It's a good post 6palms...For anybody...

desertsong

Great posts here and I would only add this: You can do a lot of damage in a month. Alcoholism being a progressive disease, it gets worse, not better, and in a month you may find it even more difficult to quit than if you had quit today.

No time like the present. I say go for it.

instant

Tomorrow never comes.

Alcohol corrupted my power to respond rationally to a progressive problem. My inner addict told me all sorts of horror stories about what it would be like when I gave up- non of which were true. Sobriety is a gift but it took some courage to "go against the grain" to get started, it was not pleasant but- drinking was not a picnic anymore either.

The social issues we have to learn how to cope with

soberwingz

Mental gymnastics is what I call a quit date. Yep..I saw many days come...and go.

This condition or disease..whatever one wants to call it, is cunning. The beast wants fed.

Let go and start living. Not easy but well worth it.

Keep us posted, and thanks for sharing.

Spinach

Today's the day. Repeat , repeat

Purplecatlover

Setting dates was a really bad idea for me b/c then I would binge harder. I wanted to get as smashed as I could cuz I knew DDay was coming.
Smart thinking right?
You'll know when you're done, when you've had enough, when you can't go another single day like the ones before.
That day will be the best day of your life. Whatever " date" that is.

Dee74

Welcome AQ.

I know it's easier to make a quit date a little ways off and we've all done it.
It didn't work for most of us, as you've seen.

They say the best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is today.
I really believe that

D

jocata

Quit right now. There are always going to be social obligations, sporting events, birthdays, holidays, etc., etc., etc.... Always an excuse to drink.

God bless.